Discussion I think the curse will follow my family for how much they made me delay ctb date

[fkyou]

I think the curse will follow my family for how much they made me delay ctb date.. ain't nothing more horrible than wanting to die and having to wait God knows how many days to do it. Thb it's not easy for me to ctb at all.. (not physically but mentally .actually seriously doing it)that impulsiveness I get sometimes is the only thing that gives me strength and willingness to cary this act.
When I'm not impulsive (which is 99%) I'm just lost in the prolife (love of life cage)

 

[2muchpain2]

this is so relatable. I am holding on for my mom's sake but sometimes i wake up in the middle of the night feeling panicked and impulsive and I try to find something to hang myself and I can't ever just do it