I think I will tell my psychiatrist I have SN, would you?

[lili]

Hey all,

I seem to lately just write on this forum to vent. I think I wrote about telling psychiatrist or not about SN a few months ago.

To put it simply, I feel I am loosing my mind again. I can't seem to end things because my ex boyfriend is always here so it would be pointless. The rare times he leaves the apartment for long periods is not a planned exit, so I have already eaten and haven't done the fasting. I don't want to die while excrementing myself or have a messy exit. I read some posts of people going through that.

Anyways since I feel like am stuck here and I can't seem to CTB, I feel like I am loosing my mind. To be clear this has been happening for a while but I can't take it anymore living here with my ex. It's been like this since October. No family support. Crumbling finances. Alone I can't take it anymore.

I'm supposed to decide whether to leave or not this coming week, but I don't have the money to leave this apartment, so I might have to stay for another year and I can't handle that. To stay or to leave, I don't know. Both seem really bad.

So I think I will tell my psychiatrist that I have SN and just let him decide whatever fate happens to me. I might land at the hospital but at least that would make some level of decision for me as far as my living situation is concerned.

I want to see if anyone has any advice for this or similar situation that I could speak with? I don't know what to do anymore.

 

[mostlycloudy]

I want to help you I'm just not sure what to say. Sorry.

 

[Istanbulite]

You will be referred to police and national health services, probs. are you sure?

 

[Doombox]

It's possible you might get help going in a new direction in the hospital. I support your decision to tell your psychiatrist since you are so desperately stuck. It sounds like almost anything would be better than where you're at right now.

 

[Lullaby]

Telling him would most definitely result in a hospital stay.

If you're considering it and absolutely sure, then maybe talk about what you're going through, including your situation at home, your finances, everything you're struggling with. Just be open about it as you'll probably get a lot more resources to help you get through this.

There's no bad decision, but if you want help that's completely fine and there's nothing wrong with trying.

 

[Dead Ghost]

Some time ago I went to social services saying that I could not continue living in my house in the hope that they would offer me a place or live and a job ... but it seems that I do not belong to the group of people at risk of exclusion or otherwise.

When I explained my situation last summer to those who assessed the disability, because I had requested in advance to go to a residence for the mentally ill, they wanted to refer me to a referral hospital ... I contacted the hospital myself (without identify me) and I understood that I was going to be medicated and admitted to control the dose according to what I was telling them.
You cannot access a residence for the mentally ill unless you are stabilized.

I want them to help me in my own way, but sometimes I have to think about moving forward and make them do what they want me to do in order to get out of where I live.

I clarify that in the last few weeks I have improved quite a bit.

Just tell the person who opened the issue that if they think that (no matter how painful or sacrificed) it really may be the only way to get away with it, to rephrase the "confession" in the psychiatrist, in order to minimize the personal cost of entering a center ... but as I said, it is very difficult, because you can not control the people you will depend on from then on.

I can't help but wish you luck no matter what you choose.

Spoiler: Original Text

Jo fa temps vaig anar als serveis socials dient que no podía seguir vivint a casa meva amb l'esperança de que m'oferessin un lloc o viure i una feina... però es veu que no pertanyo al grup de persones en risc d'exclusió o d'altres tipus.

Quan vaig explicar l'estiu passat la meva situació als que valoren la discapacitat, perquè havía solicitat amb antelació anar a una residéncia per malalts mentals, em volien derivar a un hospital de referència... vaig contactar jo mateix amb l'hospital (sense identificar-me) i vaig entendre que m'anaven a medicar i ingressar per controlar la dosi segons el que els hi explicava.
No pots accedir a una residència per malalts mentals a menys que no estiguis estabilitzat.

Jo vull que m'ajudin a la meva manera, però de vegades si que he pensat de tirar endavant i que facin de mi el que vulguin amb tal de sortir d'on visc.

Aclareixo que les últimes setmanes he millorat bastant.

Només dir-li a la persona que ha obert el tema que si creu que (per doloròs que sigui o sacrificat) realment pot ser l'única manera de ensortir-se'n, que reformuli d'una altre manera la "confessió" al psiquiatre, per tal de minimitzar el cost personal que li suposarà l'ingrés a un centre... però com he dit, és molt difícil, ja que no pots controlar las persones de les que dependràs a partir de llavors.

No puc més que desitjar-te sort escullis el que escullis.

 

[hellispink]

Consider not telling the psychiatrist the name of the substance. Because they could make people more aware of it and make it less available.

 

[MelancholyMagic]

It partly depends on what country you're in. You don't want to be forced into debt over bogus hospital bills. And I agree with hellispink. If you are trying to have the shrink intervene in your life, you probably don't need to make them aware of the substance name. Just saying "poison" may do the trick without giving more negative exposure to SN.

 

[Goghaway]

I warn you to think very carefully about this. If you live in the US they are gonna admit you, most likely depending on your state it might be against your will. Dude, I don't want to scare you because I am totally pro-treatment pro-medication etc, but it is not fun to be on a locked ward with a bunch of weird strangers, absolutely ZERO privacy, being watched 24/7, with no electronics and alllll your personal property taken away including shoelaces...and you can't sign yourself out til they decide you can go. I have been hospitalized 6 times in 2 different states and had horrible, scarring experiences. You have absolutely no dignity and if you are high functioning (check) it doesn't really matter, it's a one size fits all crazy system in the locked wards. (The halfday outpatient hospitalization - where you live in a group home and commute to the facility - is even worse.) I would not recommend putting this decision in someone else's hands. Can you rent a room or something if you really can see no other way out?
Yes, and I second MelancholyMagic up there... depending on what insurance you have, unless it's Medicaid, you can be damn sure you will be seeing some big ass bills. Again, that's the US, cause we're the shithole country of the world now. Lol

 

[wljourney]

I am so sorry you are so stuck in your current situation.

FWIW: your doctor MAY or MAY NOT get you admitted if you tell them that you have the means and are considering CTB.

However (!) a 5 day stay in a psych ward won't solve your problem. You would just be released with a social worker follow up appointment (if you're lucky).
In most countries you can't stay in hospital for an extended time. They are not meant as a housing alternative. And frankly: these places are NOT a relief to stay at. They are not fun.

So, if you want to find a way out of this, I highly recommend asking your doctor for a referral to a social worker.

They will then be able to help find local housing support, help you access alternative services. They are extremely valuable to have in your corner as they know the system.

You may have to resort to staying at a Women's shelter for a while, however they have very strict rules on who they offer help to (as spaces are limited and victims of domestic violence are given priority).

There are solutions to your housing situation. the question is: will you still want to CBT? That won't be any easier in a psych ward or at a shelter.

 

[Marine]

If it can help I'm very open about suicide with my therapists (because they're private therapists, not associated with any hospital and holistic psychologists - aka open minded, not psychiatrists, never talk of suicide with anyone in the medical field) but I'll never tell them what substance I plan on using and it's not relevant anyway, nor if I ended up deciding to do it, it'd be too late then. I've already attempted suicide 3 times and ended up in reanimation everytime and came extremely close to dying, plus I have a long traumatic history, so I'm considered "high risk" btw. Since I'm trying to live I tell them that I'm very close to death but I don't feel like they're taking me seriously or are powerless to help me unfortunately.

 

[novem]

dont tell them you have it
if you dont know what will happen than you are not in control of the consequences.
if you dont know where you are going you will arrive somewhere else

 

[jupiterwinds]

Hey all,

I seem to lately just write on this forum to vent. I think I wrote about telling psychiatrist or not about SN a few months ago.

To put it simply, I feel I am loosing my mind again. I can't seem to end things because my ex boyfriend is always here so it would be pointless. The rare times he leaves the apartment for long periods is not a planned exit, so I have already eaten and haven't done the fasting. I don't want to die while excrementing myself or have a messy exit. I read some posts of people going through that.

Anyways since I feel like am stuck here and I can't seem to CTB, I feel like I am loosing my mind. To be clear this has been happening for a while but I can't take it anymore living here with my ex. It's been like this since October. No family support. Crumbling finances. Alone I can't take it anymore.

I'm supposed to decide whether to leave or not this coming week, but I don't have the money to leave this apartment, so I might have to stay for another year and I can't handle that. To stay or to leave, I don't know. Both seem really bad.

So I think I will tell my psychiatrist that I have SN and just let him decide whatever fate happens to me. I might land at the hospital but at least that would make some level of decision for me as far as my living situation is concerned.

I want to see if anyone has any advice for this or similar situation that I could speak with? I don't know what to do anymore.

I've been living with my ex for 2 years due to being high risk for COVID, disabled, and having no other safe options since my mom is also abusive and wouldn't take COVID precautions for her own daughter. Not sure if you've already made a decision. It's up to you but be prepared to be hospitalized. I'm here if you want to talk. I'm trapped in my situation indefinitely and it's really hard.

 

[onlyanimalsaregood]

Telling him would most definitely result in a hospital stay.

If you're considering it and absolutely sure, then maybe talk about what you're going through, including your situation at home, your finances, everything you're struggling with. Just be open about it as you'll probably get a lot more resources to help you get through this.

There's no bad decision, but if you want help that's completely fine and there's nothing wrong with trying.

I agree. I'm so sorry to hear that you're suffering like that. I would do anything to be able to help you. You know you can count on me and my support. It's good to ask for help. There are things that we really can't overcome on our own. I support you in any decision.