RedFive
Member
- Jan 12, 2020
- 18
Hi SS,
I have been a long time lurker of this forum (about 6 months) and have only just figured out a way to sign up as I live in Australia and the site is blocked. I attempted to CTB in 2014, and the experience did change my view on CTB until recently where I have been effected by the tragic Australian bushfires, accompanied with my fiance of 6 years leaving me.
I wish i signed up earlier and interacted with a few members here, it feels like I know a lot of people due to reading everyones posts without ever interacting with them, everyone seems like such wonderful people who understand what each other is going through.
I would like to share my story on how I survived CTB, and are happy to answer any questions.
I have struggled with mental health for as long as i can remember. Which would seem odd to people who know me as I come across as an outgoing person. I have a great well paying job and consider myself semi-attractive, but it goes to show it can strike anyone. I have sleeping issues where sometimes I don't sleep for days and even after that I still don't feel sleepy, just sick.
To cut a long story short, everything came to a head in 2014. I lost all hope. I researched all methods and decided the Helium hood method would work best for me. I was mid 20's at that stage, but I was a bit naive when it came to all this. I consider myself a smart person, so I did all the research and got everything in order.
I purchased a large helium tank from a local store, and decided to test how long the helium flow would last. it lasted around 40 minutes which was more then enough. When the weekend came along, I purchased the other other items. Tubing for the transport from the tank to the hood which I duck tapped securely to the opening, and two oven bags which I inserted a string where I could tighten the hood once it was over my head.
At that stage I was living at home. So i drove to a local creek, sat in the back of my car and turned the helium tank valve on. I placed the hood over my head and tightened the string around my neck.
After what seemed two deep breathes, i immediately lost consciousness. There was no pain or discomfort. One second I was awake admiring my high pitch voice, the next, nothing.
I remember darkness, until i felt myself slowly waking up. Oh no, it had failed. I woke up laying on my side with the hood still on and the helium had stopped. I sat myself up and opened the car door and stepped out. I immediately fell to the ground as my body was so weak and i lay there gasping for air. I'm not sure how long I was unconscious for, but I estimate it would of been 30-45 minutes. Once I regained some energy I drove home and went to bed. I suffered the headaches of all headaches for a few weeks but no damage was done (that I know of)
I have no idea how I survived. The only things I can think of was maybe the helium had some oxygen in it, or there was a leak where i duct tape the tubing to the tank. I viewed CTB different after that. I didn't really want to experience surviving that again as next time i might do serious damage.
However as I said in my opening paragraph, life as took a major turn for the worse. The fires have caused havoc, the love of my life left me, and now my sleeping issues are back to extreme. I am now looking at SN as an option. (I have purchased the SN, just need to find out how to get the other drugs)
Thank you to those have contributed to the information sharing, especially Stan and even as recently as yesterday, Moonie.
I'm happy to answer any questions, but I feel I'll be a regular around here helping with the research into SN.
I have been a long time lurker of this forum (about 6 months) and have only just figured out a way to sign up as I live in Australia and the site is blocked. I attempted to CTB in 2014, and the experience did change my view on CTB until recently where I have been effected by the tragic Australian bushfires, accompanied with my fiance of 6 years leaving me.
I wish i signed up earlier and interacted with a few members here, it feels like I know a lot of people due to reading everyones posts without ever interacting with them, everyone seems like such wonderful people who understand what each other is going through.
I would like to share my story on how I survived CTB, and are happy to answer any questions.
I have struggled with mental health for as long as i can remember. Which would seem odd to people who know me as I come across as an outgoing person. I have a great well paying job and consider myself semi-attractive, but it goes to show it can strike anyone. I have sleeping issues where sometimes I don't sleep for days and even after that I still don't feel sleepy, just sick.
To cut a long story short, everything came to a head in 2014. I lost all hope. I researched all methods and decided the Helium hood method would work best for me. I was mid 20's at that stage, but I was a bit naive when it came to all this. I consider myself a smart person, so I did all the research and got everything in order.
I purchased a large helium tank from a local store, and decided to test how long the helium flow would last. it lasted around 40 minutes which was more then enough. When the weekend came along, I purchased the other other items. Tubing for the transport from the tank to the hood which I duck tapped securely to the opening, and two oven bags which I inserted a string where I could tighten the hood once it was over my head.
At that stage I was living at home. So i drove to a local creek, sat in the back of my car and turned the helium tank valve on. I placed the hood over my head and tightened the string around my neck.
After what seemed two deep breathes, i immediately lost consciousness. There was no pain or discomfort. One second I was awake admiring my high pitch voice, the next, nothing.
I remember darkness, until i felt myself slowly waking up. Oh no, it had failed. I woke up laying on my side with the hood still on and the helium had stopped. I sat myself up and opened the car door and stepped out. I immediately fell to the ground as my body was so weak and i lay there gasping for air. I'm not sure how long I was unconscious for, but I estimate it would of been 30-45 minutes. Once I regained some energy I drove home and went to bed. I suffered the headaches of all headaches for a few weeks but no damage was done (that I know of)
I have no idea how I survived. The only things I can think of was maybe the helium had some oxygen in it, or there was a leak where i duct tape the tubing to the tank. I viewed CTB different after that. I didn't really want to experience surviving that again as next time i might do serious damage.
However as I said in my opening paragraph, life as took a major turn for the worse. The fires have caused havoc, the love of my life left me, and now my sleeping issues are back to extreme. I am now looking at SN as an option. (I have purchased the SN, just need to find out how to get the other drugs)
Thank you to those have contributed to the information sharing, especially Stan and even as recently as yesterday, Moonie.
I'm happy to answer any questions, but I feel I'll be a regular around here helping with the research into SN.
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