Story I saved someone's life and I feel bad about it

[Codename_Joryu]

It happened 3 years ago during New Year's Eve. I was with a couple of my now ex friends and on a calisthenic park we noticed a guy that that hanged himself with his shoelaces. We quickly rushed to him and tried to help him, and after around 30 minutes of resuscitation and medical help from paramedics we managed to bring him back to life somehow. Back then, I truly felt like some hero, like I did something great and good for the world, but nowadays I just feel guilty about it. It was his choice, we shouldn't intervene, he must have had a good reason behind it seeing how desperate he was (he wasn't even hanging high enough, his feet were touching the floor). What if he even became a vegetable after this? I should've just respected his choice to leave this world in peace, why did I have to play some fucking hero, I hate myself for that.

 

[doomedtolive]

you were with other people, even if you had the outlook on it then as you do now the peer pressure to save a life is strong

 

[Forever Sleep]

No one really knows how they would react in that situation. I think it's incredibly hard to use cold hard logic at a time like that. Plus- you have only seconds to make the decision and it sounds like you were in a group. So- if just one person decided to help, it seems kind of unlikely the others would either pull them back or walk away. Plus- while it likely wouldn't be your first thought- if you hadn't intervened- you may well have been questioned as to why you didn't.

You just don't know with the guy. New Years Eve, lots of people around, shoelaces and a less than ideal place to do it. It may just have been an impulsive attempt by someone under the influence of drugs or alcohol- you just don't know. Maybe they were grateful you helped them in the end- you just don't know. That's the risk of public methods though- people will likely try to stop you if they can. If it wasn't you- it could easily have been someone else. So- I completely get why you feel bad but- they also did kind of put you in a difficult situation. Not to blame the victim but- it really didn't sound planned.

 

[oddetoad]

The right action would be to just ignore him but it's in our DNA to want to help so you shouldn't feel guilty

 

[new2blue]

You saw someone in need and lept in to action. This reaction is built in to us by society and evolution. We are social creatures and band together when we can. I think ending your own life requires a great deal of thought and reflection. If this was impulsive, or as others had said, a result of drug induced nihilism, he probably is thankful, depending on his condition. Before I considered ctb, I would not have had the thought of brain damage being a possibility. I would have done the same thing. Its easy to say what we should have done in hindsight, but in that position at that time of life, it made sense for you to act.

Try not to feel guilty. Most people would have done the same, especially in a group. In fact, had you tried to stop them, you could have been charged with manslaughter or some other stupid charge.

 

[AnonymousL]

It happened 3 years ago during New Year's Eve. I was with a couple of my now ex friends and on a calisthenic park we noticed a guy that that hanged himself with his shoelaces. We quickly rushed to him and tried to help him, and after around 30 minutes of resuscitation and medical help from paramedics we managed to bring him back to life somehow. Back then, I truly felt like some hero, like I did something great and good for the world, but nowadays I just feel guilty about it. It was his choice, we shouldn't intervene, he must have had a good reason behind it seeing how desperate he was (he wasn't even hanging high enough, his feet were touching the floor). What if he even became a vegetable after this? I should've just respected his choice to leave this world in peace, why did I have to play some fucking hero, I hate myself for that.

Where I live you are legally forced to help those in need unless you'd risk your own safety.

That being said , I understand what you're feeling. But you shouldn't feel bad about it. Yes it is his own choice but he has the possibility to do it again if he wants to. Maybe you saving his life that day changed something for him. Showed him that somebody cares enough about his life to safe him from a permanent decision.

If the time is right , there is nobody that will intervene and he will find peace if that is what he wishes.

 

[leavingthesoultrap]

He took the risk with doing it in the public. If it wasn't you maybe someone else would rescue him...

 

[fightingforchoice]

You perhaps didn't have an insight into a suicidal mind at the time, and did what we are hardwired to do: help preserve life. Don't beat yourself up x

 

[Praestat_Mori]

You didn't know better at that time, maybe you've even weren't actively suicidal. You did the right thing at that time bc it's a human reaction to save another human from death, by instinct. Don't blame yourself.

But actually it's true interfering an attempt can have horrible consequences for the one who was rescued. It should be avoided as much as possible bc they made their choice and this is what we have to respect.

 

[Davey36000]

It was a good act, don't feel guilty about it. The problem is, the reasons that lead him to that maybe are hard to fix. If society doesn't have the systems to help others or are deficienf, it's likely that people will just attempt again...

 

[FuneralCry]

Hopefully he is at peace now.

 

[Codename_Joryu]

You didn't know better at that time, maybe you've even weren't actively suicidal. You did the right thing at that time bc it's a human reaction to save another human from death, by instinct. Don't blame yourself.

But actually it's true interfering an attempt can have horrible consequences for the one who was rescued. It should be avoided as much as possible bc they made their choice and this is what we have to respect.

That's what I'm scared about the most. When your brain doesn't get any oxygen, it's functions basically shut down. Sure, maybe that didn't happen to him, but I just can't escape the thought that he might be strapped to bed for the rest of his life, unable to even speak or eat.