artroom1931
大好きだ
- Jul 27, 2020
- 18
I destroyed my entire life by letting my mental illness get the best of me. I lost everything I had. Everything that was important to me.
I feel bad for those who love me because I know my death will hurt them a lot. But if I don't die, I'll continue to cause them problems for the rest of my life. I'll always have them worrying about me. I don't want that for them. If I die, it will hurt, but the pain will eventually fade and they will move on. It's all I can ask for.
The one I love the most wants me to die. I've hurt him so badly so many times. I've been a monster to him. On the day that I die, I plan to cut my arms once for every time I've hurt him or inconvenienced him. I'm just so excited to finally kill myself so he can be happy. I know he'll be so relieved when he hears the news. All I want is to bring his smile back.
I've enjoyed all the moments I've had this last month. I watch every sunset like it's the last one I'll see, do my best to savour all the food I eat, and enjoy time with my friends as best I can. Because I know one day, it'll be my last time doing each of these things. Soon I'll get that opportunity I'm looking for to put my plan into action. And it just can't come soon enough.
I feel bad for those who love me because I know my death will hurt them a lot. But if I don't die, I'll continue to cause them problems for the rest of my life. I'll always have them worrying about me. I don't want that for them. If I die, it will hurt, but the pain will eventually fade and they will move on. It's all I can ask for.
The one I love the most wants me to die. I've hurt him so badly so many times. I've been a monster to him. On the day that I die, I plan to cut my arms once for every time I've hurt him or inconvenienced him. I'm just so excited to finally kill myself so he can be happy. I know he'll be so relieved when he hears the news. All I want is to bring his smile back.
I've enjoyed all the moments I've had this last month. I watch every sunset like it's the last one I'll see, do my best to savour all the food I eat, and enjoy time with my friends as best I can. Because I know one day, it'll be my last time doing each of these things. Soon I'll get that opportunity I'm looking for to put my plan into action. And it just can't come soon enough.