Venting I really don't think I can wait 3 more weeks until my will is sorted.

[SHThrowAway213]

The will is to make sure my dog stays with my Mum.
In the UK, if you are married when you die, all your property and money goes to your spouse.
I know my husband (separated) would not be able to look after her, and his Nan would not even allow her in her flat.
Also I know he needs the money so I'm pretty sure he would just sell her.
I'm not sure what will happen to my dog if I kill myself before I sign my will.
But it is getting unbearable.
I really can't take it anymore.
I would usally drink to cope, but my parents would not let me drink and I can't even afford it.
I stopped taking my meds around 2-3 weeks ago. (Risperdone, Ablify, Ranitidine, Fostair, Amtriplyne)
I did it because I knew my hallucinations would encourage me to kill myself and drive me insane, which they are.
But it is making me want to kill myself a lot sooner.
This is so fucking unbearable.

 

[miguel6565]

im so sorry you in sou much pain,maybe take your meds again and keep living till you know what to do whit your dog,you can always pm me and talk

 

[nitroautnz]

Im very sorry to read that you are in so much pain and distress, maybe you should do as miguel6565 say and taker you med only for holding up until your will is sorted? Like that you can live this shitty world with a peaceful mind knowing that your last wish will be follow

 

[RC90]

Oh that pic of yours it's beachy head right? I've been there when I used to live in the UK. Never had the courage to jump si would always kick in. I'm sorry you're in a lot of pain, but stopping all those meds at once is dangerous. Maybe taper a bit?

 

[SHThrowAway213]

im so sorry you in sou much pain,maybe take your meds again and keep living till you know what to do whit your dog,you can always pm me and talk

Thank you.

Im very sorry to read that you are in so much pain and distress, maybe you should do as miguel6565 say and taker you med only for holding up until your will is sorted? Like that you can live this shitty world with a peaceful mind knowing that your last wish will be follow

I'm not sure if I can start taking my meds again before I die, it would take a few weeks for them to be effective.

Oh that pic of yours it's beachy head right? I've been there when I used to live in the UK. Never had the courage to jump si would always kick in. I'm sorry you're in a lot of pain, but stopping all those meds at once is dangerous. Maybe taper a bit?

Yeah, I can never overcome SI with jumping but it's the only method I can do at the moment.
I appreciate your advice, but it is too late to taper as it has been around 2-3 weeks since I last took them.

 

[RC90]

Thank you.

I'm not sure if I can start taking my meds again before I die, it would take a few weeks for them to be effective.

Yeah, I can never overcome SI with jumping but it's the only method I can do at the moment.
I appreciate your advice, but it is too late to taper as it has been around 2-3 weeks since I last took them.

Then the worst part of coming off them is gone. Do you feel better or worse after you stopped it?

 

[SHThrowAway213]

Then the worst part of coming off them is gone. Do you feel better or worse after you stopped it?

Worse, but that was the whole point.

 

[AynoTnTime]

The will is to make sure my dog stays with my Mum.
In the UK, if you are married when you die, all your property and money goes to your spouse.
I know my husband (separated) would not be able to look after her, and his Nan would not even allow her in her flat.
Also I know he needs the money so I'm pretty sure he would just sell her.
I'm not sure what will happen to my dog if I kill myself before I sign my will.
But it is getting unbearable.
I really can't take it anymore.
I would usally drink to cope, but my parents would not let me drink and I can't even afford it.
I stopped taking my meds around 2-3 weeks ago. (Risperdone, Ablify, Ranitidine, Fostair, Amtriplyne)
I did it because I knew my hallucinations would encourage me to kill myself and drive me insane, which they are.
But it is making me want to kill myself a lot sooner.
This is so fucking unbearable.

Be strong for your dog.