I overcame my social anxiety.

[Notaname]

I failed at getting a nitrogen bottle yesterday. I spent all night and this morning regretting my choice, crying, and generally hating existence. I drove back to the place today and forced myself into the social interaction and got my nitrogen bottle. I just need to get a regulator and barbed fitting now. I read some stuff that using a rebreather mask can have leaks and cause brain injury rather than exit. I think I'm going to put a bag over my head along with the rebreather just to be extra sure. I did get a good seal with my mask and it forms a vacuum when inhaling, but opens on the side when exhaling. I'm sure it would be fine, but I really can't risk failure. I had a friend tell me a story of a really hard time they survived and it made me feel like I could too, but then life came right back around to remind me and I don't really know where I want to go now.

 

[FuneralCry]

I wish you the best in whatever you decide.