I never found love and i would like to be loved before i go

[somerandomguy1]

All my life , I have struggled to make good communication without having getting anxious or scared. It took a lot for me to talk to girls, now, when I know that I dont want to live anymore and I have a plan to end my life soon, but, as a last wish I would like to be loved. Love that I have never had and never experienced.
I look decent and I don't have a muscular body but I am average and I play good amount of soccer and I am healthy. I am 32 M and I wish I would meet a person who would love me for who I am and that's all I wish before I end my life.

 

[Linalez]

Hi.
Put an ad on the Megapartner recovery thread even if you plan to ctb in the end. Love is partial recovery or partial search thereof.
Say just what you've shared here and hope for the best.
There are plenty of couples here, I have one on my Telegram suicide group.

 

[somerandomguy1]

Hi.
Put an ad on the Megapartner recovery thread even if you plan to ctb in the end. Love is partial recovery or partial search thereof.
Say just what you've shared here and hope for the best.
There are plenty of couples here, I have one on my Telegram suicide group.

Hi. Can you tell me how to join the telegram channel

All my life , I have struggled to make good communication without having getting anxious or scared. It took a lot for me to talk to girls, now, when I know that I dont want to live anymore and I have a plan to end my life soon, but, as a last wish I would like to be loved. Love that I have never had and never experienced.
I look decent and I don't have a muscular body but I am average and I play good amount of soccer and I am healthy. I am 32 M and I wish I would meet a person who would love me for who I am and that's all I wish before I end my life.

I am from Ireland and if there is any girl younger or around my age please pm me. I want to talk and don't want to feel alone.

 

[Some place nice]

I see so many people, including myself, wish for love before they Ctb. Its sad to see and I wish you could've experienced it it least once. I am sorry.

 

[somerandomguy1]

I see so many people, including myself, wish for love before they Ctb. Its sad to see and I wish you could've experienced it it least once. I am sorry.

I want to feel that way once. Fall asleep in her arms, cook for her, take her to the movies and dance with her in a pub. Have drinks and shots and scream with happiness. If you want to talk, you can pm me. We can talk.

 

[Roseate]

Wouldn't that be kind of unfair or maybe a bit selfish? To allow someone to have feelings for you knowing you're going to break their hearts in the worse way possible? By dying? You'll be passing your pain onto them, idk it's nice if you have it but it just seems cruel to put a random person just trying to live and love through all that.

 

[Some place nice]

I want to feel that way once. Fall asleep in her arms, cook for her, take her to the movies and dance with her in a pub. Have drinks and shots and scream with happiness. If you want to talk, you can pm me. We can talk.

Sorry I am a little dumb, so I don't know how to pm.

 

[somerandomguy1]

Sorry I am a little dumb, so I don't know how to pm.

I don't know how to pm as well. I am researching. Bear with me

Wouldn't that be kind of unfair or maybe a bit selfish? To allow someone to have feelings for you knowing you're going to break their hearts in the worse way possible? By dying? You'll be passing your pain onto them, idk it's nice if you have it but it just seems cruel to put a random person just trying to live and love through all that.

I am sorry I don't know how that feels, I have never loved someone to feel that way.

 

[Some place nice]

I don't know how to pm as well. I am researching. Bear with me


I am sorry I don't know how that feels, I have never loved someone to feel that way.

If you are a new member than you can't pm just yet.

 

[somerandomguy1]

If you are a new member than you can't pm just yet.

Ah I see. How can i send you a message?

 

[Some place nice]

Ah I see. How can i send you a message?

does thou have discord?

 

[EvisceratedJester]

You know, I've never really understood why people are so obsessed with romantic love. It's not like it's any better or any more special than any other type of love. The only difference is that we as a society have decided to put it on a pedestal. My dad has a similar mindset to you when it comes to love and all it has led him to is a series of failing relationships, some of which are toxic and/or abusive. Hence why wish he would take a break from romantic relationships altogether... Either way, whether or not you get a girlfriend or not isn't going to make much of a difference. Once you are dead you won't care, and that's the beauty of it.

 

[Roseate]

I don't know how to pm as well. I am researching. Bear with me


I am sorry I don't know how that feels, I have never loved someone to feel that way.

I don't think it's about love. It's being a decent person I believe. You don't have to love someone intimately to be hurt by them dying, so what do think after a relationship brief or not? It's cruel, plain and simple. And you'll leave someone with suicidal thoughts, depression… everything you didn't want to feel anymore they will now feel. I just think it's extremely selfish and while selfishness is okay to an extent, traumatizing someone purposefully that's something else. Idk I'm not trying to be, it's just things I've thought myself. Sometimes we want to experience things because they are things we never got to feel, but if it puts another person at risk of pain, sometimes it's just better without.

 

[somerandomguy1]

does thou have discord?

Yes. Give me ur id

 

[Roseate]

You know, I've never really understood why people are so obsessed with romantic love. It's not like it's any better or any more special than any other type of love. The only difference is that we as a society have decided to put it on a pedestal. My dad has a similar mindset to you when it comes to love and all it has led him to is a series of failing relationships, some of which are toxic and/or abusive. Hence why wish he would take a break from romantic relationships altogether... Either way, whether or not you get a girlfriend or not isn't going to make much of a difference. Once you are dead you won't care, and that's the beauty of it.

It's the thought. It seems beautiful from a distance but reality is most people don't experience true love or happiness but we grasp at the idea of it and want to experience it for ourselves. I believe unless it's the real deal, it's a disappointment. Just another person that's going to further traumatize you anyways. It's a joke. It makes zero difference, and doesn't even necessarily make people happy.

 

[somerandomguy1]

You know, I've never really understood why people are so obsessed with romantic love. It's not like it's any better or any more special than any other type of love. The only difference is that we as a society have decided to put it on a pedestal. My dad has a similar mindset to you when it comes to love and all it has led him to is a series of failing relationships, some of which are toxic and/or abusive. Hence why wish he would take a break from romantic relationships altogether... Either way, whether or not you get a girlfriend or not isn't going to make much of a difference. Once you are dead you won't care, and that's the beauty of it.

Okay. I don't think my brain can give you a reply. I am fine with your answer.

It's the thought. It seems beautiful from a distance but reality is most people don't experience true love or happiness but we grasp at the idea of it and want to experience it for ourselves. I believe unless it's the real deal, it's a disappointment. Just another person that's going to further traumatize you anyways. It's a joke. It makes zero difference, and doesn't even necessarily make people happy.

Hmmm i understand but how can you hurt me
more than what I am at right now.

Yes. Give me ur id

somerandomguy_00000 that's me

 

[Old Friend]

You know, I've never really understood why people are so obsessed with romantic love. It's not like it's any better or any more special than any other type of love. The only difference is that we as a society have decided to put it on a pedestal. My dad has a similar mindset to you when it comes to love and all it has led him to is a series of failing relationships, some of which are toxic and/or abusive. Hence why wish he would take a break from romantic relationships altogether... Either way, whether or not you get a girlfriend or not isn't going to make much of a difference. Once you are dead you won't care, and that's the beauty of it.

We're kinda designed to reproduce and replace ourselves, so I think it's quite understandable that romantic love is a big deal to most people, at least to some extent.

 

[somerandomguy1]

does thou have discord?

somerandomguy_00000
that's my discord

 

[EvisceratedJester]

We're kinda designed to reproduce and replace ourselves, so I think it's quite understandable that romantic love is a big deal to most people, at least to some extent.

Yeah, except reproduction doesn't require romantic love, and close familial and platonic relationships also play just as an important role in our survival as a species. While some of our thoughts and behaviours are instinctual, a lot of them are more strongly affected by societal expectations. A lot of what people claim makes romantic relationships special revolves more around unrealistic ideals that are continually pushed in our faces, rather than an instinctual need for them. At the end of the day, they really aren't any more special than any other type of relationship.

 

[somerandomguy1]

Yeah, except reproduction doesn't require romantic love, and close familial and platonic relationships also play just as an important role in our survival as a species. While some of our thoughts and behaviours are instinctual, a lot of them are more strongly affected by societal expectations. A lot of what people claim makes romantic relationships special revolves more around unrealistic ideals that are continually pushed in our faces, rather than an instinctual need for them. At the end of the day, they really aren't any more special than any other type of relationship.

You don't know what love is? Have you received unconditional love?

 

[Some place nice]

somerandomguy_00000
that's my discord

sorry i had to make a new one

 

[somerandomguy1]

sorry i had to make a new one

Thank you

 

[LivingInDaydreams]

All my life , I have struggled to make good communication without having getting anxious or scared. It took a lot for me to talk to girls, now, when I know that I dont want to live anymore and I have a plan to end my life soon, but, as a last wish I would like to be loved. Love that I have never had and never experienced.
I look decent and I don't have a muscular body but I am average and I play good amount of soccer and I am healthy. I am 32 M and I wish I would meet a person who would love me for who I am and that's all I wish before I end my life.

I understand what you mean, I've had similar issues finding love. I honestly just gave up, I never saw a point in finding anyone if I was going to CBT anyways at some point. I do understand the longing and loneliness though. I just had to realize it wasn't going to work out for me. I do hope you can find someone to give you that feeling before you go.

 

[somerandomguy1]

sorry i had to make a new one

I sent you a DM

 

[EvisceratedJester]

You don't know what love is? Have you received unconditional love?

Yeah, mainly from family. You don't need to be in a romantic relationship to know what love is.

 

[DearAgony]

I know exactly how you feel. I've never been in a relationship in my 38 years and at this point I'm almost scared of it. I hope love blossoms for you somehow.

 

[somerandomguy1]

Yeah, mainly from family. You don't need to be in a romantic relationship to know what love is.

Its okay. I don't know that either.. I lost my dad when i was young and my mom loves me but she struggled to give us a good life. Though she was not much around, I respect my
mum and I love her for being my strength. Life is difficult

 

[Some place nice]

Thank you

you are gonna hate me. but i can't use fucking discord it wont let me login again. i am so sorry the world fucking hates me. you seemed so nice too.

 

[somerandomguy1]

I know exactly how you feel. I've never been in a relationship in my 38 years and at this point I'm almost scared of it. I hope love blossoms for you somehow.

Thanks. It's difficult. I am struggling everyday and I feel so alone.

you are gonna hate me. but i can't use fucking discord it wont let me login again. i am so sorry the world fucking hates me. you seemed so nice too.

I will wait for you.

 

[Some place nice]

Thanks. It's difficult. I am struggling everyday and I feel so alone

I will wait for you.

and I you.