Venting i miss the people who died here

[mmj]

i read a couple posts by the same person talking about their suicide until the day they committed
I felt close to this person even though they are dead and don't know me, but I miss them
they talked about their life in some of their posts and how they had a younger sibling, they reminded me of myself
I'm not good at saying what I feel but all I can say is that I miss them, I feel the same way when looking at old photo albums with people who are long dead now

 

[アホペンギン]

I feel a deep sense of regret for making friends here. The friends I made here are the friends I've wanted my whole life, I was unaware that they'd leave me very soon before I got to know them well.

But yes, I also miss those who I wasn't very close to, as well. Its sad seeing so many people go but its the fact of life, at least if you're part of our minority, those who use SS.

 

[ringo99]

Vizzy is the one I miss the most here. He always seemed to be around with helpful advice on how to ctb. There was a kind of precision to him. No bs just straight to the point. I always appreciated that.

RIP buddy o7

 

[WAITING TO DIE]

Yes, this is my third account since 2020.
I've talked to some of the most amazing people on this forum in the past who are no longer here.
I still think of some of them because we used to chat a lot and had gone through similar experiences in life.
I stayed up last weekend to chat with someone who didn't want to be alone before ctb.
They were one of the most intelligent and insightful people I had ever talked to, and it hit me hard when they went.
I have thought about them several times this week, yet am glad they are no longer suffering.

 

[FuneralCry]

At least they are at peace now and cannot suffer anymore. I always envy those who are now peacefully not existing.

 

[nibbleone]

I miss Vizzy too. What a cool cat.

 

[carac]

The ones I remember most were hopefulsleep and jule_from_germany. Hopefulsleep was always posting, asking questions since I first joined, he seemed so desperate, I will always remember his avatar, don't even know what it was, some confused looking anime dude haha. And his last goodbye post was so sad. Then jules, she was declining physically and wanted her own way out, I believe she died naturally in the end, I was happy she found peace and is now resting, she gave a lot here and got a lot of comfort back I felt.

 

[Lost Magic]

While I met some awesome people here (who may have passed) I won't make attachments to people on this forum. It would be too painful for me and I am not very good at it anyway.

 

[Ε. Η. R.]

I really regret that I found this site too late. I'm going to cbt by the end of this year.
I met the fatal monster ("human") on April 21, 2018. That's why I'm in hell now.
If I had come here in the first place, there wouldn't have been all this absolute hell for 5 years. I could help people, make good friends...

 

[WAITING TO DIE]

The ones I remember most were hopefulsleep and jule_from_germany. Hopefulsleep was always posting, asking questions since I first joined, he seemed so desperate, I will always remember his avatar, don't even know what it was, some confused looking anime dude haha. And his last goodbye post was so sad. Then jules, she was declining physically and wanted her own way out, I believe she died naturally in the end, I was happy she found peace and is now resting, she gave a lot here and got a lot of comfort back I felt.

Yes, I remember jule.
At one point She thought the surgery had helped, and then found out it hadn't. So sad.

 

[something_feels]

This comments are genuinely making me tear up, man. I'm so fucking sorry for all of your losses

 

[WAITING TO DIE]

While I met some awesome people here (who may have passed) I won't make attachments to people on this forum. It would be too painful for me and I am not very good at it anyway.

Yes, very good advice. I have made the mistake of doing this and it's awful.

 

[Iamtired]

I really regret that I found this site too late. I'm going to cbt by the end of this year.
I met the fatal monster ("human") on April 21, 2018. That's why I'm in hell now.
If I had come here in the first place, there wouldn't have been all this absolute hell for 5 years. I could help people, make good friends...

Is the human you refer to as a monster a Psychopath? Or is this something totally different & im misunderstanding. Sorry again if I am…

 

[Worndown]

If you are on here fir a while, this is an issue. The good thing is they are remembered and missed. They are part of our family.

 

[XdragonsoulX]

I miss a few souls here, I never knew them personally and only really read their posts. But those who gave their stories and their experiences stick with me I remember them, but I have my peace and remember them when it gets too heavy

 

[Myforevercharlie]

That's the down side of befriending people here...

Some users will forever hold a little place in my heart.
@faust @TheNorthernSilence @phezel @leeloosnow

But even though it hurts , it won't stop me befriending others. I feel fortunate to have met these people, especially here, especially in the darkest part of their lives. They gave me their trust and friendship, I can only see the beauty of that.

 

[thereisthemist]

I say, give huggies, while you still can...

 

[SNastablesalt]

i read a couple posts by the same person talking about their suicide until the day they committed
I felt close to this person even though they are dead and don't know me, but I miss them
they talked about their life in some of their posts and how they had a younger sibling, they reminded me of myself
I'm not good at saying what I feel but all I can say is that I miss them, I feel the same way when looking at old photo albums with people who are long dead now

this is my first post on here, lol, I've been lurking for about a year now. I miss vizzy.

 

[deathxo]

That comes with the territory no Each one of us, taking the elevator outta here, one by one. While the rest wave goodbye.
In all honestly, I get deathly afraid of even replying to goodbye threads. Somehow it's just too disturbing to wrap my head around. Their last steps & plan & then they will be no more. As much as I want to send some love and last kind words, I can't bring myself to do it.

I also miss Pracheen Kal. Never talked to them or anything, but saw them sharing the plan, asking for advice, hastening their plan. They were so desperate. I miss not saying their name anymore here :( I hope they have some peace now, Wherever they may be.

 

[Namensjemand]

Those who died tended to be those most composed.

But truth is WE all are the end spectrum of a Vortex of BS and any Angel in this Vortex to be Kind ist Like Armageddon by Bruce Willis even though IT IS George Bush by oil 4 blood or sth

 

[betternever2havbeen]

The ones I remember most were hopefulsleep and jule_from_germany. Hopefulsleep was always posting, asking questions since I first joined, he seemed so desperate, I will always remember his avatar, don't even know what it was, some confused looking anime dude haha. And his last goodbye post was so sad. Then jules, she was declining physically and wanted her own way out, I believe she died naturally in the end, I was happy she found peace and is now resting, she gave a lot here and got a lot of comfort back I felt.

It's incredibly sad, the people I spoke to a bit on here privately, I never even knew until a couple weeks after they'd CTB that they actually went through with it-don't know how I missed their goodbye threads. Gutted I didn't get to talk with them one last time. Hopefulsleep always comes to mind for me as well, such a sad story all around with him.

 

[babychicken🐥]

I get kinda sad just seeing the crossed out name:( I hope they are happier now at least:)

 

[Ε. Η. R.]

Is the human you refer to as a monster a Psychopath? Or is this something totally different & im misunderstanding. Sorry again if I am…

Worse.
I'm not sure about her diagnosis.
she once wrote to me the kindest and most gentle words that I have heard in my life . Then she betrayed me, then tortured, hounding me along with the whore (in the literal sense of the word).
This is a long story and cannot be explained in a couple of sentences. Hopefully I'll gather strength this week to write my story.
Sorry if my English sounds strange.

 

[Iamtired]

Worse.
I'm not sure about her diagnosis.
She once wrote to me the kindest and most gentle words that I have heard in my life . Then she betrayed me, then tortured, hounding me along with the whore (in the literal sense of the word).
This is a long story and cannot be explained in a couple of sentences. Hopefully I'll gather strength this week to write my story.
Sorry if my English sounds strange.

I had a similar thing happen to me. But "male" version or whatever one can call him. But I only met him a year ago and my life fell apart. I'm sorry this happened to you. I am in torturous pain and wish to CTB by the end of this year too.

 

[brokeandbroken]

I just hope they have found peace.

 

[RW__Asher23]

leeloosnow RIP

The castle I made for you on my printer? Yeah it is there where you are now just for you. Because you loved it. See you on the other side. My ctb date is set. Peace.

 

[Forever Sleep]

There are people I really miss too. It's an odd mixture of feelings. Part of me has to feel relieved for them. They are at peace now. Still- it's still grief and loss we experience and we probably can't tell anyone about it- outside of this community.

 

[ClownWorld2023]

There are also people who 'disappear'.

They haven't been seen on the forums for weeks or even months.
You don't know whether they CTBed or recovered and moved on.

You can only speculate and hope they're doing fine wherever they are.
It's tough.

 

[Goodgirlryeo101]

I Miss Vizzy … he was such a light, may he rest in peace …..

 

[avaruus]

Personally, i never interacted with 'HopefulSleep', but damn, seeing his posts during all over the summer then suddenly, gone in august, it hit me hard.

Also the passing of 'toofargone6969' recently, can't lie, made me cry.

But i'm glad that they are at peace now.