Venting I just want to die in the worse way ever. EVER.

[seeweed]

i want someone to rip my organs out and strangles me with it. Yes, i know ill be unconscious the moment they rip out my organs but hey, why not make it worse by cutting out my airflow with it? Or make permanent marks from strangling me so badly that'll be seen in my autopsy? Sometimes im so deep in my hatred I want to give everyone a view they'll never recover from. But anywho, I know not to be an asshole and involve others in whatever fucked up shit im doing, but at this point, even if i get caught while ctb, im gonna do anyfuckingthing to get me out of this shithole of a world. Rehab? Not stopping me. A therapist? They never help. Accountability from my parents? Too fucking late. Nothing is gonna make me happy. No one will make me stay in this hellhole.

 

[liquid jen]

Sometimes I feel like I'm plagued by the daydreams of brutally dying. There's something so releasing about the visceral brutality of the worst i can imagine. And it's only amplified if it's in public. But, as you said, it would be wrong to involve others. I hate this. I hate it all.