I just want a violin

[blueclover_.]

So i'm thinking about ctbing soon but there is one last thing that gives me hope. That i can get my own violin and make music for a living. I've always wanted to be a ballerina or a violinist, but i was born into such a household that makes it almost impossible. As my date is getting closer, i find myself fantasizing about playing my own violin in joy. I, or my SI, is seriously clinging into that tiny possibility that i can be happy within my own terms.

I'm not working and i have no money of my own. Growing up in a muslim family in a third world country, my parents are very controlling. They pay for all my stuff in hopes that i will stay here in this house forever and take care of them when they're old. They love me because i am their retirement plan. And i simply cannot accept that fact.

I want to move to Canada and start a new life. But that requires a lot of money. I don't have the energy to join the rat race. I just want to play a violin and live inside the beautiful melodies.

I just want a violin.

 

[Pluto]

It looks like beginner violins start at a low price on eBay. And you will find endless tutorials on YouTube. It takes a lot of practice, but this comes naturally if it's your calling.

When I was younger, I wrote and recorded a lot of music as it was a big outlet for me, though it never really went anywhere. There can be a few ways to make it into a career. There's instrument sales at music shops, instrument servicing/repairs, teaching, orchestras, even soloists.

 

[blueclover_.]

It looks like beginner violins start at a low price on eBay. And you will find endless tutorials on YouTube. It takes a lot of practice, but this comes naturally if it's your calling.

When I was younger, I wrote and recorded a lot of music as it was a big outlet for me, though it never really went anywhere. There can be a few ways to make it into a career. There's instrument sales at music shops, instrument servicing/repairs, teaching, orchestras, even soloists.

Thank you for your input. The problem is that if my parents find it, they would throw it away for sure. And if i protest i'll get kicked out. And be homeless.

They want me to be a doctor. I rebelled and chose to major on IT. They'd kill me if i say that i want to be a violinist.

 

[Rational man]

So i'm thinking about ctbing soon but there is one last thing that gives me hope. That i can get my own violin and make music for a living. I've always wanted to be a ballerina or a violinist, but i was born into such a household that makes it almost impossible. As my date is getting closer, i find myself fantasizing about playing my own violin in joy. I, or my SI, is seriously clinging into that tiny possibility that i can be happy within my own terms.

I'm not working and i have no money of my own. Growing up in a muslim family in a third world country, my parents are very controlling. They pay for all my stuff in hopes that i will stay here in this house forever and take care of them when they're old. They love me because i am their retirement plan. And i simply cannot accept that fact.

I want to move to Canada and start a new life. But that requires a lot of money. I don't have the energy to join the rat race. I just want to play a violin and live inside the beautiful melodies.

I just want a violin.

Forgive me for my ignorance, but is this Parents, children pension provision a Muslim cultural thing ?

 

[yive]

it is a pretty familiar situation for me. a few years ago i started playing the piano for the same reason ("to live inside the beautiful melodies").
my overprotective/controlling parents want the same, and they will never get it ("They love me because i am their retirement plan").

i listen to a lot of music. music helps me a little, but i still feel terrible... i also like to compose music, but i don't see any sense or purpose in it. the only thing i want is to ctb.

p. s. just wanted to say that i really understand you. anyway, best wishes from me...

 

[blueclover_.]

Forgive me for my ignorance, but is this Parents, children pension provision a Muslim cultural thing ?

Yes. Children literally can't say "ugh" to their parents because they sACrifICEd so much for their children, even though the kids never asked to be born lol. It is literally in a hadith and in the asian culture as well.

it is a pretty familiar situation for me. a few years ago i started playing the piano for the same reason ("to live inside the beautiful melodies").
my overprotective/controlling parents want the same, and they will never get it ("They love me because i am their retirement plan").

i listen to a lot of music. music helps me a little, but i still feel terrible... i also like to compose music, but i don't see any sense or purpose in it. the only thing i want is to ctb.

p. s. just wanted to say that i really understand you. anyway, best wishes from me...

Thank you, i feel less alone in this situation.

And i love piano! Almost as much as i love violin. When i was at my lowest point of depression (8th grade), i remember coming home from school feeling burnt out and just sitting there in my room listening to Moonlight Sonata for 3 hours until i fall asleep. It's a mainstream piece but i love it so much!

 

[Rational man]

Yes. Children literally can't say "ugh" to their parents because they sACrifICEd so much for their children, even though the kids never asked to be born lol. It is literally in a hadith and in the asian culture as well.


Thank you, i feel less alone in this situation.

And i love piano! Almost as much as i love violin. When i was at my lowest point of depression (8th grade), i remember coming home from school feeling burnt out and just sitting there in my room listening to Moonlight Sonata for 3 hours until i fall asleep. It's a mainstream piece but i love it so much!

Thanks for clarification. Hope you find a way forward❤

 

[Someone123]

I hope you can find happiness, and I.T. can be a very rewarding career path, so don't look down on this. I just want to let you know some information about the violin, since I knew someone who was in college for this and was doing very well and is virtually certainly a professional violinist now. He did start playng the violin when he was six years old, and he was very serious with the lessons starting at this age, playing one to two hours a day minimum since that time. He did say something to the effect that if you want to be a professional that you do need to start by age six and that someone he knew was going to start playing about age ten and that this was way too late to become a professional. I just read a post of someone who started at age 11 and though they are an extremely fast learner, according to their teacher, it is just way too late to become a professional. You can learn to play violin later in life, but to be able to make a living playing in an orchestra the consensus online is that you need to start by about age six. Some posts online say that if you start ate age ten you can still make it if you practice four hours a day. So I do think that it is good to encourage dreams but also it is important to realize what is realistic in some ways. Violinists don't really make a good living unless you are higher up, I.T. people make a much better living, and this is very important. I think you will be much happier on an I.T. career path.

 

[chocolatebar]

in hopes that i will stay here in this house forever and take care of them when they're old

This is the thing that gives me agonizing pain. My mom already held my in a metaphorical leash for all my life and now, that I'm trying to break away and run, she's playing the sick one to guilt me into staying

 

[KuriGohan&Kamehameha]

There is a good series of books called Essential Elements and Suzuki violin that are good for beginners. However, it will be very hard to learn without a teacher especially as you get to more advanced techniques like vibrato.

There's also an app that will help you learn how to tune your instrument and can pick up on which notes you're hitting. I can't remember what it is called but it should be high up in the music section on the play store.

I used to play violin for around a year and a half, until my illness made it very painful for me to stand up or sit for long periods of time. My arms would get sore from holding it too.

I will warn you the classical music community is not as welcoming to beginners as say something like guitar, which many people pick up on later in life. My ex was a concert musician and pretty much all of his colleagues (in addition to him) had been playing since they were 6-7 years old and had their parents motivating their entire journey.

I tried my best to get better at music but I was never allowed to play in any groups because I just couldn't hit the skill ceiling of violinists who had been practicing since childhood. My ex told me I should just give up because I was fighting a losing battle. Many teachers will only take on children as their pupils because they see adults as flakey/lost causes. There was always an air of snobbery and privledge around many orchestra instructors and students that I came across too.

By no means do I want to discourage you from your dream, I just want to warn you that it may be difficult to find an accepting music community who will help you achieve this goal.

 

[blueclover_.]

I hope you can find happiness, and I.T. can be a very rewarding career path, so don't look down on this. I just want to let you know some information about the violin, since I knew someone who was in college for this and was doing very well and is virtually certainly a professional violinist now. He did start playng the violin when he was six years old, and he was very serious with the lessons starting at this age, playing one to two hours a day minimum since that time. He did say something to the effect that if you want to be a professional that you do need to start by age six and that someone he knew was going to start playing about age ten and that this was way too late to become a professional. I just read a post of someone who started at age 11 and though they are an extremely fast learner, according to their teacher, it is just way too late to become a professional. You can learn to play violin later in life, but to be able to make a living playing in an orchestra the consensus online is that you need to start by about age six. Some posts online say that if you start ate age ten you can still make it if you practice four hours a day. So I do think that it is good to encourage dreams but also it is important to realize what is realistic in some ways. Violinists don't really make a good living unless you are higher up, I.T. people make a much better living, and this is very important. I think you will be much happier on an I.T. career path.

I know, it's too late for me to be a professional. But i mainly want to play it because i like it. The melody of a violin makes me feel calm. It's more of a hobby than a serious career plan. I'm ok with working at any job, as long as at the end of the day i can play my violin and escape this world for some time. Just me and the Swan Lake.

 

[Idontrecognizemyself]

I'm ok with working at any job, as long as at the end of the day i can play my violin and escape this world for some time

I think this is the mindset you have to have to survive abusive family dynamics. I am in a similar place, I was forced into a health career at a young age, because the art I really wanted to do was pointless and stupid in their eyes. I find comfort in that when I graduate in May I can take a part time job and still have enough money to support me and energy left for my actual passions. There's good money in IT, if you can make it to the end (I don't know where you are in your track or how dire your situation is), you will be able to indulge in the most lovely musical instruments. It's so hard in school but if you can bear it, you can pull the """move away because you got a good job offer""" and start living for yourself

 

[lobster salad]

Hello please take my violin. I used to love it after my dad played lovely classical music in the car but after my mom signed me up for exams I have to play songs I dislike against my will. Then depression made it a nasty chore my mom forced into my 'routine' . take my violin, I like it but not at this point where it's another meaningless chore. As youcan see in my moms picture of my daily chores to fulfil violin is one of them.

 

[blueclover_.]

View attachment 79093Hello please take my violin. I used to love it after my dad played lovely classical music in the car but after my mom signed me up for exams I have to play songs I dislike against my will. Then depression made it a nasty chore my mom forced into my 'routine' . take my violin, I like it but not at this point where it's another meaningless chore. As youcan see in my moms picture of my daily chores to fulfil violin is one of them.

Ok first of all, i like your username. Second of all, i probably live an ocean away from you. Third of all, to hell with the system. If you like violin, play what you like. Not what you must. But if you feel like these exams are important, maybe try to hang on there for a bit. If you think those exams are not important, then screw everything else. I, too, hate everything that becomes a chore. I truly hope you can live for yourself and do what you want.

I know it's not easy. Things will always be easier said than done. I wish i could use some of these advices for myself.

 

[FuneralCry]

I have always admired people who can play instruments, the talent and skill they have. I hope things do work out for you, I wish you the best, at least you have something you enjoy. However if you decide to exit this world then I wish you peace.

 

[Manaaja]

I always wanted to learn to play the violin when I was younger. It's a beautiful instrument.

I wish you could get a violin and play it, and get to Canada. It would be nice if everyone could do whatever they want. I wish everything didn't require money.

 

[Hangman]

Similarly I want a classical guitar or a clarinet.

Don't a violin grate your ears?

Mandolin is like the worst sounding instrument and they have a lot in common.

 

[blueclover_.]

Don't a violin grate your ears?

Any instrument that is played without skill is going to sound horrible.

Mandolin is like the worst sounding instrument and they have a lot in common.

Not if you play it right.