Venting I have to go somewhere from here

[struggles_inc]

I started 2024 with people I considered close.
From January to May I've lost them all.

I was a very sociable person. Always talking. Cheering. Supportive.
I cooked for my friends a lot. I helped with stuff. I listened and comforted.

I can't believe it's all gone down the drain. I talk about it a lot on SaSu, but relations are basically my thing. I've always been a people's person, and I'm suddenly no more. It's a big change.

Funny thing is that I did it all myself. Nobody dumped me. I just started to get disappointed and stopped forgiving. When I stopped forcing a smile, it turned out I have no real friends. I fucking burned all the bridges and there is no regret.

But I have to do something now. I've never been in a situation like that.
Maybe I will take a second attempt at recovery. Try to fix my fucked up health a little. You know, since I have no friend to depend on.

 

[halleyscomet]

I relate to you, I have also lost everything. My cat died, my boyfriend betrayed me so I cut him off, I cut off my friends because I was too depressed to keep things up with people who don't care. I've lost it all. I don't regret what has happened, but I am incredibly alone. Though in this position, I don't know wether I should knuckle down and recover, or just ctb. I'm so used to living my life for other people, being on my own leaves me clueless on what to do. I really do miss having people in my life, the loneliness is suffocating me, but I'd be lonely either way as those people do not care for me.

I just want to be content and at peace.

 

[struggles_inc]

I relate to you, I have also lost everything. My cat died, my boyfriend betrayed me so I cut him off, I cut off my friends because I was too depressed to keep things up with people who don't care. I've lost it all. I don't regret what has happened, but I am incredibly alone. Though in this position, I don't know wether I should knuckle down and recover, or just ctb. I'm so used to living my life for other people, being on my own leaves me clueless on what to do. I really do miss having people in my life, the loneliness is suffocating me, but I'd be lonely either way as those people do not care for me.

I just want to be content and at peace.

I am very sorry about your cat. Sometimes I think animals are only beings worthy of unconditional love and affection. People have to prove themselves worthy — something that your ex failed to do.

I relate to choosing loneliness. It's better to starve than to eat garbage.

 

[halleyscomet]

I am very sorry about your cat. Sometimes I think animals are only beings worthy of unconditional love and affection. People have to prove themselves worthy — something that your ex failed to do.

I relate to choosing loneliness. It's better to starve than to eat garbage.

My cat was genuinely the best being to ever exist. He was a chunky fella, very silly he had pica and would eat everything lol. He was the most loving snuggly little thing. He would cry and get upset when I wouldn't hug him or pet him. He'd follow me around making sure I was okay. When I would get panic attacks he would notice and sit on my chest and purr to calm me down. When I'd cry he'd lick my tears away and let me cuddle him until I'd fall asleep. When I attempted he would sit with me and purr and make sure I was okay. He was a very intelligent and loving cat, there is not a day where I don't miss him.

 

[terra.nuvo]

I relate to losing friends after no longer forcing a smile. I really figured out who my true friends are after my depression set in. I miss the person I used to be though. I used to be a real people person too but all that changed really quickly and I lost a bunch of friends.

It's good to hear that you are choosing to go on the journey of recovery and looking after your health. I wish I had decided to do that early on in the process rather than wallowing in the sadness of losing people and my own self pity.

 

[struggles_inc]

My cat was genuinely the best being to ever exist. He was a chunky fella, very silly he had pica and would eat everything lol. He was the most loving snuggly little thing. He would cry and get upset when I wouldn't hug him or pet him. He'd follow me around making sure I was okay. When I would get panic attacks he would notice and sit on my chest and purr to calm me down. When I'd cry he'd lick my tears away and let me cuddle him until I'd fall asleep. When I attempted he would sit with me and purr and make sure I was okay. He was a very intelligent and loving cat, there is not a day where I don't miss him.

I deeply feel that. I lost my precious 13 y.o. cat to a liver disease in October.
These creatures are loving, like guardian angels. Sometimes when I sleep, I dream of my cat, and after waking I think that she just came from heaven to check on me.

I wish I had decided to do that early on in the process rather than wallowing in the sadness of losing people and my own self pity.

I think it's not too late for you too. I wish you the best, as well as other people on this website. It's still astonishing to me how this page attracts so many empathic people.