I have this weird habit of assuming everyone around me has a life better than me

[DeathIsTheWayOut99]

I know its stupid but hear me out
A lot of times I live in my head instead of reality. I look at the people around me and based on what they say about their lives I get jealous. Jealous that someone has a loving mom. Jealous that someone has close friends. Jealous that someone has a boyfriend. My own hatred clouds me and causes me to recluse form people because I feel I cant relate to them. That in some way they are better and I am a loner in my trauma in my abuse
I probably sound like a broken record....

 

[BipolarGuy]

Generally two things contribute to this:

1. It's what depression does to the way you perceive things
2. People like to give off the impression that their life is perfect, it's very superficial and to do with maintaining an image

 

[JackieInTheBox]

I used to feel that way until I realized there are people who have all that and are still miserable.

 

[Worndown]

You know the problems in your life but are completely unaware of problems in theirs.
No surprise others seem to have a better life.

 

[DeathIsTheWayOut99]

I used to feel that way until I realized there are people who have all that and are still miserable.

that is true

 

[Mm80]

I know its stupid but hear me out
A lot of times I live in my head instead of reality. I look at the people around me and based on what they say about their lives I get jealous. Jealous that someone has a loving mom. Jealous that someone has close friends. Jealous that someone has a boyfriend. My own hatred clouds me and causes me to recluse form people because I feel I cant relate to them. That in some way they are better and I am a loner in my trauma in my abuse
I probably sound like a broken record....

Your not on your own with that one. My instant assumption would be that someone is doing better. I have to conatantly remind myself that most people are full of shit. Social media is particularly bad for it.

 

[nitroautnz]

I know its stupid but hear me out
A lot of times I live in my head instead of reality. I look at the people around me and based on what they say about their lives I get jealous. Jealous that someone has a loving mom. Jealous that someone has close friends. Jealous that someone has a boyfriend. My own hatred clouds me and causes me to recluse form people because I feel I cant relate to them. That in some way they are better and I am a loner in my trauma in my abuse
I probably sound like a broken record....

It's not stupid, I'm like that too, its probably the depression, but the feeling is still here.

 

[voidman]

I know its stupid but hear me out
A lot of times I live in my head instead of reality. I look at the people around me and based on what they say about their lives I get jealous. Jealous that someone has a loving mom. Jealous that someone has close friends. Jealous that someone has a boyfriend. My own hatred clouds me and causes me to recluse form people because I feel I cant relate to them. That in some way they are better and I am a loner in my trauma in my abuse
I probably sound like a broken record....

Totally relate. Especially the part about living in your head and also jealousy. (It sounds preachy) but you're not alone.

 

[Xocoyotziin]

Same. I'm not jealous of people's happiness or lack thereof, or what they have, but I am jealous of who they are.

 

[greebo6]

I know its stupid but hear me out
A lot of times I live in my head instead of reality. I look at the people around me and based on what they say about their lives I get jealous. Jealous that someone has a loving mom. Jealous that someone has close friends. Jealous that someone has a boyfriend. My own hatred clouds me and causes me to recluse form people because I feel I cant relate to them. That in some way they are better and I am a loner in my trauma in my abuse
I probably sound like a broken record....

Its okay to feel like that. I get jealous of other people when their lives include the things I would love to have but never can have. Or they are someone and something I would like to be but never can be.
So its normal and natural.
Its gets much more intense and overwhelming the longer you have to go through it and when you are depressed/lonely/sad and ultimately ,which is why were all here , suicidal.
You are not alone in this struggle though.

 

[joshe]

It's a lack of perspective but i feel exactly the same way.

We almost can't control how we feel about this, it's not our fault, it's just how we are wired

Only the end will provide us with reprieve.

 

[ThrownAwayTom]

This isn't stupid. It's actually how I feel more every day. I used to be convinced that it was in my head, but in recent months I've seen it myself that the close friends I had are no longer interested, and everyone else is somehow able to tick along and enjoy themselves now and then. I've had one serious relationship in my life and the loneliness of knowing it'll never happen again makes me infinitely jealous of the people I see. I try to think the grass isn't always greener etc.

 

[Lost in a Dream]

Funny thing is, if you knew me outside of this forum, but only as an acquaintance (like a co-worker or something), you would probably think that my life is better, but the only reason is that you would not be aware that I am a member of SS and because I hide it so well around other people. I disguise it with humor in the outside world and sometimes I can even fool myself for a few minutes, but the reality is you never know who else is suicidal until they open up about it, but most of them won't.

 

[Worthless_nobody]

I know it sounds petty and stupid (please no one judge) but my jealousy of others lives and the fact my own has been nothing but 1 big trauma dump is one reason why I never leave home. I don't go shopping or to restaurants or anywhere and hardly watch TV even because seeing happy smiling families makes me feel hollow and dead inside. I feel better just reclusing. I literally estranged myself from an entire side of my family because of how wonderful amazing and blessed their lives are compared to mine....they were also those self righteous look at me types too so I was glad to get them out of my life forever.

 

[laura fines]

I know its stupid but hear me out
A lot of times I live in my head instead of reality. I look at the people around me and based on what they say about their lives I get jealous. Jealous that someone has a loving mom. Jealous that someone has close friends. Jealous that someone has a boyfriend. My own hatred clouds me and causes me to recluse form people because I feel I cant relate to them. That in some way they are better and I am a loner in my trauma in my abuse
I probably sound like a broken record....

you are not stupid at all
it is normal feel like that
big hug

 

[Meditation guide]

I know it sounds petty and stupid (please no one judge) but my jealousy of others lives and the fact my own has been nothing but 1 big trauma dump is one reason why I never leave home. I don't go shopping or to restaurants or anywhere and hardly watch TV even because seeing happy smiling families makes me feel hollow and dead inside. I feel better just reclusing.

Same here. I see people living normal happy lives and the contrast with my life is huge.

It's like a little dog spending it's life locked in a tiny cage but can see the other dogs outside running, playing and having fun.

 

[Misfit72]

It's a common problem, which I have, my other problem being that I think successful people don't make mistakes.

 

[Ghost2211]

It's human nature to assume others have it better. It helps to keep perspective that some people have it significantly worse.

 

[Ineedtodie]

If you think that everyone has better life than you then it could be due to chronic depression, low self estime, weak sens of self, anxiety, toxic shame. I know I have that prespective. It sucks. It doesn't have to do with empathy or anything. Maybe you just feel lonely in your struggles more than others.