![gonegal95](/data/avatars/l/98/98639.jpg?1725101958)
gonegal95
Member
- Aug 30, 2024
- 6
It took 16 years of actively wanting to die before I finally letting go the fear. My judgment feels less cloudy, and now I find solstice in CTB, so much that there is no urge to cry out for help. What's in its place is a feeling of focused flow state, ready to take the steps and get this done. I am not crying to anyone. I am just here, thankful for the PPH and other resources. After 16 years.. It is here, the fabled "sign of suicide to look out for"… its acceptance of my fate, disguised as "sudden happiness" to everyone else.