I hate waking up

[Darkover]

I immidiately get hit with reality and all the emotions come in. Every morning... everyday I want to die as soon as I wake up. I forgot what it's like having a good day, another day in this hellhole and shithole there's nothing to live for here

i hate it. the second you wake up you don't realise it but then it hits you, all the pain hits you even harder. waking up, almost the hardest part.

All that I have to do to tend to the basic human needs once more.
Living and being dragged by the same misery over and over. Once more.

 

[Forever Sleep]

I completely relate. The first feeling I get is dread and a very long- 'oh nooooooo- not again.'

 

[WAITING TO DIE]

Yes, it's awful.
I always get a horrible feeling in my stomach the moment I wake up.
It's a mixture of both fear and dread.

 

[RichardFirst]

Have you ever had the experience of waking from a truly unpleasant dream, feeling a brief sense of relief only to realise that the reality of the situation that you're in isn't much better? It would be amusing were it not so sad.

 

[Meditation guide]

You described my waking moments perfectly. A huge weight of misery comes over me the instant I wake up. It's horrible. Another day I have to get through somehow. Imagine going to sleep knowing you won't wake up again, how great that would be.

 

[1legger]

Exactly every dream every nightmare seems pleasant compared to when I wake up. Losing a vital limb isn't that bad but when I get any idea of something I want to do I realize how hard it actually is to complete in a wheelchair. So I just end up giving up most days and my best moments are walking or running in a dream or nightmare so I try to sleep as much as possible.

 

[FuneralCry]

I do as well, simply just being conscious and aware makes me wish for eternal non-existence, only the absence of everything is perfection to me. It's a curse to have the ability to exist in this dreadful reality where we cannot easily find permanent peace from this existence.

 

[nood11]

My favorite part of the day is when I'm about to go to sleep. My worst part of the day is waking up yet again. Another day of using the bathroom, eating, drinking, cleaning, exercising, shopping etc. What is the point?! Life feels like pure joyless drudgery.

 

[Xaeniak]

Cosign on it being the worst part of the day.

I'm curious, do other people not experience the unpleasantness of living while they're dreaming? I always thought it was weird that I'm not depressed in my dreams, but it sounds like it's maybe more common than I thought

 

[tiredone]

Every morning feels exactly same as described by you lot. I still have almost 11 days to my planned date. I wish i could end it earlier or it ends by itself.

 

[sserafim]

Same, I hate waking up. I'm always disappointed that I didn't die in my sleep. I hate the sunrise and morning because it's just a reminder that it's the dawn of a new day, and I have to live yet another day and do this life thing all over again. I hate how the same day repeats, it's honestly like I'm living in a weird simulation. It's dystopian, living the same day on repeat, and super boring as well. I'm just a shut-in/hiki and I don't even work or have a job because I failed to launch after college. I can't imagine working for 50 years, and doing the same shit everyday. I'd rather kill myself! It just sounds like such an unfulfilling and meaningless existence. I don't know how "normal" people do it or put up with it.

I hate how the sun inevitably rises and sets, and how the cycle repeats again and again. I hate how I have to do the little mundane things just to survive (like eat and drink, etc). Honestly I wish I could die in my sleep so I'd never have to wake up again. I hate the mundaneness of existence, it's honestly just so boring and repetitive.

 

[avaruus]

I relate, especially because i always wake up feeling so groggy, irritated and dehydrated. The last time i woke up feeling refreshed, was back in primary school

 

[sserafim]

My favorite part of the day is when I'm about to go to sleep. My worst part of the day is waking up yet again. Another day of using the bathroom, eating, drinking, cleaning, exercising, shopping etc. What is the point?! Life feels like pure joyless drudgery.

Same! I look forward to going to sleep, it's my fav time of the day. I wish I could live in my dreams instead of reality. There really is no point to life. I completely agree, life is just pointless and mundane. It really feels like drudgery

 

[nood11]

Same, I hate waking up. I'm always disappointed that I didn't die in my sleep. I hate the sunrise and morning because it's just a reminder that it's the dawn of a new day, and I have to live yet another day and do this life thing all over again. I hate how the same day repeats, it's honestly like I'm living in a weird simulation. It's dystopian, living the same day on repeat, and super boring as well. I'm just a shut-in/hiki and I don't even work or have a job because I failed to launch after college. I can't imagine working for 50 years, and doing the same shit everyday. I'd rather kill myself! It just sounds like such an unfulfilling and meaningless existence. I don't know how "normal" people do it or put up with it.

I hate how the sun inevitably rises and sets, and how the cycle repeats again and again. I hate how I have to do the little mundane things just to survive (like eat and drink, etc). Honestly I wish I could die in my sleep so I'd never have to wake up again. I hate the mundaneness of existence, it's honestly just so boring and repetitive.

I agree completely. Having to fill these 24 hour periods over and over and over is so difficult. There's so much mundane stuff to do every day just to maintain existence that I don't want. This life seems totally pointless, meaningless, and purposeless.

 

[spinningmyself]

Yes it is the same for me as well, the best part of my day is going to sleep. I do not dream, as far as I can tell which is great to me. I feel if I did dream it would only be nightmares.

 

[DEATH IS FREEDOM]

A courageous action is required to escape the hell of life.

 

[sserafim]

A courageous action is required to escape the hell of life.

I wish that it weren't so hard to escape…

 

[Meditation guide]

When it's so difficult to do anything, arranging and planning to ctb also seems almost impossible.

I can think of about two six month periods in my life that were more happy or at least not as bad. The rest has been more or less horrible.

 

[voyager]

Yesss, first thought is usually "not this shit again". Especially, when having a nice dream. Don't recall my dreams too often, but when I do I feel kinda normal in them. Don't have anhedonia there for instance and actually feel things the way I used to before this whole ordeal. It's lovely. I think that's the lizard brain @Xaeniak, nature's way of making things bearable.

Otoh, have also had full blown insomnia at times were I can't sleep more than an hour or two, no matter how hard I try, and earlier this year went through several months of having to go to the toilet like 5+ times per night (nocturia), in such situations the night is dark and full of terror™ and pretty long too.

 

[leavingsoon99]

Waking up every morning is so hard. Especially when I realize that I'm not living for anything. For me, this life is hollow. The idea of love is better than actually pursuing it from someone. The idea of working is better than actually going to work at a job I fucking hate. All for what? To meet basic human needs. I hate this so much.

 

[doneforlife]

Waking up every morning is so hard. Especially when I realize that I'm not living for anything. For me, this life is hollow. The idea of love is better than actually pursuing it from someone. The idea of working is better than actually going to work at a job I fucking hate. All for what? To meet basic human needs. I hate this so much.

I wish everyone had the right to painless exit so that as per your skills you can decide whether you have the potential to turn things around or let it go. Forcing and mandating should not be done.