reismisery
existing is tiring
- Jun 10, 2023
- 13
i hate how suicide is seen as selfish by so many people. it's not fair at all. a lot of suicidal people have mental illnesses and terrible lives that they usually don't have control over. people say things such as "think of the family" when you have no idea how someone's home life is like. there are times where i wish that i was not the way i am or had the life i did, but i don't have control over such things. it not the way that i'm living that is making me depressed, it's the life i was born with in the start. i have always felt hopeless but now the hopelessness has turned into something so much more severe. my existence is coming to an end and reaching out for help seems useless. i have went to multiple psychologists and been on many different medications. none which have worked very well. i've been lonely and alone most of my life either it be physically or mentally. religion has also been making me so much more suicidal and i know that sounds strange, but for me, i feel as if i cannot have any freedom whatsoever or be myself with the religion i was born with. it doesn't necessarily mean my religion itself is terrible, but my life as a religious person has made me worst and i don't know why. i am suffering in silence everyday no matter how many signs i give to people. people don't actually care. they just say suicide is selfish and judge people with mental illness and depression without thinking how terrible life is for them. the only selfish people are the ones saying suicide is selfish because all we have ever wanted was happiness but we don't have it. we don't all have perfect families or perfect lives. i truly hate society and humanity. i hate this world.