Venting i hate being a girl/feminine

[Arachne]

I absolutely hate being a girl. I don't feel like i relate to other women I've always struggled to make girl friends or just meaningful relationships with other women including my own family, i dont know why and i feel like i cant talk about how i feel about it since people throw around the term "pick me" all the time, when i even try to say how i feel its always my fault and maybe it is but i dont think im special or im 'not like other girls.' I don't feel like a guy either i do NOT believe im transgender i just feel horribly uncomfortable with my feminity i hate having feminine interests (even though i do) i hate having crushes or being in relationships despite the fact i want a relationship i just hate feeling soft or feminine feelings. i apoligize for any grammar mistakes or if this feels jumbled or hard to read im no writer im just expressing my emotions candidly.

 

[sunny]

I absolutely hate being a girl. I don't feel like i relate to other women I've always struggled to make girl friends or just meaningful relationships with other women including my own family, i dont know why and i feel like i cant talk about how i feel about it since people throw around the term "pick me" all the time, when i even try to say how i feel its always my fault and maybe it is but i dont think im special or im 'not like other girls.' I don't feel like a guy either i do NOT believe im transgender i just feel horribly uncomfortable with my feminity i hate having feminine interests (even though i do) i hate having crushes or being in relationships despite the fact i want a relationship i just hate feeling soft or feminine feelings. i apoligize for any grammar mistakes or if this feels jumbled or hard to read im no writer im just expressing my emotions candidly.

i relate to this so much u are not alone, this is very real to me and i'm glad someone feels the same way.

 

[not_telling]

I think I know what you're talking about. If so, I'm very sorry you've had to live that way. I'm a guy but I hate everything about it, most of all my body. In my case tho, I think maybe I'm trans? I don't know really and don't want to even try getting into that discussion with my own mind because I'm already trying to die as it is now, I don't want more problems. But having to learn how to please society by doing things I hate because of my gender causes such agony and despise of myself, and other too sometimes. I just want to do the thing I like, wether they be cute or macho or delicate or rough or whatever. Such a dumb thing to desire so badly, it doesn't even make sense that I have to desire it deeply, it should just be normal, you know? Hope you can find something that feels better for you, OP. Whatever that may be.

 

[nolifezzz]

hey im exactly like you!
tbh yeah there were times it made me feel quite dysphoric i use to went as any pronouns though now im not so sure anymore. and yeah the pickme name callings got to me a little bit much too and made me too afraid to do anything my whole life lol the severe social anxiety, paranoia & constant want to be accepted or seen as normal by society/blending in, hate being seen as the bad gossiped person, didnt help. i end up never doing anything meaningful with my life or doing things i truly want to do. except for gaming i guess lol.
even in my daydreams, fictional fantasy scenarios i create & play everyday in my head to pass the time i always imagine myself as a guy lol....as some guy character. the most coolest guy ever according to my ideals. only recently i start being comfortable imagining myself as i am.
i used to truly hate all things feminine too, especially in my childhood i think in those times i genuinely think i was a boy lol(?) i used to get mistaken a lot as a boy too as a child (was it the short hair androgynous face the robots or batman costume? not sure lol) i hate it when my parents put me in a dress, put me in a skirt, all things girly and pink, hate it when they bought me barbie dolls & girly toys, id cry and throw tantrums heck theres a family picture in my house of my parents and all the children when we were kids all smiling (its a professional studio photo kinda thing) then theres me little angry hateful face because my mom had made all of us wear lipstick for the pic lol! course mine was the only one that was smudged in the pic.
and the funny thing is i have no idea why im like this, why i despised being a girl, being feminine, so much. i was still a child and where i live things like these gender identity etc. are not talked about or practically inexistent, theres absolutely noone and nothing i could learn this 'bad' behavior from lol so all the fake scare the internet bigots be spouting about children getting brainwashed by lgbt propaganda or some bs definitely doesnt apply to me lol.
this personal experience of mine made me absolutely sure that that yeah this is just something that some people were born with, not some 'made up trend'. relationships also used to make me cringe.
im not even close to figuring myself out just yet but i guess all im saying is you're definitely not alone in this and its not wrong or weird. take your time & figure yourself out slowly, and those name callers can piss off and mind their own petty ass fucking business!!

 

[Brown-Jacket Revy]

Being born female feels like a cosmic joke.

 

[theslasher]

Hey, careful what you wish for. It isn't easy being a man. No one cares about you or your mental health as a man. It's like your whole self worth depends on what you have achieved or how much material success you have. It is what it is. If you're not in the top 10% of men no one gives a flying fuck. I remember meeting my ex girlfriend's friend group and it was a complete culture shock seeing how emotionally supportive everyone was. It made no sense to me bc it was something I've never seen or experienced before. My life couldn't have been more different than hers :(
But you see, now I feel like a pussy for complaining, shits wack bruh.

i just feel horribly uncomfortable with my feminity i hate having feminine interests (even though i do) i hate having crushes or being in relationships despite the fact i want a relationship i just hate feeling soft or feminine feelings

Based on the way you described your family earlier it seems like you've had to "put up a fence" in a way, like you can't ever just be yourself or speak your mind. I don't think anyone would find it easy to fall back into their feminine nature in an environment like the one you described.
Idk you, but from one person to another I wish you the best.

 

[Forever Sleep]

I do relate to you. I've never strongly identified with femininity. I don't exactly hate being female and I don't particularly want to be male either. Although- I'd be thrilled to be free of periods. I just always hated femininity- even as a child. I'm glad that we at least live in an era when we don't have to comply so strictly to gender. I've always enjoyed being a tomboy- although I have to say- I felt more accepted when I flirted with femininity briefly when I had an obsessive crush on a guy and wanted to impress him.

 

[YandereMikuMistress]

I get this,
I know it can feel different for everyone of course, and i really dont wanna possibly make what you feel seem less in any way, i just wanted to share my opinion, since, from the bottom of my heart,, I really do understand that "hate"
,,
Unbelievably.

That fucking hate i feel,, the last thing I want is for it to be disregarded,, but just as I yearn for that,
It's not possible from what it seems,
It's as tho I will always be,
below.

 

[VidFlumina]

I absolutely hate being a girl. I don't feel like i relate to other women I've always struggled to make girl friends or just meaningful relationships with other women including my own family, i dont know why and i feel like i cant talk about how i feel about it since people throw around the term "pick me" all the time, when i even try to say how i feel its always my fault and maybe it is but i dont think im special or im 'not like other girls.' I don't feel like a guy either i do NOT believe im transgender i just feel horribly uncomfortable with my feminity i hate having feminine interests (even though i do) i hate having crushes or being in relationships despite the fact i want a relationship i just hate feeling soft or feminine feelings. i apoligize for any grammar mistakes or if this feels jumbled or hard to read im no writer im just expressing my emotions candidly.

I also dislike being a woman. What helped me is realizing that I don't have to be feminine despite being a woman. So I no longer trying to act and appear this way, because for me it feels silly. I don't own a skirt, dress or high heels. I don't own nail polish or make-up except for chap stick and foundation because of the skin damage I got from shit my dermatologist prescribed me, but I rarely ever use it. I wear cheap comfortable clothes, I am not trying to look good for anyone. I only shave armpits. When something bothers me I speak up, instead of trying to keep the peace at all costs. I feel better this way than to try to fit in at all cost.
Honestly I didn't struggle with making girl friends, maybe because I met on my path many nerdy girls which were similar to me in lots of ways. Maybe try to befriend nerds? Many of them also have stereotypically feminine interest. You could connect over this.
I don't think you're a pick me. Pick mes are women who do would do anything for a man, who always make excuses for them and would throw other women under the bus because they see them as less worthy. I don't think you see women as less worthy, just femininity, which is okay in my opinion.

 

[noSuffering]

I absolutely hate being a girl.

When a woman justifies her weakness, stupidity, sociality and cowardice by saying "Well, I'm a woman!", then gradually the word "woman" becomes synonymous with weakness, stupidity, sociality and cowardice. You want to be strong, smart, single and brave, so you hate being a woman. And it is right. But from the point of view of formal accuracy, it is more correct to formulate "I hate weakness, stupidity, sociality and cowardice (and women who justify these qualities in themselves by the fact that they are women)." I know it sounds longer, but it's more accurate.

Will you choose physics and mathematics instead of psychology? Are you more interested in the structure of a computer than the relationships between people? Would you choose a wrench over a pet? Will you choose regular pull-ups instead of yoga? Do you think that beauty is not in cosmetics, but in abs? Will you choose running sneakers and jeans instead of a dress? Will you choose loneliness over a relationship? Will you choose a solo trip to the mountains with a backpack and a tent instead of relaxing at sea? There is no need to answer, you already understand the meaning.

I write this because almost all women cause nothing but contempt, they are pathetic, and therefore for many years I have kept in my mind the image of a woman who does not agree to be like everyone else. I've never seen one like this.