lackadazeE

lackadazeE

Member
Jul 29, 2023
32
This is my first post. I'm not sure if I'm doing it right. I hope I am, otherwise this night will get a lot worse. My school forced everyone to sign up for a mandatory community service event. My job was to do face painting and ever since it was announced I've been freaking out because I knew what would happen. I'm currently hiding out on a bench crying because I had a panic attack due to the crowds. It was so loud and when I approached the booth (of which I was not given proper directions to) it was surrounded by a horde of people. The barn was very hot and I immediately started hyperventilating. I want to leave but we were forced to wear recognizable shirts and If they catch my leaving I will be in huge trouble. I shouldn't have come. It'd be the same outcome of me getting in trouble either way. I was contemplating jumping in front of a car rather than actually going to this event. But now I'm stuck here for two hours. It's honestly such bullshit. I'm 18 and I shouldn't be forced to do any of this. But the teacher's were yelling at people who said they wouldn't come and I thought I could be alright enough to actually go. I was wrong of course I was. I know it's stupid to be upset about any of this but I can't help it.
 
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KarmicRain

KarmicRain

Member
Mar 27, 2023
62
It sounds like hell. It's so fucking stupid that it's mandatory. Being upset at a situation like this is normal, don't let anyone berate you just for having human emotions. The fact we have to forcibly regulate them to pretend shit's okay all the time is just unbearable.
 
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todiefor

todiefor

Scrap that, nothing matters at all after all
Jun 24, 2023
474
I'm so sorry you are in this situation, it sounds very upsetting. Could you call someone to come get you? We are here to chat if you need to kill some time. Stay where you are where you feel safe, don't do anything rash in the moment.
 
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lackadazeE

lackadazeE

Member
Jul 29, 2023
32
I'm so sorry you are in this situation, it sounds very upsetting. Could you call someone to come get you? We are here to chat if you need to kill some time. Stay where you are where you feel safe, don't do anything rash in the moment.
I drove here myself and I don't have anyone to rely on right now. I could possibly reach out to a teacher but at the moment my head hurts too much to even want to approach anyone and I'm scared they'll get mad at me. Thank you for replying. It would be lovely to talk a bit. I definitely need a distraction from everything.
 
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todiefor

todiefor

Scrap that, nothing matters at all after all
Jun 24, 2023
474
Ueah
I drove here myself and I don't have anyone to rely on right now. I could possibly reach out to a teacher but at the moment my head hurts too much to even want to approach anyone and I'm scared they'll get mad at me. Thank you for replying. It would be lovely to talk a bit. I definitely need a distraction from everything.
don't forget to drink water if your head hurts, and vent away. I'm sorry your teachers seem very irresponsible and not caring of their student's welfare. That really sucks.
 
lackadazeE

lackadazeE

Member
Jul 29, 2023
32
Ueah

don't forget to drink water if your head hurts, and vent away. I'm sorry your teachers seem very irresponsible and not caring of their student's welfare. That really sucks.
I have been drinking water, though I did just run out so that sucks. As for the teachers they probably thought everyone was just normal enough to not get overwhelmed by something that was hyped up as fun. I can't wait to get home and go to sleep. I have to wake up early tomorrow to take a college placement test and I know I'm gonna be exhausted when I get home and when I wake up in the morning. This week is going horribly and the weekend can't come fast enough. I'm gonna have my first therapy session in seven months tomorrow too so I'll get to talk about everything as well. I'm very thankful for you and this community it's so amazing how happy it has made me to find like minded individuals.
 
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lament.

lament.

the Immortal
Jun 28, 2023
174
This is absolutely horrible, this type of thing should never be mandatory. Teacher is an asshole for shouting at people like that for not wanting to come. I know you don't want to get yelled at but you should probably just up and leave, your mental health is more important and even more so if you having something important to do tomorrow. Personally I would leave and make up a lie if I was called out on it after, something like you got a call from a family member who got hurt or sick, etc.
 
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todiefor

todiefor

Scrap that, nothing matters at all after all
Jun 24, 2023
474
I have been drinking water, though I did just run out so that sucks. As for the teachers they probably thought everyone was just normal enough to not get overwhelmed by something that was hyped up as fun. I can't wait to get home and go to sleep. I have to wake up early tomorrow to take a college placement test and I know I'm gonna be exhausted when I get home and when I wake up in the morning. This week is going horribly and the weekend can't come fast enough. I'm gonna have my first therapy session in seven months tomorrow too so I'll get to talk about everything as well. I'm very thankful for you and this community it's so amazing how happy it has made me to find like minded individuals.
Maybe you can say u r not feeling well maybe dehydrated or something so you can go home early and prep for your placement test tomorrow. Surely they can't say no to that. These events can be very overwhelming i remember them at school, so many people screaming, it's definitely a stressful situation.

Great that you have a therapy session :) I hope it goes well
 
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BoredomSeeker

BoredomSeeker

"A black light bulb. The repression of an idea."
May 25, 2023
100
This is my first post. I'm not sure if I'm doing it right. I hope I am, otherwise this night will get a lot worse. My school forced everyone to sign up for a mandatory community service event. My job was to do face painting and ever since it was announced I've been freaking out because I knew what would happen. I'm currently hiding out on a bench crying because I had a panic attack due to the crowds. It was so loud and when I approached the booth (of which I was not given proper directions to) it was surrounded by a horde of people. The barn was very hot and I immediately started hyperventilating. I want to leave but we were forced to wear recognizable shirts and If they catch my leaving I will be in huge trouble. I shouldn't have come. It'd be the same outcome of me getting in trouble either way. I was contemplating jumping in front of a car rather than actually going to this event. But now I'm stuck here for two hours. It's honestly such bullshit. I'm 18 and I shouldn't be forced to do any of this. But the teacher's were yelling at people who said they wouldn't come and I thought I could be alright enough to actually go. I was wrong of course I was. I know it's stupid to be upset about any of this but I can't help it.
I can relate to this, I have very bad anxiety around people I don't know and situations I'm not familiar with. I used to have to do similar shit back in school and it was just a worse experience each time as my anxiety worsened. You'd think my parents might've been clued in that something was wrong fairly early on, when I had a panic attack once because I had to talk to the person behind the cash register when I was around 12 or 13, but instead it's a 'funny' story my dad brought up a few times. Anyway, I'm sorry you are going through this, it really sucks, and those without these struggles won't understand most of the time. I wish you all the best.
 
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FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
38,921
It must be dreadful being trapped in that situation, I see it as being so cruel how people are forced to do things like that but anyway best wishes, I hope that if possible you find relief from your suffering, crowds are really awful to me as well.
 

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