I had 3 nightmares in 1 sleep after planning to CTB yesterday

[Asphyxiater]

I shit you not, I just had 3 hellish nightmares in 1 sleep. It's currently 5:37 AM, I went to sleep in 3:11 AM.

The first dream starts with my drunk brother IRL that somehow got into my dream and lay on my sister's bed. He was screaming and being chaotic at 3 AM, so my sister and I got out of the room. He proceeds and tries to push down our portable clothe storage and tried to kill himself in front of me. It turns out, I was the one hallucinating. When he got into our room, he just collapsed to the floor. I was apparently so sleepy I hallucinated those things, and it freaked me out.

The second dream was a continuation in which he threw a birthday party at our house with our old high school classmates. It was nice to see them, but I had to go to bathroom and brush my teeth. After that, I was just there masturbating for some reason. Then my two tall high school classmates entered the bathroom, I don't know how since it was locked. They didn't mind me masturbating but I stopped and proceed to brush my teeth again. After a while, I left. End of second dream.

The third dream, oh boy. This is the final continuation. After I left the bathroom, I was about to head to my computer desk when I saw a package of cocaine hat my big cousin brought. I was like "Where did you get that?" The didn't answer. At this point the party was still going, but somehow my uncle, aunt, and cousins got involved. Almost everyone was naked and high. Curious, I tried some but with just my finger tip and snorted it. I sat on the couch, and... Time slowed down. My vision was becoming gloomy and everyone was becoming in a slow-motion state. It was the most surreal experience I ever had in a dream. It's the closest I ever gotten to somewhat using drugs in my life. After that, I blacked out. I went to the bathroom and saw my reflection. My nose now had 1 hole and my Iris was green. My tongue was green like it's dying because of an infection. I was freaking out, so I watched a video about cocaine overdose and a voice of a female said I had 18 minutes to live. I didn't wanna die in a horrible way, so I took out an Ethernet cable and tried to kill myself in the bathroom, but I couldn't because there were people inside for some reason.

Then I woke up. I was planning to kill myself today after I made the decision yesterday. I really think this is not a coincidence. This is the scariest nightmare I have ever experienced just because of the hallucination I had in the dream and how it felt so real. This is probably the 2nd most life-like hallucination after sleep paralysis. I still can't believe how real it felt.

 

[CandyK__]

To me it seems like the state you're in currently is quote bad. I believe those nightmares are manifestation of your emotions.

1 – The brother trying to kill himself might be a self-insert for you're urges, and inability to express yourself, to others, while being perceived as chaotic. From this it appears that you're lonely, abandoned perhaps, as you did you brother in the dream.

2 – A sense of social awkwardness, and escapism from social life, in favor of pleasure inducing solo activities. The schoolmates opening closed doors might represent insecurity, as doors were unreliable, this might be paranoia-esqe sense of lack of control over you're life, and further attempt to fit in within people who surround you.

3 – "Naked and high" might be a call to polar opposite form first dream of brother attempting his life, where those people were enjoying their life, with no cloths which symbolize freedom, or lack of boundaries, then it would be a call back to opening of closed doors.
Trying said drug is again an attempt of fitting in, yet blacking out shows that you're not really you when trying to fit in. The next symptoms, I think are just a sort of price for attempting to not being you, I guess.
Then when you know you'll die out of given circumstances, still you attempts not to be subordinate to fate inflicted upon you, but try to regain control by CTBing, yourself. And the people watching is maybe sense of being watched and judged on every decision you make.

To me it seems that you don't feel in charge of your own life, as you try to fit in with others.
Sorry for going Freud on you. It probably doesn't come close to what you're currently going through, but this is just how I'd interpret this. But I know nothing about you're real life, so it might be just a bunch of cheap-psychoanalysis bullshit.

I was planning to kill myself today after I made the decision yesterday.

Don't rush with anything there is time for everything, and CTB should be your last resort, when you've tried everything else.

 

[Asphyxiater]

To me it seems like the state you're in currently is quote bad. I believe those nightmares are manifestation of your emotions.

1 – The brother trying to kill himself might be a self-insert for you're urges, and inability to express yourself, to others, while being perceived as chaotic. From this it appears that you're lonely, abandoned perhaps, as you did you brother in the dream.

2 – A sense of social awkwardness, and escapism from social life, in favor of pleasure inducing solo activities. The schoolmates opening closed doors might represent insecurity, as doors were unreliable, this might be paranoia-esqe sense of lack of control over you're life, and further attempt to fit in within people who surround you.

3 – "Naked and high" might be a call to polar opposite form first dream of brother attempting his life, where those people were enjoying their life, with no cloths which symbolize freedom, or lack of boundaries, then it would be a call back to opening of closed doors.
Trying said drug is again an attempt of fitting in, yet blacking out shows that you're not really you when trying to fit in. The next symptoms, I think are just a sort of price for attempting to not being you, I guess.
Then when you know you'll die out of given circumstances, still you attempts not to be subordinate to fate inflicted upon you, but try to regain control by CTBing, yourself. And the people watching is maybe sense of being watched and judged on every decision you make.

To me it seems that you don't feel in charge of your own life, as you try to fit in with others.
Sorry for going Freud on you. It probably doesn't come close to what you're currently going through, but this is just how I'd interpret this. But I know nothing about you're real life, so it might be just a bunch of cheap-psychoanalysis bullshit.

Don't rush with anything there is time for everything, and CTB should be your last resort, when you've tried everything else.

You're right about my emotions being manifested into my nightmare. It's so disturbing that I dreamt this after the day of my supposed CTBing, I feel like God is trying to tell me something. What's even weirder is that it I was dreaming this for 2 hours, I never had 3 dreams in 1 sleep and it felt so real. Thanks for the analysis

 

[qwerty1969]

I have these sort of dreams every single night. It never stops.