I get verbally attacked everywhere I go........

[IsThisTheEnd?]

Yep, another thread from me, I seem to get verbally attacked everywhere I go, I feel like a rat scampering in the darkness trying to avoid the people the next person I come into contact with is going to chase me away.

 

[Life_and_Death]

Yeah I feel the same way. Work, school, here. Everyone hates me.

 

[IsThisTheEnd?]

Well I'm a loner but I start new situations being polite and helpful but they all end in disaster, my country is very brash and I just end up shuffling away having to find somewhere else to do it all-over again, god it's so hard.

 

[Life_and_Death]

I'll be your friend :)

 

[IsThisTheEnd?]

;) thanks maybe that's the problem I don't want friends but I don't want abuse etc

 

[Life_and_Death]

Well if you ever want someone to talk to just send me a message :) I promise to not be mean hugs

 

[Kassender]

Me too.

Everywhere.
I can't get out of my place without getting insulted one way or the other.

By cashiers or random passer bys.

I remember when i was 6 or 7 i got invited to a birthday party. I got to be the laughing stock of the other kids all afternoon.
At a certain point one of the neighboors showed up with a cake and i commented it looked tasty.

She just lashed out at me, i never understood why, but it made everyone else laugh real hard. I never forgot how proud of herself she looked.
The birthday boy never spoke to me again.
(I should mention i don't blame him,
as i ended up freaking out.
But who wouldn't have.)

There was also this college year where the librairian had a clear problem with me.
She was friendly with everyone but so cold towards me.

I could go on and on, but my life has been mostly experiences like that.

Come to think of it, the attackers were mostly women.
I guess i must creep them out or something because most of them are really aggressive by default with me.

The issue is, i have realized it's instinct.
I just creep people out.


I discussed it in here and someone said
"Random people behave as if i had personaly insulted them on some deep level with my existense"
I couldn't have described it better.
Teachers, other kids, students...

I think the worst is, no one believes you.
You must be an asshole, or they wouldn't treat you this way.

I mean, i suck but i always made a point like you to be polite and not (intentonally) treat people like shit.
No one ever returned the favor.

This is one of my main reasons for ctb.

I know this is 'Recovery', but i don't think there is any changing it anymore.

I'm weak and the others prey upon me.
That's just life.

 

[IsThisTheEnd?]

WoW most of mine are from a adult age and with males witch is one thing most people can't understand as they say it's quite childish and again people won't believe me or I must be some kind of A-hole that deserves it.

so I do some research because this is haunting me and some reddit says it's because your nice to people, I have tried playing the other-way once or twice and then I'm some kind of beast or something.

but from another thread I want an explanation thread, say you did creep people out or something, I find you could pay the best shrink or doctors and they still can't tell you why???

 

[Deleted member 17949]

Definitely feel the same at times. It's important to find spaces that are safe and comfortable for you. Nothing is worse than feeling like everywhere is a danger zone.

 

[IsThisTheEnd?]

I'm probably stuck in-between I'm not posh but wouldn't say I'm ignorant, I not this and not that, never fitting in. I don't know and probably no one knows, I've know alot of sick people and feel some kind of connection but I'm not really ill so not quite like that, I want to give up but I also want to see the end, the house in the woods away blah blah it goes on and on and never ends xxx

I wonder if we all met would we feel at home?

 

[Rollo]

Verbally attack them back then. That's how world is, people attack you and you either fight back or allow yourself to be victimized.

 

[IsThisTheEnd?]

Verbally attack them back then. That's how world is, people attack you and you either fight back or allow yourself to be victimized.

I can't get the balance right I might be told I go to far and loose my job or they might gang up on me etc I
I suppose I always take it for so long then I'll loose my temper and it's time to move on again.

 

[Rollo]

I can't get the balance right I might be told I go to far and loose my job or they might gang up on me etc I
I suppose I always take it for so long then I'll loose my temper and it's time to move on again.

Right balance is you talking back, insulting back and shouting back when somebody disapproves, insults or raises voice at you. Regardless of their reasons. They went too far already. Crossed the line. Even if you lose your job or they gang up on you - I think dignity costs more. Just be flat out cruel to them. Here you play nice where you shouldn't play nice, allow yourself to be victimized, offence and anger builds up and then you lose your temper. Instead of being rough to them, putting them in their place and keeping your integrity intact.

 

[Commitmentphile101]

I can't get the balance right I might be told I go to far and loose my job or they might gang up on me etc I
I suppose I always take it for so long then I'll loose my temper and it's time to move on again.

Sorry, but why can you not report this to higher authority. And if higher authority takes the piss why not go further legally with harassment and abuse claim?

 

[IsThisTheEnd?]

Sorry, but why can you not report this to higher authority. And if higher authority takes the piss why not go further legally with harassment and abuse claim?

I suppose it might be an option but it's usually not worth the trouble or would causes more problems.
I'm obviously not right or something, I don't know, part of the reason I'm here.

I'm here because I'm some kind of outsider, I don't like people anymore and they don't like me
Somethings not right, doesn't add up and Doctors, shrinks can't tell me what it is. Yes I can carry on but ill be jeered or something and it's tierring and depressing.