cloudgazer25

cloudgazer25

a dead girl pretending to be alive
Jan 30, 2020
22
My method has always been and always will be jumping off of a bridge. I have no issue ruing my life but I wont ruin my family's by dying in my childhood home. SN is cheap and easy to get, I understand. And maybe its just me, but the thought of any of my family members finding me blue makes me sick. How do you get past that? I would rather cause myself immeasurable pain that do that to my grandma.
 
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Deleted member 13227

Deleted member 13227

Good night
Dec 21, 2019
71
You don't need to do it in your home, you can book a hotel room and do it there.
 
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E

edward77

Member
Dec 20, 2019
67
even if u jump or use any other method u will be found one day or the other
 
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voyager

voyager

Don't you dare go hollow...
Nov 25, 2019
965
Well, you could always prepare the maid by something in the doorway, left messages, or delayed emails to outside authorities. I'm not completely on board with SN, but jumping off a bridge is probably one thing you won't see me to do. I have no faith in the heighth of most to do the job properly, and someone will find the mess too, so it's really not that different.
 
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cloudgazer25

cloudgazer25

a dead girl pretending to be alive
Jan 30, 2020
22
even if u jump or use any other method u will be found one day or the other

Hmm..thats true..I think I forget about that part. I think I just imagine I sink to the bottom but yeah thats not likely.
 
saintives

saintives

Member
Dec 23, 2019
38
imo when you make excuses it means you wanna live maybe you should reconsider? i have no qualms about going for example and idc if im found
 
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Lastsauce

Lastsauce

Experienced
Dec 22, 2019
258
Book a nice hotel room and you could also schedule an e-mail to emergency services so it will be cops/EMTs who will find you.
 
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voyager

voyager

Don't you dare go hollow...
Nov 25, 2019
965
imo when you make excuses it means you wanna live maybe you should reconsider? i have no qualms about going for example and idc if im found
Well, not wanting others, but in particular loved ones, to find you in that state is not an excuse though, just common decency.
 
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dioxide

dioxide

Member
Dec 6, 2019
59
My method has always been and always will be jumping off of a bridge. I have no issue ruing my life but I wont ruin my family's by dying in my childhood home. SN is cheap and easy to get, I understand. And maybe its just me, but the thought of any of my family members finding me blue makes me sick. How do you get past that? I would rather cause myself immeasurable pain that do that to my grandma.

Yes, instead seeing a body splat on a mortuary is much better for your grandma!

Sarcarm apart, i think the hotel is a better option. Room maids do not enter in night, they come to clean in the morning, but if there is the tag "do not disturb" they will skip for a cycle.
 
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cosmicpixiedust

cosmicpixiedust

Pixie
Jun 5, 2019
972
My plan is essentially to book a hotel room, put the Do Not Disturb sign on the door and go at a reasonable hour to sleep so it will not arise suspicion. Then use a curtain to block the view of me and the door if/when it opens. Put up a sign explaining that I ctb and how, so it will sort of prepare the people who first find me.
 
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saintives

saintives

Member
Dec 23, 2019
38
Well, not wanting others, but in particular loved ones, to find you in that state is not an excuse though, just common decency.


i guess idgaf about my supposed loved ones they were not so loving when i was alive lol sorry if it comes from bitterness
 
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voyager

voyager

Don't you dare go hollow...
Nov 25, 2019
965
i guess idgaf about my supposed loved ones they were not so loving when i was alive lol sorry if it comes from bitterness

Yeah, don't worry about it. Understand what you mean and don't care that much either, as long as it isn't my mum finding me.
 
ALittleBurden

ALittleBurden

Tens of personalities wearing one trench coat
Aug 19, 2019
105
If it's just a matter of people you know finding you, you can go any place where there aren't many people hanging around (that's what I'm personally planning). One can also go to some desolate place with no people at all if it is an option. Maybe wildlife will make you disappear forever, or maybe someone will find you but then it will be some stranger and your corpse probably won't look like a person anymore, so I guess it's bit less traumatic.
 
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H

HopeDiesLast

self-banned
Dec 28, 2019
254
Another thing to consider: If you jump and ANYBODY sees you do it, it will trigger a HUGE emergency response and search and rescue/recovery effort involving multiple agencies.

A quiet suicide in a hotel room likely wouldn't even be disclosed to the public...but a bridge jumper and subsequent recovery operation is sure to trigger media coverage. Your grandma probably wouldn't care for that too much, I imagine.
 
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Lastsauce

Lastsauce

Experienced
Dec 22, 2019
258
If you can't stand nausea and vomiting you might want to pass SN.
The concentrated SN solution is so irritating it will most likely make you vomit even if you take the recommended anti-emetics (meto).
Your heart will also start racing when your blood can't anymore deliver enough oxygen to your body and that might make some people panic.
 
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MrOptions

MrOptions

Let it go. This to shall pass.
Jan 6, 2020
178
Any method you choose to ctb, will result in someone having to clean up the mess.
 
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Thereisnothing

Thereisnothing

Enlightened
Jan 4, 2020
1,604
My method has always been and always will be jumping off of a bridge. I have no issue ruing my life but I wont ruin my family's by dying in my childhood home. SN is cheap and easy to get, I understand. And maybe its just me, but the thought of any of my family members finding me blue makes me sick. How do you get past that? I would rather cause myself immeasurable pain that do that to my grandma.
I have never considered using SN and couldn't do as have very severe gastric problems anyway, so would be a no go method for me. When I researched it awhile back and seen about making body blue, then that made me shudder too. I am suicidal, but will always think about the consequences, prior, during and after and that will always include state of my body and the poor souls who have to find me and deal with the process. So will wish to make it kindest not only to myself but others afterwards. I say kind to myself too, cos I dont deserve a painful or horrid way out, I have suffered enough here, so am wishing to exit peacefully as poss, just dont know a way yet.

Your method of jumping, will take a lot of guts and strength, SI will be very strong. Its not a method I would choose for many reasons. But regards SN it seems popular awhile as its fairly cheap and easy to obtain, but I wouldn't personally trust it as a way to go for myself and am very scared and wary when others choose the method.
 
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voyager

voyager

Don't you dare go hollow...
Nov 25, 2019
965
If it's just a matter of people you know finding you, you can go any place where there aren't many people hanging around (that's what I'm personally planning). One can also go to some desolate place with no people at all if it is an option. Maybe wildlife will make you disappear forever, or maybe someone will find you but then it will be some stranger and your corpse probably won't look like a person anymore, so I guess it's bit less traumatic.

Yeah, I like the idea. Would love to disappear forever, or at least for a few thousand years. Problem is though, apart from a rope, there are so few means one can take freely across a border or the like, especially on planes. So, depending on where one is located it might be hard to find such a secluded spot and a method one is comfortable with.
 
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AlreadyGone

AlreadyGone

Taking it day by day
Jan 11, 2020
917
But wouldn't your family be more distraught if they couldn't find your body? They will never have closure.
 
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G

Ghost2211

Archangel
Jan 20, 2020
6,017
Hmm..thats true..I think I forget about that part. I think I just imagine I sink to the bottom but yeah thats not likely.

well... not to be unpleasant, but here if goes anyway. When you die in water you do sink at first, but then gasses build up in your body from decommissioning and your body will bloat and swell, and will then float. Also, whatever creatures live in the water may begin to eat the body. I'll leave it to you if you want to google what corpses found in water look like, but fair warning it's not for the faint of heart.
 
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H

Heady_Cerebrum

Member
Jan 24, 2020
98
No matter what you do to kill yourself, someone you know will be asked to identify the body afaik. Identifying a mangled corpse of a loved one would be quite traumatic, I would think.
 
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voyager

voyager

Don't you dare go hollow...
Nov 25, 2019
965
But wouldn't your family be more distraught if they couldn't find your body? They will never have closure.

That is true. It's also one of the reasons I began again confiding in my mother that I would eventually kill myself. The other one was that she wouldn't blame herself by hopefully understanding, which hasn't worked so well tbh. But before I kept hinting I would go travelling and not return, which is in fact true. She believed that though and thought I'd desert her leaving her to her own devices, because I guess in her mind it's just a bad patch and when we don't talk about suicide daily I'm effectively cured cruising the world having a wonderful time. This issue is really something we don't see eye to eye on.

So, definitely agree, unless one wants to torture one's loved ones one needs to come clean somehow. It's bad either way.
 
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S

S1mpleme

Mage
Dec 27, 2019
517
Easy. I have no family and nobody gives a shit if I'm blue or green.
 
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Broken Chimera

Broken Chimera

The abyss also gazes into you
May 27, 2019
972
You're going to be a mess when you die, regardless of what method you choose. But at the end of the day it's your choice.
 
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Defenestrator

Defenestrator

Experienced
Jan 17, 2020
257
even if u jump or use any other method u will be found one day or the other
This. Regardless of how you do it, someone will find your corpse no matter what.
 
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issyishere

issyishere

Goodnight and always remember that’s life
Nov 5, 2019
441
SN's major pro is that if you fail. you can easily come back with no major brain damage. If it does happen it's so rare we have no case reports of it. add in the fact its cheap, legal in most places, and SOMEWHAT peaceful (some have anxiety issues with jumping or kicking the chair but find drinking a solution easier) then you have the forums favorite method. You're afraid of your family finding you blue and that to me suggests you're a caring person. Even when you're planning to end your life you want the best for your family. I think that's a beautiful characteristic. Hope this helps :heart:
 
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cloudgazer25

cloudgazer25

a dead girl pretending to be alive
Jan 30, 2020
22
I have never considered using SN and couldn't do as have very severe gastric problems anyway, so would be a no go method for me. When I researched it awhile back and seen about making body blue, then that made me shudder too. I am suicidal, but will always think about the consequences, prior, during and after and that will always include state of my body and the poor souls who have to find me and deal with the process. So will wish to make it kindest not only to myself but others afterwards. I say kind to myself too, cos I dont deserve a painful or horrid way out, I have suffered enough here, so am wishing to exit peacefully as poss, just dont know a way yet.

Your method of jumping, will take a lot of guts and strength, SI will be very strong. Its not a method I would choose for many reasons. But regards SN it seems popular awhile as its fairly cheap and easy to obtain, but I wouldn't personally trust it as a way to go for myself and am very scared and wary when others choose the method.

I'm not worried about my SI. I may not want to CTB today or next week but I don't plan on being here past 30. I got 5 more years to either get my life together or CTB.
 
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cloudgazer25

cloudgazer25

a dead girl pretending to be alive
Jan 30, 2020
22
I realized my problem is that I always only imagined the jumping part and not what comes after. Of course when I imagined other ways of CTB I knew bodies would have to be found like duh but I was so focused on jumping that I forgot to factor in after, when my body surfaces.

Thanks all for the input and discussions!
 
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