I gave it another chance, and it was so dumb and naive

[Stroopwafel.]

I decide to get my shit togheter once again. I left the hospital and moved to another institution. For a bit I even got hope, the people in here are so damn nice and helpful and kind and sweet. Maybe this was my chance at life? Maybe things would work out in the end?

Of course, I was so wrong and I quickly got confronted with the cruel reality again. The department that needs to do my treatment/therapy has been fucking me over for more than a year now. And yesterday they decided it was time to do that again. Even after the damn ministry of health (even the damn minister himself) literally forced this institution twice now to help me, they are just continuing to deny me again.

I'm tired of fighting and I do not wanna get back up my feet anymore. I give up. I give up on life. It's been enough.

Honestly the people in here are amazing, but it's not enough to keep me alive. I am done with this world and the terrible human race. We are fucking awful and disgusting. We don't deserve life or this planet.

I took my SN with me from the hospital to this institution, with a tiny bit of hope that I might never use it. But I will use it. Some day I will. I'm not sure when, but it is going to happen, that's 100% sure. I don't think it will take much longer. I feel more than ever ready to leave this horrible existence.

 

[PDAnnie2610]

I know it's hard. I feel you..

 

[Celerity]

Idk how much what I saw applies in your part of the world, but I worked in the US for a hospital administration, and it was fucking awful. Soulless bastards. There's a reason the suicide rate keeps climbing around the world, and it's because modern cultures are psychopathic. No one cares about caring anymore. It's all just rules and regulations and procedures that generate the most money or save the most dollars at the expense of everything else.

 

[nobodyspecial]

I decide to get my shit togheter once again. I left the hospital and moved to another institution. For a bit I even got hope, the people in here are so damn nice and helpful and kind and sweet. Maybe this was my chance at life? Maybe things would work out in the end?

Of course, I was so wrong and I quickly got confronted with the cruel reality again. The department that needs to do my treatment/therapy has been fucking me over for more than a year now. And yesterday they decided it was time to do that again. Even after the damn ministry of health (even the damn minister himself) literally forced this institution twice now to help me, they are just continuing to deny me again.

I'm tired of fighting and I do not wanna get back up my feet anymore. I give up. I give up on life. It's been enough.

Honestly the people in here are amazing, but it's not enough to keep me alive. I am done with this world and the terrible human race. We are fucking awful and disgusting. We don't deserve life or this planet.

I took my SN with me from the hospital to this institution, with a tiny bit of hope that I might never use it. But I will use it. Some day I will. I'm not sure when, but it is going to happen, that's 100% sure. I don't think it will take much longer. I feel more than ever ready to leave this horrible existence.

I'm sorry for all the pain, anger, sadness and every other negative emotion you're feeling that brought you to this point. I hope you're able to find peace soon, however that comes for you.

 

[noname223]

I feel you with every try to recover I get screwed even more. Life is so cynic. LIfe gave me such a shitty hand.and now it is up to me to play with it. Sorry but I've lost. I've lost many years ago still I am trying. I often feel naive and hopeless.

 

[FuneralCry]

Living really is painful. I'm sorry to hear you are suffering so much, it is hard to be trapped in a hopeless situation, I understand. I wish you well.

 

[Stroopwafel.]

Idk how much what I saw applies in your part of the world, but I worked in the US for a hospital administration, and it was fucking awful. Soulless bastards. There's a reason the suicide rate keeps climbing around the world, and it's because modern cultures are psychopathic. No one cares about caring anymore. It's all just rules and regulations and procedures that generate the most money or save the most dollars at the expense of everything else.

Yes it's exactly that. It's only about rules and procedures and, of course, making money. It's all a big joke. They don't give a fuck about a human life. I don't fit in the money making business, because my problems are too complicated and complex. So they just don't help me.

I feel you with every try to recover I get screwed even more. Life is so cynic. LIfe gave me such a shitty hand.and now it is up to me to play with it. Sorry but I've lost. I've lost many years ago still I am trying. I often feel naive and hopeless.

Yeah it's so weird how we are still trying after years and years of failure. It's so naive, but somehow it just keeps happening. I keep saying I quit this shit, to eventually try AGAIN. Like how many more times need I get to fucked over before I realize it's not worth trying anymore? I mean I know damn well it's not worth it anymore. And I hope I won't change my mind on it anymore this time. I'm done. I'm sorry to hear you are in an afwul position like this as well

 

[Journeytoletgo]

I am so sorry life has led you to this path. I don't know how long you been on this forum however I'm sorry life has been so awful to you. I'm sorry you been let down by society for help. I wish you peace no matter your decision

 

[IWantToSleep]

I hope you find some peace.

 

[Alwaysbadtime]

It seems sort of shocking that you were able to bring with you sn to institution. I relate to what you are saying.

 

[Stroopwafel.]

It seems sort of shocking that you were able to bring with you sn to institution. I relate to what you are saying.

I can tell you it was really easy lmao. I let it deliver at the first place I was, then took it with me to this place. During moving I put it into one of my bags and that bag has literally been through a dozen hands.

 

[Snake of Eden]

Idk how much what I saw applies in your part of the world, but I worked in the US for a hospital administration, and it was fucking awful. Soulless bastards. There's a reason the suicide rate keeps climbing around the world, and it's because modern cultures are psychopathic. No one cares about caring anymore. It's all just rules and regulations and procedures that generate the most money or save the most dollars at the expense of everything else.

So true. I think it will implode one day and burn the perpetrators of thins dead beat only money seeking hegemonists