Darkover

Darkover

Angelic
Jul 29, 2021
4,732
I feel like every day I wake up it's the same bullshit over and over again. I'm never fucking happy anymore. All the things that used to make me happy just make me fucking miserable. I hate everyone around me. I want to die in my sleep so fucking badly but God never answers my prayers. This life wasn't meant for me and I can't wait till I never have to see another day on this ugly fucking planet.

I wish I could just do like assisted suicide
 
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ChildrensITV

ChildrensITV

Arcanist
Mar 14, 2023
455
Exact same. I spent practically the last month in bed, except one or two outings to buy alcohol. I figured: Applying for jobs doesn't get me a job so I can get the same effect by not applying for jobs.

I don't think I even sat in a chair for the last few days. I was either asleep or lying down, binging YouTube. I have been depressed most of my life but at least I had some sort of drive in the past. I thought there was a CHANCE - not at being happy but at being comfortable. Everytime I had a moment where I thought: "I don't feel as bad as I used to", BOOM! Something would bring me crashing right back down. But now things are worse cuz my drive is is lower and I'm older. I've seen the results of me hoping and trying: failure. The definition of insanity killed my drive.
 
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F

F@#$

Freedom seeker
Nov 8, 2023
879
I'm in the same boat. My life is a waste of energy.
 
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H

hopeless08

Arcanist
Dec 8, 2023
492
I feel like every day I wake up it's the same bullshit over and over again. I'm never fucking happy anymore. All the things that used to make me happy just make me fucking miserable. I hate everyone around me. I want to die in my sleep so fucking badly but God never answers my prayers. This life wasn't meant for me and I can't wait till I never have to see another day on this ugly fucking planet.

I wish I could just do like assisted suicide
I feel you. I'm so fucking angry at life, everything around me and everyone.
Today I feel like I'm going to explode with rage… I just want to be gone so badly.
I don't enjoy absolutely anything. I haven't left the house in months.Not one single thing brings me the least amount of pleasure. I'm done waiting for god to answer my prayers, I don't believe in god anymore and if god exists, I'm sorry but I feel he/she or whatever is cruel to watch us suffer this way, endure this much pain and not even giving us the option to leave this fucked up life in a peaceful way.
 
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FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
38,894
I also hate it as well, I'm always wishing for the peace of an dreamless, eternal sleep, all that appeals to me is being permanently relieved from this cruel and futile existence. I'd always prefer to not exist especially as for me to exist means to suffer so unnecessarily all while risking experiencing much worse suffering at any moment, legalised assisted suicide certainly needs to be avaliable especially as existence is just so harmful and dreadful.
The fact that suicide is purposely made so inaccessible will always be beyond hellish to me, but anyway I hope that you eventually find freedom from your suffering.
 
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Linda

Linda

Member
Jul 30, 2020
1,685
You could try doing something completely different, as an experiment. It's not guaranteed to improve things, but it might. Getting out of rut can sometimes help.
 
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FadingDawn

FadingDawn

Experienced
Jul 18, 2023
262
I also hate it as well, I'm always wishing for the peace of an dreamless, eternal sleep, all that appeals to me is being permanently relieved from this cruel and futile existence. I'd always prefer to not exist especially as for me to exist means to suffer so unnecessarily all while risking experiencing much worse suffering at any moment, legalised assisted suicide certainly needs to be avaliable especially as existence is just so harmful and dreadful.
The fact that suicide is purposely made so inaccessible will always be beyond hellish to me, but anyway I hope that you eventually find freedom from your suffering.
I honestly cant stand waking up, and the dreariness and dullness of dragging out and enduring life, of the futile and impotant rage about this hopelessness and feelings of entrapment bursting voicelessly inside of me each and eveyr fucking day. THis life is a sick cruel joke
 
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Darkover

Darkover

Angelic
Jul 29, 2021
4,732
You could try doing something completely different, as an experiment. It's not guaranteed to improve things, but it might. Getting out of rut can sometimes help.
i did i recently went on holiday to Skegness for a week it was horrible this was my only holiday in 18 years since my last one, the one 18 years ago was horrible also
 
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Unattainable666

Unattainable666

Enlightened
Mar 31, 2023
1,346
I just want to die
 
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H

Hunter2005

Experienced
Apr 15, 2023
224
I feel you man, every morning I wake up sad and dreadful. This world fucking sucks
 
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T

TiredOfAllThis

Arcanist
Feb 5, 2024
453
Every morning for the last 3 years starts with the same anxiety and regret for me. Every time I go to bed I wish to never wake up
 
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wanttodie

wanttodie

Enlightened
Apr 19, 2018
1,805
I also hate it as well I just want to die
 
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ChildrensITV

ChildrensITV

Arcanist
Mar 14, 2023
455
Weirdly enough, this thread made me feel comforted that I'm not alone. I know that "misery loves company" is bad, but sometimes it is comforting to know you're not the only one who feels this way.
 
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