I find the idea of people watching a suicide etc seriously disturbing.

[Meditation guide]

Generally, if a suicide is recorded it is by the person who committed suicide, as the hanging videos I've seen were either set up to be recorded by the person doing it or by a friend.
My reason for watching them is because I am interested in my own deliverance.

I should not have to do any of this. I wish I could simply have a physician do this for me instead of having to go through all of this. I would prefer not to ever see it, not to ever have to research it, not to ever have to think of the logistics of it.

 

[M]

I wouldn't be able to do that, to be honest with you.

 

[Fk_life]

I've come to a point where watching gore doesn't scare me like it used to. I still think they're fucked up though.

 

[motel rooms]

Not interested in gore. It's kinda weird that this thread is in Recovery.

 

[WatermelonMel]

Looking at the comments of a suicide video or stream on some sites is probably the most disturbing thing ever, people actually get off to it and enjoy it and show little sympathy. Definitely the darkest side of the internet.

 

[TriggerHappy]

We manically record and watch our births...
Why not our deaths..? Whats the issue?
Not into gore, into revealing the true stuff that lies beneath
They call suicides cowards, but I think they're really brave...
I know I'm touched but I find it really revealing when people post
their suicide clips....

 

[Meretlein]

I have never watched a suicide but I have been in a call with someone as they ctbed. He posted a goodbye thread in the forum asking for someone to be there with him. I asked him if he had gotten anyone to talk with him and he said "no". I offered to be there with him because no one should be made to die alone while wishing someone was there with him.

I also told him that he could change his mind at anytime but he didn't change his mind. I hope that me being with him was able to give him some semblance of peace at the end.

I wouldn't be able to do that, to be honest with you.

Do you feel that way about death in general or just suicide? Most people feel this way about suicide but do not feel the same about other manners of death.

This is not about you directly, this has just prompted me to share some thoughts I have had on this sentiment.

Many people think that being with someone as they ctb (whether in person or online) is deeply aberrant and wrong. This is mainly due to the sacred value we assign to life and ensuing taboo put on suicide. I witnessed the end of my grandfathers struggle with terminal illness and him dying, while it was an emotion event, it was not traumatic. It didn't feel wrong. I didn't feel like I did something sick. I feel the same about calling with someone as they ctbed.

Death's face is always ugly but the horror in which suicide is looked up is unique.

 

[Mr2005]

What a sad sad thread

 

[callme]

We manically record and watch our births...
Why not our deaths..? Whats the issue?
Not into gore, into revealing the true stuff that lies beneath
They call suicides cowards, but I think they're really brave...
I know I'm touched but I find it really revealing when people post
their suicide clips....

You are a rare kind for sure. The comment above yours has it as it is in reality. Without an emotional attachment be it negative or positive, gore websites would have probably not existed, idk..

 

[EliphasBlackwood]

I guess it doesn't bother me because I'm completely desensitised to it. For me it's just to see how they did it and what they did right. Stuff that can help me when it's my turn. I don't get off to the stuff but I don't feel empathy or anything really.

 

[Onkyo74893]

It isn't for me as well but I can understand why some people might be into watching that sort of thing.

1. They're curious about death and the process.
2. They might use it as what not to do with their method of ctb.
3. They want to become desensitized by death itself.
4. They want to feel something even if it's shock and fear.<---I can kinda relate to this since horror movies are the only kind of movies I watch.

I'm 62. When I was younger, I watched horror movies, ISIS executions, ets. But now, knowing I don't care to be in this world anymore, I don't care to watch anything grisly, I've seen just about everything anyway. Actually, being in a severe depression, I don't much care to watch anything, good or bad. I hope I'm not long for this world.

 

[Depressed Cat]

CTB videos can turn out to be educational to those who are suicidal. If one has doubts about one's chosen method, watching a person CTB using that method will give an idea of what one goes through, how it ends, how (or how not) to do it etc.

Yes, such videos are disturbing in general, but for the suicidal they can be instructional as well.

 

[june]

Those kind of videos are hard to find

 

[whatevs]

I have to be honest. I find these videos entertaining to an extent. They ARE sad, don't get me wrong, so I don't go out of my way to consume such media, but there is something exciting about recorded deaths. The same applies to crazed muslims or narcos mejicanos chopping heads off.

I definitely think there is something off with people that can "enjoy" gore, or at the very least they are more connected with something that's entirely human but should have been repressed by civilization.

 

[Siterfau]

It's definitely educational to an extent, but I cannot deny that even with that reasoning, there's something eerie about knowing that I'm watching a person's last moments. I wonder if most of them would have continued to record themselves if they knew that they'd be helping someone else potentially ctb too. I suppose it doesn't really matter in the end.

 

[Sherri]

Absolutely , there us one documentary called tge bridge you see them jumping but they stop filing after that. One eye opener about depression documentary.

 

[june]

I am sorry that there aren't good options to help. Many people who survive attempts say that they had regrets. IDK what to think really

 

[Disappointered]

I am sorry that there aren't good options to help. Many people who survive attempts say that they had regrets. IDK what to think really

Regrets about surviving you mean?

 

[ultrafuntimes]

I agree, those videos are very depressing. I used to watch them a lot to trigger myself on purpose.
I don't watch them very often anymore, though. Reading all the comments ridiculing the people in the videos make me too angry.