I feel might be (para)suicidal rather than suicidal

[LiminalFantasies]

I stumbled upon the word "parasuicidal" not too long ago. To my understanding from looking through various sources, parasuicide is the act to deliberately self-harm oneself without being fatal. Therefore, is choosing methods that have low rates of succeeding rather than actual suicide, which is the act of intentionally killing oneself though more fatal methods such as many of the methods often seen here (SN and N being most common ones I've seen so far), often resulting in ctb. Appears to be that being parasuicidal is really synonymous with intentional self-harming and have be either suicidal intentions or not, with the previous be seen more as attempting suicide without actually going to ctb on purpose.

I often pondered that based on my past actions, that might be I'm actually be more parasuicidal than feeling suicidal. On purpose, one of my attempts was overdosing myself with around 50 pills of melatonin and 7 pills of 20g exitalopram when I used to visit my previous psychiatrist who "treated" my school/university anxiety issues, with both chemicals being hard to overdose. The thought of choosing a more dealier and painful methods leaves me unsettled and terrified as I have a fear of dying but also got a fear of living and going through an existential crisis simultaneously, which is really odd and bizarre state to be in, least for me. I have frequent suicidal and self-harm idealization which I find it, strangely enough, serene and peaceful. Must be really brave and having lots of courage to actually make a sucessful ctb.

I wonder if they're anyone who might feel the way I'm feeling similarly.

 

[motel rooms]

There are people on here who don't realize they're parasuicidal

 

[Nohopeinhell]

Hi everyone on here, I just wanted to say God is real. I truly do believe this although I have been with a lot of great trials. I believe there is only one to God, it's through Jesus. I have had spiritual experience that have confirmed to be that there is a spiritual realm since I had past involvement in the new age (which I regret and brought a lot of oppression and suffering). I know everyone one here is going through their own pain that I can't even begin to understand and so sorry! It hurts when we ask God 'why' and all we hear is silence. But I truly do believe that there is a God and have seen it for myself and seen other testimonies of His existence. He does love His creation and I hope that you might ask/invite Him into your life instead of ctb if that is what you are thinking about. I'm trying to do that myself because I get so low sometimes but I'm still seeking trust in God over the alternative. I hope this message will encourage you that you aren't alone even when it feels like it. And you are loved which is something I have to remind myself too.

Why are you spamming everyones posts? Doesn't even relate to this post.

 

[Life_and_Death]

Why are you spamming everyones posts? Doesn't even relate to this post.

it interests me that ~95% of their posts is that copied and pasted, and the rest aside from 2 are at least mentioning "look for god" while the other 2 is saying thank you to another member and "looking for a friend".

its looking kinda suspicious on their part

 

[Nohopeinhell]

it interests me that ~95% of their posts is that copied and pasted, and the rest aside from 2 are at least mentioning "look for god" while the other 2 is saying thank you to another member and "looking for a friend".

its looking kinda suspicious on their part

Yep. I reported the account. Its not a new one either. Must have been waiting to post all the spammy shit everywhere.

 

[Dear Agony]

it interests me that ~95% of their posts is that copied and pasted, and the rest aside from 2 are at least mentioning "look for god" while the other 2 is saying thank you to another member and "looking for a friend".

its looking kinda suspicious on their part

I agree, that is extremely sus they're commenting this in EVERY post... that's just rude and disrespectful to me.

 

[Life_and_Death]

Yep. I reported the account. Its not a new one either. Must have been waiting to post all the spammy shit everywhere.

i reported the one on my post, didnt even know it was this kind of a problem until i saw your comment

 

[motel rooms]

Hi everyone on here, I just wanted to say God is real. I truly do believe this although I have been with a lot of great trials. I believe there is only one to God, it's through Jesus. I have had spiritual experience that have confirmed to be that there is a spiritual realm since I had past involvement in the new age (which I regret and brought a lot of oppression and suffering).

 

[LiminalFantasies]

There are people on here who don't realize they're parasuicidal

I also feel that might be the case for many that might feel that way without realizing. Being parasuicidal feels as if might be overlooked often or frequently mistaken as self-harm or suicide due to the really close similarities. By experience, if I experience parasuicidal attempts, might be treated as an actual suicide attempt by mental health professionals. Although, appears to be a grey area when compared to the definition of self-harm, parasuicide, suicide and especially, an unsuccessful suicide attempt being the closest synonym. I think comes down to being non-fatal regardless if death was intended or not and their actual intention is what sets parasuicide, self-harm and suicide apart.

Hi everyone on here, I just wanted to say God is real.

That first sentence alone and the rest of the paragraph you're spamming everywhere left me thinking that you're on a mission to literally forcefully convert EVERY one of us in this forum into your ideology, good luck completing that lol xd

it interests me that ~95% of their posts is that copied and pasted, and the rest aside from 2 are at least mentioning "look for god" while the other 2 is saying thank you to another member and "looking for a friend".

its looking kinda suspicious on their part

Appears we're might getting out topic at this point but I just looked at the profile of the person, was copy/pasting the same speech across many threads here and is just not me, others as well and is simply flooding and diverting from the topic and is what makes it annoying. I reported it regardless.

 

[Deardaddy]

am i hot ? lol

 

[Life_and_Death]

That first sentence alone and the rest of the paragraph you're spamming everywhere left me thinking that you're on a mission to literally forcefully convert EVERY one of us in this forum into your ideology, good luck completing that lol xd

As someone that believes everyone is god (to simplify) and not changing my mind, i dont like their chances. I already tried that religion and i saw so many holes in it you couldnt get me to believe it if i was drugged.

I reported it regardless.

Yeah, the mods are probably getting flooded with reports about them. Lol

 

[motel rooms]

am i hot ? lol

Who are you, @rhow90 's sidekick, the Virgin Mary?