Discussion I fantasize about someone doing it for me

[nomoredolor]

I have tentative plans to ctb but there are some things holding me back.

I feel so much relief when I think about someone taking the decision out of my hands and taking pity on me and putting me out of my misery. Like a mercy unaliving.

I'm not actually pursuing this for ethical and legal reasons but damn it's an attractive idea. I've actually fantasized about this in different scenarios since I was 12, basically for the last 20 years.

I like reading archive of our own with the "assisted suicide" tag for ideation.

Anyone else feel similarly? Does the thought of another person unaliving you with your consent bring you comfort?

As always sending all my love to all of you

 

[ijustwishtodie]

Yeah, I want to get murdered so that they finally end my pain for good. However, I do get scared that they may just end up injuring me instead of murdering me or that they murder me in the most brutal way possible

 

[nomoredolor]

Yeah, I want to get murdered so that they finally end my pain for good. However, I do get scared that they may just end up injuring me instead of murdering me or that they murder me in the most brutal way possible

Hard relate. Being tortured first or only be permanently injured would be a huge risk. Not to mention the risk of being trafficked

 

[justpathetic]

Hard relate. Being tortured first or only be permanently injured would be a huge risk. Not to mention the risk of being trafficked

If someone I could trust were willing to do it quickly I'd be happy. I think that's why euthanasia and maid are so attractive.

 

[SixNeufUn]

are you thinking by a gun? I have been fantasizing about it but honestly I don't really think I can keep my calm if it is not done by gun. At best a knife fight

 

[KillingPain267]

Yes, I do that too. In fact I watch gore executions sometimes just to imagine myself being the victim. I'm even willing to be beheaded brutally, seeing as how they most often die after less than 2 minutes. Because when the execution is done by someone else it's out of my hands and SI is no longer an issue. I just have to endure for 2 minutes.

 

[SixNeufUn]

Yes, I do that too. In fact I watch gore executions sometimes just to imagine myself being the victim. I'm even willing to be beheaded brutally, seeing as how they most often die after less than 2 minutes. Because when the execution is done by someone else it's out of my hands and SI is no longer an issue. I just have to endure for 2 minutes.

Until you see them opening your chest to take a bite of your heart

 

[KillingPain267]

Until you see them opening your chest to take a bite of your heart

I've never seen a video where they did that while the victim was still conscious.

 

[nomoredolor]

are you thinking by a gun? I have been fantasizing about it but honestly I don't really think I can keep my calm if it is not done by gun. At best a knife fight

I usually think about a variety of ways. And just trusting that person to finish me. I don't mind suffering a little bit.

Until you see them opening your chest to take a bite of your heart

Cannibalism would be a huge bummer for me ngl