My method is partial hanging. In my 20s I was so confident about hanging but I had a lot of life events that could change things for the better so I decided to wait and see how things turned out. I was naive and lacked impulsivity. I'm no longer naive but I'm still not impulsive and don't have any strong drives and for those reasons I think I won't be able to do this, no matter how much I want to. I've thought of going on antidepressants just to get that boost to ctb, something to consider I guess. I'm extremely concerned that no matter how bad things get I won't be able to ctb. For me it even has the opposite effect of when things get worse I feel more helpless and am even less likely to believe I will be able to successfully complete a hanging.
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DoubleUp8
Gambler
- Dec 14, 2023
- 335
It's the T.S. Eliot poem, the naming of cats.
I know what you mean, I have my method since a few months ago but I've decided that I will CTB in July, because I've been thinking it through and I thought that having my method ready would bring me relief but the fear and pain is still there. I've started imagining myself doing it a few times everyday so I become desensitized to the idea and I'd be able to process it and be able to do it.
Cinnamorolls
Member
- Apr 28, 2024
- 38
Same here. Last summer, I told myself I'd only give myself one more year and if things were not better by then, I'd end it. Now that year's time is almost up and nothing is better... yet I still don't know if I can do it. There seems to always be some little sliver of hope that I cannot get rid of.
It's such a difficult spot to be in and I'm sorry you're going through the same.
I almost hanged myself out of impulse a year ago but was interrupted…by false hope. Now I regret I didn't do it. I am not impulsive now, have made a deliberate decision instead. I just lack the energy to do all my planned final arrangements. I have thought about taking antidepressants again too, but recalled that they no longer work when I stopped. I might be using partial hanging too, combined with BDO to knock me out to overcome SI.
I totally got what you mean, I would also procrastinate and procrastinate if I don't have a deadline waiting for me.
I totally got what you mean, I would also procrastinate and procrastinate if I don't have a deadline waiting for me.
DefinitelyReady
Desperate to go--
- Mar 14, 2024
- 556
I kept thinking it was that netflix doc, but seeing this just reminded me that it's called "Don't F*ck with Cats."
Good to know, that was irking me.
Sounds like hanging isn't for you anymore. I think a lot of us were set on a method for years amd then changed for whatever reason. You think taking antidepressants will make you worse and boost you towards ctb?
R_N
-Memento Mori-
- Dec 3, 2019
- 1,429
It may be the case for me too but who knows. At least I'm more at peace now even when I experience physical pain. I don't really have fears anymore and could deal with literally anything that happens and accept it because I already went through plenty and came to terms with what human body is.
Where this leads me I dunno but we all die one day, I am fine with letting go of things now.
Where this leads me I dunno but we all die one day, I am fine with letting go of things now.
I've heard stories of depressed people getting slightly better and that giving them the energy to ctb. I don't know if antidepressants could do that for me. When I was young hanging seemed like such a simple method. Now that I know more about all the methods they seem so complicated and easy to mess up. The only method that seems fool proof is jumping from a huge height but I'm terrified of heights.
DefinitelyReady
Desperate to go--
- Mar 14, 2024
- 556
Ah. Now I get the antidepressants part. That's actually why I'm taking mine.
Hanging was never on my radar if it helps.
survival instinct is hard to defeat. I did try a partial recently, i blacked out within seconds easily without pain and without realising, but SI made me stand up and i came back completely scared and horrified, Putting out the rope. Did try to jump from height a lot, since months. Didn't succeed either.
Now everyone is different, every situation is different, but yeah that's not easy to make the last step. I do think now that personalities in a more impulsive way have a better chance to succeed. Maybe more courage too. That's it some Can, some can't. No matter how much you want it, it's not easy to achieve. Idon't think they are miraculous advices. Some people find the impulse and for some others it's very difficult; you'll know only when you try.
Partial is not difficult to understand and try. If you did try to find thé sweet spot of the carotid, it's easy and painless to blackout. But your survival instinct is in the subconscious and even if you're out, it will make you react to save yourself. So i'm shared about thé method, i didn't thought si could Come so strongly even when you're out. Obviously im not the only one, many people reported they woke UP even without the rope already etc...
Now everyone is different, every situation is different, but yeah that's not easy to make the last step. I do think now that personalities in a more impulsive way have a better chance to succeed. Maybe more courage too. That's it some Can, some can't. No matter how much you want it, it's not easy to achieve. Idon't think they are miraculous advices. Some people find the impulse and for some others it's very difficult; you'll know only when you try.
Partial is not difficult to understand and try. If you did try to find thé sweet spot of the carotid, it's easy and painless to blackout. But your survival instinct is in the subconscious and even if you're out, it will make you react to save yourself. So i'm shared about thé method, i didn't thought si could Come so strongly even when you're out. Obviously im not the only one, many people reported they woke UP even without the rope already etc...
I was planning on doing a partial in the prone position with my body fully on the floor and just my head being lifted by the rope.
I've considered SN but I think I'll mess it up with all the steps like acquiring it, getting meto, testing, measuring, etc. What's your method?
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