Help I dont feel i have any alternatives anymore

[Aliceinborderline]

Like ive thought about things for a bit and honestly there are things in life i enjoy there is someone i love but the latest series of flash backs and panic attacks and the general feeling that things cant get better has gotten me into a bad place. In canada it feels like we have very bad mental health care support where i am punished for being safe and sometimes rewarded for hurting myself with minor help which i desperately need more of. I want help i want to get better i want to see a way forward but with out help i dont see it happening my ptsd grows my pessimism too. What genuine alternatives exist that isnt me jumping onto the train tracks begging for help or praying for the train to strike me, or oding on basic meds. Im afraid of doctors invaliding me and being mean they have been so awful so far, family is no better and i feel so alone and trapped like nothing goes right it somehow goes nearly as worse as it can be and now i feel im out of options like even if i wanted to run away from family shelters are a ptsd trigger(i cant sleep around others) and have a 2 day wait list minimal what hope do i have

 

[love_peep]

this life is really very difficult and not fair to everyone, but I believe in you that you will overcome all difficulties and everything will work out in your life

 

[Praestat_Mori]

I'm sorry what you have to go through. I can imagine that it's difficult to get immediate help. I suggest in the meantime you stay with us for the moment and that will make time pass quickly I wish you all the best!

 

[The anhedonic one]

I'm so sorry that the Doctors and your Family are unsupportive and are invalidating your feelings.
Most people are self-absorbed and completely lacking in empathy.
I know this really hurts because I have been through this myself.

The people who are supposed to be helping you actually end up making you feel worse.
I'm so sorry you are trapped in this situation, and like many of us here, there is no viable solution as regards relocating to somewhere else due to financial issues.
Life is so cruel and unfair for many of us.

 

[Leeroy14R]

I also feel the same. The only thing left that I can succeed at is suicide.

 

[Aliceinborderline]

I also feel the same. The only thing left that I can succeed at is suicide.

I used to think the same but i cant even do that right my stupid survival instinct is too strong, when ever i come close i see my entire life flash before my eyes from when i used to love life when things where good all the things i have gone through to this date and i see my hopes dreams and passions and the one person who i genuinely love and imagine their reactions and all i can do is swear and hit the wall

 

[jonward55]

FuneralCry hasn't droned in this thread yet. I feel the same.

 

[Elysion]

I do not want to encourage you to commit suicide, but I am telling the truth. The passage of time does not solve any problem, it forces you to deal with it, no problem is solved until you understand that you have to solve it and not someone else, keep in mind that some failures or problems can never be compensated, so take time do not waste If you want to try to stay alive, you must use all your strength and distance yourself from this forum, but if you choose suicide, you must be determined. Constantly changing the decision causes loss of time and opportunities.

 

[Leeroy14R]

I used to think the same but i cant even do that right my stupid survival instinct is too strong, when ever i come close i see my entire life flash before my eyes from when i used to love life when things where good all the things i have gone through to this date and i see my hopes dreams and passions and the one person who i genuinely love and imagine their reactions and all i can do is swear and hit the wall

I used to think the same but i cant even do that right my stupid survival instinct is too strong, when ever i come close i see my entire life flash before my eyes from when i used to love life when things where good all the things i have gone through to this date and i see my hopes dreams and passions and the one person who i genuinely love and imagine their reactions and all i can do is swear and hit the wall

Its more like you are at the train station, and everyone who suicidal and jumping into the train tracks screaming, all bloody, and getting dragged to hell. You are gripping a suitcase very tightly. The suitcase is everything you have ever known, and the bullshit that life tells you. In the cold and dark station of horrors, the suitcase is the only warmth you will ever know. The more you go through life the more you will realize that the suitcase is actually cold, and that everyone has a smile of their face, jumping into the tracks getting carried to heaven. But in order to jump into the tracks you much let go of your suitcase.

 

[FuneralCry]

Existing certainly is so dreadful and it's such a horrible world we exist in where people suffer all through no fault of their own, but it's just the reality of existing here, I hate how it's this difficult to die, it's like the survival instinct exists just to keep people trapped here. But anyway I wish you the best.

 

[Livingvsdying25]

I feel ya. The mental health system in Canada us shit tbh. Especially when it comes to suicidality. It's hard when one can imagine a future but the aspects impacting ones present are too much to deal with.

The survival instincts being an obstacle is also relatable.

I hope your able to find some peace within whichever you choose