Alexandra_
Don't Fear the Reaper
- Sep 30, 2023
- 801
I spent so many months thinking I'd definitely be able to take it. But it's the same as always. I'm such a coward that I can't even kill myself. I feel sick of myself. How can someone be such a coward? I'm so tormented by my illnesses, and my life is a real nightmare. For as long as I can remember, I've always been afraid of suffocation; that's the only reason I can't take SN. I recently read in a thread where someone who had just taken it wrote that he couldn't breathe. The SN Bible mentions shortness of breath, and so does Google, etc. I understand that everyone experiences different symptoms. It looks like I'll have to consider the shotgun method again. Enduring a natural death is not an option; I have to find some way out. It's so bad that words can't even describe it! Many people dream of dying for years, but SI doesn't let them do it—it's very sad
