NothingElseMatters

NothingElseMatters

Warlock
Mar 30, 2020
745
All I know she ruined my life lefting me all by myself. That hurts so badly. Sorry I had to vent this again, you guys may be tired of hearing this but I don't have anyone else I can share with.
 
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KiraLittleOwl

Lost in transition
Jan 25, 2019
1,083
How long ago did she left you?
 
Arrow

Arrow

Rewrite
May 1, 2020
769
damn that's brutal. can't relate because i've never been in a relationship tbh.
 
K

Kumachan

Specialist
Mar 5, 2020
396
I miss my ex wife like crazy and its been 1,5 years since we divorced... I feel this regret of being an asshole and treating her like crap and cheating will never go away... Every minute i think about what ive lost...
 
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SpareWheel

SpareWheel

I go on holidays by mistake
May 4, 2020
354
Time heals all wounds apparently, it's done Jack shit for me in 7 years though, still think about her daily, still dream about her at least once a week.

You might find it easier though if she ruined your life, your love may turn to hate and you'll be free. When you're the one that was in the wrong, it's not so easy to get over I don't think. Guilt and regret don't make good bedfellows.
 
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Kumachan

Specialist
Mar 5, 2020
396
Time heals all wounds apparently, it's done Jack shit for me in 7 years though, still think about her daily, still dream about her at least once a week.

You might find it easier though if she ruined your life, your love may turn to hate and you'll be free. When you're the one that was in the wrong, it's not so easy to get over I don't think. Guilt and regret don't make good bedfellows.
yes, I agree with you on that one, regret is the worst... I dont think i can survive 7 years like that though... I had this experience with my first wife as well, dreaming about her, wallowing in regret for a few months but at some point it just stopped and i suddenly realized that she was never the right person for me anyway... My last wife is a different story altogether... Not going anywhere anytime soon, so I guess I have to go instead
 
SpareWheel

SpareWheel

I go on holidays by mistake
May 4, 2020
354
yes, I agree with you on that one, regret is the worst... I dont think i can survive 7 years like that though... I had this experience with my first wife as well, dreaming about her, wallowing in regret for a few months but at some point it just stopped and i suddenly realized that she was never the right person for me anyway... My last wife is a different story altogether... Not going anywhere anytime soon, so I guess I have to go instead
You might just need a few more weeks/months just to see if you can let her go, you might wake up one morning and find it doesn't hurt as much as it did the day before. Trust me, I know how much it fucking eats you up inside to miss someone profoundly though. I often think it would have better to have never loved anyone, that saying of it's better to have loved and lost is a load of old bollocks imo. If you don't give your heart, it can't get broken. All the best to you anyway mate, I'd buy you a pint and take you to a titty bar if I could, always helps a little when you're pining.
 
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Lostandfound7

Lostandfound7

Just waiting....
Jan 21, 2020
995
All I know she ruined my life lefting me all by myself. That hurts so badly. Sorry I had to vent this again, you guys may be tired of hearing this but I don't have anyone else I can share with.
Don't apologize for venting/sharing. It's necessary.

Sending u virtual hugs n comfort ♡
I miss my ex wife like crazy and its been 1,5 years since we divorced... I feel this regret of being an asshole and treating her like crap and cheating will never go away... Every minute i think about what ive lost...
Hey love..Is there anyway u can rectify what u have done? Couple's counseling maybe?
 
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deltaofvenus

deltaofvenus

Member
May 2, 2020
45
I wish I could say that you deserve better and that you can find strength in being alone. But it's bullshit, because I don't know your life and your story.

I wonder a lot about why humans desire what they cannot have. See, I am the opposite of you. I am dependent on someone abusive, I would like to leave him, but I cannot care for myself. When I see a post like this, I think "I would trade spots with you." But I am aware that people experience the world differently. I don't know anyone's suffering but my own.

What I can say with confidence, is that the way you are feeling is valid. That's the only thing that matters here. My only hope is that you will find the strength to survive this. Take care, friend. <3
 
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Kumachan

Specialist
Mar 5, 2020
396
Hey love..Is there anyway u can rectify what u have done? Couple's counseling maybe?

Ive done too much im afraid, cheated too many times, was rude to her... She has forgiven me a 100 times tho, and every time i would push her away again...

She blocked me everywhere now, maybe there is a 1/1000000 chance still but... I cant even forgive myself. I literally cant believe how i could be such an ass!

Thanks for your support~
 
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terry_a_davis

terry_a_davis

Warlock
Dec 28, 2019
707
I still regularly dream about 1 ex in particular 17 years(!) after we split, isn't on my mind when i'm awake but the dreams irritate me.
 
Lostandfound7

Lostandfound7

Just waiting....
Jan 21, 2020
995
What is that supposed to mean??
Ive done too much im afraid, cheated too many times, was rude to her... She has forgiven me a 100 times tho, and every time i would push her away again...

She blocked me everywhere now, maybe there is a 1/1000000 chance still but... I cant even forgive myself. I literally cant believe how i could be such an ass!

Thanks for your support~
Ok I understand..but u have to forgive yourself..♡
 
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chrijo

chrijo

done
Feb 8, 2019
329
True love is suicide..
 
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Icarus

Icarus

Member
Jul 25, 2019
76
I miss my ex wife like crazy and its been 1,5 years since we divorced... I feel this regret of being an asshole and treating her like crap and cheating will never go away... Every minute i think about what ive lost...
I feel your pain @Kumachan, even though I was not married to that girl
 
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NothingElseMatters

NothingElseMatters

Warlock
Mar 30, 2020
745
Ive done too much im afraid, cheated too many times, was rude to her... She has forgiven me a 100 times tho, and every time i would push her away again...

She blocked me everywhere now, maybe there is a 1/1000000 chance still but... I cant even forgive myself. I literally cant believe how i could be such an ass!

Thanks for your support~
Is that your main reason for suicide?
 
K

Kumachan

Specialist
Mar 5, 2020
396
I still regularly dream about 1 ex in particular 17 years(!) after we split, isn't on my mind when i'm awake but the dreams irritate me.

Wow... Have you had other relatiopnships in the meantime? Would it help to forget?

Is that your main reason for suicide?

yes, thats the main reason but not the only. My life fell apart, had a motorbike accident in 2019, job i loved is gone... Its like i had my best years you know
 
Cancún

Cancún

Experienced
Apr 20, 2020
216
you want to suicide because of a girl???????
 
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terry_a_davis

terry_a_davis

Warlock
Dec 28, 2019
707
Wow... Have you had other relatiopnships in the meantime? Would it help to forget?
Yes I've had a few serious relationships since (but not for a few years) but she was the one I should have settled down with. She was the 'one' and I think that's why she still haunts my dreams.
 
idabradybaby

idabradybaby

It's Not Suicide, Its Freedom Frm Life's Hell
May 5, 2020
5
Been Here N Still Am I Hope You Get Through Ts. Wether Not You Ctb You Have Good Vibes Upon You N I'm Here For Anybody To Vent, Talk, Bother, Spam, Irritate, Annoy, Befriend, Spazz Out On, Study Buddy, Y'all Can Even Call Me, If You Feel Like Telling Someone Something Dumb. I'm Here ❤️
 
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tothemoon

Member
Aug 5, 2019
76
Time heals all wounds apparently, it's done Jack shit for me in 7 years though, still think about her daily, still dream about her at least once a week.

You might find it easier though if she ruined your life, your love may turn to hate and you'll be free. When you're the one that was in the wrong, it's not so easy to get over I don't think. Guilt and regret don't make good bedfellows.
I don't want to get into a sexist battle, but girls rarely die because "I treated my bofriend/ex husband bad". They just don't really give a shit. We should try and do that too. But I know it's not easy. I did somethings in my marriage that might've cost it, and I deeply regret those BUT...there's also a lot of evidence my wife knew before any issues she wanted to divorce and only stayed married to me cuz she got a greencard out of it. So...that makes it easier. But in the end, dude, women don't give a shit, guys shouldn't either.
 
SpareWheel

SpareWheel

I go on holidays by mistake
May 4, 2020
354
I don't want to get into a sexist battle, but girls rarely die because "I treated my bofriend/ex husband bad". They just don't really give a shit. We should try and do that too. But I know it's not easy. I did somethings in my marriage that might've cost it, and I deeply regret those BUT...there's also a lot of evidence my wife knew before any issues she wanted to divorce and only stayed married to me cuz she got a greencard out of it. So...that makes it easier. But in the end, dude, women don't give a shit, guys shouldn't either.

The main difference I've observed in my time on earth between men and women is - when men say it's over for good, we don't often mean it and can be changed. When a woman finally says it's over for good, it is.

I think women can take more shit and forgive it than men, but once their mind is made up, they're gone for good.

Just personal experience, I've still got another 2 billion or so women left before I can present a thorough dissertation :) sounds like fun, but most of them would be over 60.
 
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tothemoon

Member
Aug 5, 2019
76
The main difference I've observed in my time on earth between men and women is - when men say it's over for good, we don't often mean it and can be changed. When a woman finally says it's over for good, it is.

I think women can take more shit and forgive it than men, but once their mind is made up, they're gone for good.

Just personal experience, I've still got another 2 billion or so women left before I can present a thorough dissertation :) sounds like fun, but most of them would be over 60.
Simply because they plan it months and years in advance. When guys say "wow, maybe this marriage should end" they usually tell their wives relatively soon after, when things are still fresh, the situation is maleable. Women, when they say "Wow, maybe this marriage should end", then say "I will now wait for a few years until I'm completely emotionally prepared for it and then end it". That's why they "make up their minds more".
 
NothingElseMatters

NothingElseMatters

Warlock
Mar 30, 2020
745
What piss me off is that I did everything I could for her, bought everything she wanted, give her love and attention and that's what I get in exchange. Hear her saying to me "I'm with someone else and no longer care about you" really hurts.
 
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SpareWheel

SpareWheel

I go on holidays by mistake
May 4, 2020
354
I'll take your word for that one mate, I've never gotten longer than 4 years with any of them, and apart from one, I was always the one doing the ending. Maybe I was preempting them coming out with it subconsciously, poor lasses had been planning it for ages and I ruined their big reveal. I envy anyone that's had a proper long lasting relationship, mine have always fizzled out, burnt brightly at the start and ended up stagnant. I'm hard to live with though, I'm like a puppy, I need a lot of attention and exercise or I start being mischievous. Sometimes even pee on the floor and poop in their shoes.
 
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tothemoon

Member
Aug 5, 2019
76
I'll take your word for that one mate, I've never gotten longer than 4 years with any of them, and apart from one, I was always the one doing the ending. Maybe I was preempting them coming out with it subconsciously, poor lasses had been planning it for ages and I ruined their big reveal. I envy anyone that's had a proper long lasting relationship, mine have always fizzled out, burnt brightly at the start and ended up stagnant. I'm hard to live with though, I'm like a puppy, I need a lot of attention and exercise or I start being mischievous. Sometimes even pee on the floor and poop in their shoes.
You British? Care for The EPL at all? I like Everton myself. You're right, I'm being bitter. My ex bailed once she got her greencard. Looking back, we did have issues that people divorce over, but what fucked me was she just kept feeding me the bull that 'we were ok" until she got it and then hit the road. Married 5 years and, truth be told, she probably knew the first year or so she wanted out, but just shot the breeze until her papers were final. Well, if you did end them, that's emotinally mature on your part. Women (to their credit) usually step up to the plate when they realize it's not going to work. Us poor guys are so afraid of being lonely we desperately drag it on.
 
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SpareWheel

SpareWheel

I go on holidays by mistake
May 4, 2020
354
Sure am mate, and I'm a huge EPL fan, you won't like this though - I support the other mob on the opposite end of Stanley Park to you :P finally about to see my team win the league for the first time as an adult, and bam, Covid. Only a game though, everyone will get over it.

Man, you got greencard stung, that sucks. Where was she from? I think my ex step-dad is going though the same now, he married a Russian last year, ever since she's been distant with him.

I'm OK with being alone, I'm an only child so I often prefer it. I ended two promising looking relationships in the past few years purely because I realised I was happier being single, as soon as I start having to constantly text someone or speak to them every night or see them every few days, I get cold feet. I know others are different though, they crave companionship and security more than anything.
 
C

codewarrior

Member
Apr 30, 2020
36
Bro, Indeed its very difficult to forget, the glimpses of past would always appear. You are not alone at all.
You would always find something or someone far better in life only if you believe in yourself and time.

If you are healthy, you cant just stop living though just because someone goes away. People would come and go, your actions or duty shoudn't stop and your first prime duty is caring for your body and earning enough to sustain life, achieving your goals .
Don't take me wrong, I understand its easy to say for me.

Edit: A hardworking man falls in love for a woman. Woman goes away one day for whatever reason. Our hero is sad and dejected. Over time his health is affected and goes severe that he is no longer physically fit and goes into depression. The woman, doesnt even care and its her choice for whatever reason.
But seriously, who is at loss? Man would suffer lifetime and parents would cry lifetime is he is gone. Is it worth it? No way. If time is gone, its gone. Focus on whats next.

Lesson: Have love, respect faith but dont be so attached so someone beyond your own self.

Note: I just referred central character as "Man" part of story, it can happen with woman too.
 
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