![spectraltease](/data/avatars/l/43/43054.jpg?1718195512)
spectraltease
When everything is lost everything is found
- Sep 23, 2022
- 276
I am very paranoid. I think there is always someone behind me who is watching me or wanting to harm me. This is getting worse and worse lately. I was never afraid to go out when it was dark, now I'm afraid of being attacked. I have a lot of fears. I don't have any friends and I don't dare to go out either, I hate summer. At most I only go out for shopping. I only open my windows at night because I'm afraid of being watched. At night I always watch my windows because I'm afraid that someone will come in.
Today I did it again and I watched a YouTube video, it was about not letting the negative manipulative voices win that only want negative things.
I stopped staring at my window and said to myself that I was safe. At that moment I heard a bang that I've never heard before. A movement at the window, something that came into my apartment. I yelled at the thing and ran towards it. It was a cat. Funny story I know but not funny for me. I'm very tired but I don't dare to go to sleep because I'm afraid it wasn't a cat.
In the last time it was always the case that I didn't want to sleep because I had so much fear. I often stay through the night so that I can sleep during the day. Does anyone else have that?
Today I did it again and I watched a YouTube video, it was about not letting the negative manipulative voices win that only want negative things.
I stopped staring at my window and said to myself that I was safe. At that moment I heard a bang that I've never heard before. A movement at the window, something that came into my apartment. I yelled at the thing and ran towards it. It was a cat. Funny story I know but not funny for me. I'm very tired but I don't dare to go to sleep because I'm afraid it wasn't a cat.
In the last time it was always the case that I didn't want to sleep because I had so much fear. I often stay through the night so that I can sleep during the day. Does anyone else have that?