I am going to fail university degree

[FireFox]

My assignments and exams are due in January but I have fallen behind on all my readings due to procrastination. I want to read but my mind doesn't let me it's so annoying.

I actually hate my life. I am 27 and having a near to mental breakdown because I have not found a guy while everyone else is getting married. I always thought at this age I would be living in my own apartment, in a career and in a stable relationship. None of this has happened for me which is why I want to kill myself when I turn 30 because I don't want to do another decade anymore.

I just feel trapped all the time and have to find my own coping mechanisms because therapy is NOT an option anymore. NHS is inaccessible i have tried in the past, better help is too f*cking expensive and my university counselling services are not reliable. The day I was supposed to have my first appointment this week the University counselling services ends up cancelling it. Now I wait several weeks for another appointment which may not come.

 

[bitcrushing]

i sympathize since im in the same boat right now with the last yr of my masters degree, i always find a way to put things off until the last minute and have to rush and halfass whatever i have left due, always left disappointed with the results

being around and knowing people who have all those things that seem to be a bare minimum for stability around our age is depressing af, demotivating too since it's something that's just expected to happen to everyone and yet it doesn't

i still think you should try though, considering you're making an effort to even go to counseling which is a big step, the worst part is always getting started with whatever needs to be done