So... first of hi, new as a member but have read this forum for about 6 months and now i need to get advice on my plan.
So my backstory is that i am a middle aged father of two that is overweight (will become important later perhaps). I make a good living but as most people i have mortgage, loan etc...
Due to circumstances that i won't go into i am facing two years in jail. I did not hurt anyone or do anything intentional but that's the situation.
This will basically cost me my entire life as I won't be able to pay any bills, I do not have enough savings to keep paying for house, insurances etc. I will end up in debt I probably will not be able to pay off during the rest of my life and end up at the bottom of society.
So to commit suicide seems to be the only way to get out of this and also help my children. That might sound stupid but my argument is that if I die now, yes they will be sad. It will be tuff but they will be financially stable at least and do not have to endure my shame. I have life insurances and other work insurances that I've checked will still be available even if I commit suicide. And yes many argue "money is not everything" but it is a lot.
So my plan is to hang myself in the garage, I've got good beams and was thinking maybe just using a short fall as the leaning method don't seem to work for me. I think its because I am about 290-300 lbs. I've tried a few times to get the feeling but I end up as many can attest to that I only feel like my eyes are bulging and head getting filled with blood. As I understand it I don't get the arteries. Ive also tried to choke myself out with my hands but it just don't work and I really do not have any option to miss when I do this so I need to be certain it will work.
So a short fall like.. 10-30cm from the ground, it will probably be quite horrible but I was thinking that I can stop the survival instinct from stopping me to tie my hands behind the back with stripes.
The rope ive gotten is a good none-elastic rope that's certified for 900lbs so even if I trash around a lot I don't think it will be break.
My plan for not making sure that my kids find me is this:
I will use apple home automation to send an SMS to a friend telling him what I have done on a week when I do not have my kids and they are at school (next week). I plan on hanging myself about 1-3 AM and having the SMS go out at 9 AM.
This will spare my kids from finding me.
Ive also prepared a USB stick with all our photos, all they need to use all my accounts that I feel they will inherit like steam, Ubisoft, EA etc.
Ive bought a special mobile phone and prepared it with all necessary multi-factor for all my digital accounts, access to basically my entire life and such.
Ive also prepared letters and il leave all that on the kitchen table.
Does my plan sound ok? Have I missed something big?
So my backstory is that i am a middle aged father of two that is overweight (will become important later perhaps). I make a good living but as most people i have mortgage, loan etc...
Due to circumstances that i won't go into i am facing two years in jail. I did not hurt anyone or do anything intentional but that's the situation.
This will basically cost me my entire life as I won't be able to pay any bills, I do not have enough savings to keep paying for house, insurances etc. I will end up in debt I probably will not be able to pay off during the rest of my life and end up at the bottom of society.
So to commit suicide seems to be the only way to get out of this and also help my children. That might sound stupid but my argument is that if I die now, yes they will be sad. It will be tuff but they will be financially stable at least and do not have to endure my shame. I have life insurances and other work insurances that I've checked will still be available even if I commit suicide. And yes many argue "money is not everything" but it is a lot.
So my plan is to hang myself in the garage, I've got good beams and was thinking maybe just using a short fall as the leaning method don't seem to work for me. I think its because I am about 290-300 lbs. I've tried a few times to get the feeling but I end up as many can attest to that I only feel like my eyes are bulging and head getting filled with blood. As I understand it I don't get the arteries. Ive also tried to choke myself out with my hands but it just don't work and I really do not have any option to miss when I do this so I need to be certain it will work.
So a short fall like.. 10-30cm from the ground, it will probably be quite horrible but I was thinking that I can stop the survival instinct from stopping me to tie my hands behind the back with stripes.
The rope ive gotten is a good none-elastic rope that's certified for 900lbs so even if I trash around a lot I don't think it will be break.
My plan for not making sure that my kids find me is this:
I will use apple home automation to send an SMS to a friend telling him what I have done on a week when I do not have my kids and they are at school (next week). I plan on hanging myself about 1-3 AM and having the SMS go out at 9 AM.
This will spare my kids from finding me.
Ive also prepared a USB stick with all our photos, all they need to use all my accounts that I feel they will inherit like steam, Ubisoft, EA etc.
Ive bought a special mobile phone and prepared it with all necessary multi-factor for all my digital accounts, access to basically my entire life and such.
Ive also prepared letters and il leave all that on the kitchen table.
Does my plan sound ok? Have I missed something big?
