Hurting

[whatever101]

I'm scared of hurting people even if it is just by defending myself for their actions. Because I'm scared of karma. Because I'm still hurting from the actions of the people I loved.

 

[Ineedtodie]

The best thought that worked for me in some instances is asking the question " is there actually a problem right now. If the answer is yes defending yourself in a reasonable way is ok. Just how I would operate sometimes. I know it can be complicated. I' m quoting eckart tolle. Though not sure I got it right. But sure helped me few times. Other times I lacked clarity. It can be challenging to deal with for sure. I don't know the context either, not sure either I would have been more helpful if I knew. Hope this was a bit helpful at least. Wish you clarity.

 

[timf]

Sometimes striking back can be a good strategy. However, there are some tactics that can be just as effective such as asking questions.

"Are you aware that what you said was really hurtful?"
"I am not sure I understand what your motive is here, could you let me know?"
"It seems like you want to hurt me, can you tell me why?"

Question asking can divert the other person and even put them on the defensive. It may be possible that awkward questions can produce a level of discomfort such that the person who is inflicting hurt will be motivated to go elsewhere.

 

[deathbylife]

Sometimes striking back can be a good strategy. However, there are some tactics that can be just as effective such as asking questions.

"Are you aware that what you said was really hurtful?"
"I am not sure I understand what your motive is here, could you let me know?"
"It seems like you want to hurt me, can you tell me why?"

Question asking can divert the other person and even put them on the defensive. It may be possible that awkward questions can produce a level of discomfort such that the person who is inflicting hurt will be motivated to go elsewhere.

So what are you trying to say?

 

[timf]

So what are you trying to say?

There are options besides just taking abuse or giving it.