D

DreamEnd

Enlightened
Aug 4, 2022
1,892
I can't help but think I will be punished for leaving this life too early. I'm only 26 and I feel like I'm ruining gods plan or something. I don't consider myself religious but with enough propaganda out into me by my surrounding peers makes me feel like death is not the end…
 
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LaVieEnRose

LaVieEnRose

Angelic
Jul 23, 2022
4,188
There is no prize at the bottom of the cereal box whether you see it through to the natural end or not. Humans evolved in the natural world and in that world the individual is completely disposable and means nothing. The idea of hell is at odds all with this truth.

But I know fears aren't so easily dispelled. I guess you could comfort yourself with the idea that God gave you the ability to choose. I mean, you could understand the concept of God to mean whatever feels right to you, might as well go with that.
 
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A

ae300

Member
Sep 16, 2023
49
How to stop fearing death?

Maybe when you think that death is the most natural thing in the world! Death makes room for n.ew things. Every atom in you has been present so many times in other live processes and will be again. The entire universe and life is nothing more than a huge waste recycling factory.
 
tired0zymandias

tired0zymandias

Live Fast, Die Young
Sep 25, 2023
46
I can't help but think I will be punished for leaving this life too early. I'm only 26 and I feel like I'm ruining gods plan or something. I don't consider myself religious but with enough propaganda out into me by my surrounding peers makes me feel like death is not the end…
My mom also knowing that I'm suicidal. She keeps talking about this. Like she tells me that I will be punish and there's no place for me in the eternal life.

Somehow I feel scared, but we never know right? I consider myself as religious. I'm a muslim, which its a big sin if I'm doing suicide. Tbh idk how to feel. But I'm getting anxious and more anxious.

I also afraid that my mom will go insane and ruin my whole family. It sounds selfish if I still want to ctb. But I can't bear with it anymore.

I got xanax for my panics or anxiety but I choose not to consume it, for SN prep.

Well, my friends as a human we can decide. So please be wise whatever your choice is. Make sure you're responsible to all the following things that gonna happened when you leave this world.

May you find a best way for you either ctb or staying alive. You're entirely up to you!
 
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Ampsvx123

Ampsvx123

Student
Jul 10, 2018
128
The righteous does not fear retribution. Let their be pain for his gluttony and sins. Let him be reminded of the darkness of his heart, of the malevolence that taints his soul, of the many times he went along with the world's ways, and nonchalantly added to its malices, who hid when called to stand up. Let their be retribution and pain in his death that matches the endless filth of a lifetime. No, the righteous does not fear divine justice. He knows that it is kind and fair, and a needed steps in his purification and greatness.
 
M

MadisonMoon

Member
Oct 1, 2023
16
I am spiritual, but not particularly religious. I have, however, thought long and hard on the subject of the meaning of life, what would make sense,
what doesn't...insofar anything about this crazy life and world of ours makes sense.

So no, I can't and won't be quoting scripture. I can however be more honest than most theologians by saying "I simply don't know. God/Allah/Jahweh/Vishnu/The Great Spaghetti Monster never showed his or her or it's face to me, or spoke to me.

A punitive deity also seems strange to me. Heck, even among theologians there are fierce debates whether even Judas was a sinner, as it was foretold he would betray

Jesus. If it was foretold, and therefore part of God's plan, how could he be blamed - some argue.

To focus less on Biblical stories, (criminal) psychologists commonly recognize (criminal) behavior stems from either chemical inbalances in the brain or, quite simply, people becoming products of their environment. How then can you reasonably assign agency and self-determination? Not to be an apologist for criminals, but it does leave you to wonder.

"Okay Madison, hard to argue so far..." I hear you think, well not really, but to cleverly keep steering this post in a certain direction "....but what then, is this believe system of yours?"

Quite simply, I feel the only thing that makes any kind of sense, what would make any kind of 'divine justice' and which more or less ties in with our scientific understanding of the universe is this. We are, indeed, made of star stuff, we are a part of the natural evolution of the universe, our body containing (among other things) heavier elements that could only have been forged through super-novae. Iron, magnesium and so on.

For all our shortcomings we are our own Gods, angels, demons and so forth. Insofar heaven and hell exist, it is up to us which one of those we create, here on Earth - on this little pale, blue dot of ours (to quote Carl Sagan).

It might be weird, but for someone who is suicidal, I am rooting for reïncarnation, and that too is the only thing that makes sense to me. That we learn through multiple lifetimes, that this is the driving force behind evolution. That a collective, learning force drives us forward (or backwards) and that we are responsible and the repositories of our collective knowledge. And yes, in that sense we'll reap what we sow - do we put our collective willpower and intelligence and ingenuity to create a just world for all, not knowing as who or where we'll come back, or do we create an unequal world? A living hell of over-consumerism? A burning, practically unliveable planet?

In my heart of hearts I do believe in this, or if not that, hope for this - though I do worry we're very much on a path of turing this planet, and our lives, into an actual hell of a super-heated planet, forest fires, acidic oceans, where demons (Trump, Putin, Xi Jiping and many more besides) rule.

Make of this rant what you will, but I don't think a just God, or a just universe would punish someone for taking their own life. Heck, in many cultures suicide is considered an honorable act. It is mainly a western and Middle-Eastern (monotheistic) belief system. And how then should we feel about Jewish prisoners in WWII concentration camps? Who saw no other recourse but to commit suicide and spare themselves absolutely inhumane anguish? How should we feel about Hitler? Who, for all our fantasies about time travel and killing Hitler, was the only guy who actually managed to kill Hitler. Or how about human rights advocates, resistance fighters in many wars and so on, who opted to commit suicide rather than face torture and the very real prospect of not being able to not betray their cause under duress and torture? Or, for that matter, how should we feel about any soldier, in any army, anywhere? Who knowingly charges into the enemy. Isn't that a form of possible, pre-meditated suicide?
 
darkenmydoorstep

darkenmydoorstep

Not Waving But Browned Off….
Sep 27, 2023
520
I can't help but think I will be punished for leaving this life too early. I'm only 26 and I feel like I'm ruining gods plan or something. I don't consider myself religious but with enough propaganda out into me by my surrounding peers makes me feel like death is not the end…
No one knows for sure do they? That's the truth of it. Life or death is a gamble in that respect.
 
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mind_split

mind_split

Newbie
Sep 29, 2023
41
I dont have any advise.. just wanted to let you know that Im feeling the same.
what if the "afterlife" is going to be even worse than life? :-/
 
haibane

haibane

Reki
Sep 27, 2023
258
I can't help but think I will be punished for leaving this life too early. I'm only 26 and I feel like I'm ruining gods plan or something. I don't consider myself religious but with enough propaganda out into me by my surrounding peers makes me feel like death is not the end…
If god's plan was to make me suffer that much. My Suicide was probably god's plan too
 
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FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
37,419
In my case I find so much comfort in the thought of permanently ceasing to exist, I believe death to be the perfect state of eternal nothingness, free from all suffering and harm. To me there's so much beauty in being free from the curse that is existence, all that existence was is the most horrific mistake that tragically disturbed the peace of nothingness.

I don't believe in any religion, it's all fictional to me and was invented by humans who were unable to accept how meaningless existence truly is where we are destined for nothing but to decay and die.
And anyway death is the most normal thing, it's inescapable, the only thing I fear is this repulsive and harmful existence, it's terrifying how there's no limit as to how much one can suffer which is why death comforts me as nobody can suffer from not existing.
 

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