How to get over the guilt in regard to the pain i’ll cause my parents?

[Volatile]

They're good people and have done so much for me. They adopted me when no one else would and have tried to help me get over my childhood trauma.

My death would break them but I'm in such agony. Childhood trauma is like cancer. It just spreads until the organism is enveloped.

 

[Samuel]

Remember it's your choice. Your parents will be ok.

 

[Samuel]

Have you told them you're wanting to ctb? I tell my mom sometimes that I'm going to take my life. It makes me feel better knowing she knows.

 

[Tomasnil]

I wouldnt know of that since i hate them and one of them is dead.
But i was never loved only used

 

[Sternum]

I'm not sure it's true that your parents will be ok. I have neighbors who are family friends who had a son that committed suicide at 16 yrs old. That was about 20 years ago and recently they said they still think about him every day. I'm not trying to dissuade you from suicide, because I absolutely believe it is your choice and nobody else's. But it is also reasonable to have a good idea of what you are doing. I plan to follow through with it even though I know how hard it will be for my family. The thing I go back to is this thought: I didn't choose to enter this world, it was imposed on me... a 'gift' I did not request. That other people had sex which produced me doesn't commit me to participation in a state of existence that is misery. It is not reasonable to expect you to continue in a state of agony so others can avoid feeling pain. If you continue to exist for the benefit of others, that is a perfectly valid choice. But if you end the agony that you experience, which you did not choose to accept in the first place, that is a perfectly valid choice, too. There is no good solution to this problem, which is why I support antinatalism.