Help How to deal with difficulty feeling anything real?

[ImpairedLowlife]

I'm genuinely trying to recover, feel better, be better, healthier, happier. And objectively my life and my mental health is improving, but this deep anhedonia doesn't go anywhere.

It's been like this for probably over 5 years in which I haven't truly feel happy or alive. Only emotions and feelings I can truly experience are negative ones: frustration, anger, despair, sadness.

Life feels like a movie I'm forced to watch rather than actual well.. life which I'm experiencing.

I'm trying to have good rest, do things I enjoy, minimize stress and it works for overall better mood and state of mind, but real feelings seem to be a thing in a distant past.

How can one recover from that numb state? Is it even possible?

 

[aushunaph]

i personally try to listen to music or watch movies that will make me feel horrible and try to cry. it only works sometimes, but it's better than nothing

 

[Abyss Dweller]

Life feels like a movie I'm forced to watch

I'm sorry I won't be much of a help but that line is genious and I'm stealing it

 

[ipmanwc0]

This is my life exactly I have dpdr which is on the extreme end of numbness

 

[ImpairedLowlife]

i personally try to listen to music or watch movies that will make me feel horrible and try to cry. it only works sometimes, but it's better than nothing

Yeah, I've been able to cry from time to time, but it's on really rare occasions. And since getting better it doesn't really happen anymore, sadly