sam is aways offline

sam is aways offline

not even for a second will I ever be saved
Dec 1, 2020
First, sorry for my bad english, i'm far from being a native speaker (and this is tragic, i admit). So, basically, i really need to CTB because of traumatic events that have occurred all my entire life. I don't want to give more details, but it's something that fucked me uso much that I can't barely function as a normal person. My whole existence is a hell, and others usual problems you can expect from a person like me. Despite everything, i'm still attached to many things in that plan. There are things here that I really love, I don't want to leave behind. But the point is that it’s not about wanting anymore, I need to leave. But how, if I'm still so coward and attached? I don't need any speech about how I am not ready and things like that. Is there a mental exercise I can do to make the fear go away? Or I just need to follow my impulses? Planning or just my will?
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Miss the full ability to think
Apr 24, 2020
I'm sorry for what you've had to go through and I hope you find peace soon. I recommend that you take things slowly, plan out everything and make sure that it's really what you want.
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Hanging on is hard
Dec 2, 2019
Some things that helped me:
- detailed planning and taking steps to acquire the things I'll need
- saying goodbye to my pets outloud
visualization (I decided on my location and looked at pictures of it, imagining myself there, etc. Surprised at how much this helped.)


Useless since day 1
Jan 3, 2020
There are things here that I really love, I don't want to leave behind.

This tells me you are not ready to CTB. However, if you do decide to go ahead with it make sure you do your research. consider the risks involved and decide on a method which suits you. Fear is a normal emotion when facing death. It might help if you write a letter to yourself explaining why you wanna CTB and make peace with it.

disclaimer: I advise exhausting all your options before CTB. You can always CTB later but you can't come back from it. Cheers


Mar 31, 2020
If you're not prepared mentally or physically to die, I strongly urge you to give yourself more time before taking action. Suicide is irreversible.