How often does hope flicker in you?

[leavingsoon99]

Today was a rainy, cloudy day. Then the sun came out. I don't know, there's something about the sun that lights a glimmer of hope in me. By hope, I mean that there might be something to live for. That if I just try one more time. Then, I'm brought back down by reality. What the sun lights up is pollution, homelessness, unrest, and (in my life) the lingering trauma and realization that the life I struggled so hard to create will never be. My health is deteriorating. I'm constantly tired. My finances are not adequate to even attempt old age. I'm alone in the world. Dating prospects are zero. I've failed at business so much that I'm not motivated to attempt another go. My care for life has died. I'm a hopeless misanthrope. As much as a part of me wants to hope, I can't unsee nor unfeel my reality. I won't give in to the delusion of hope.

Is there anyone else who struggles with this?

 

[justwantpeace520]

Too often that it keeps me going, the flicker of what if...I attribute a lot of that due to some of my sports teams always being mediocre but me, still, tuning in with the hope that they succeed.

 

[Brokensoulwalking]

Too often at the fact I am talented at one thing I love and maybe one day I can do it till I'm not longer in pain everyday.

But as quick as the hope comes so does the darkness

 

[hockeymum9999]

I do have minimal glimmers of hope which is why I think I haven't ctb yet or am not fully ready. I am making the arrangements now so I will have everything I need when I feel ready. I could say I will be ready when I lose all hope or when I have finally accepted that my life is just existing in this world I was never meant to be a part of.

 

[TheHuman]

Hope is the relentless whisper that lingers amidst despair, whispering "you should live and continue to suffer in this cruel world". I am one who has lost it all that whisper is not anywhere to be found within me.

 

[hellispink]

Never. I have seen felt the worst i cant see no lights even if sun is out.

 

[charlotte_]

I often get this whenever I have a day when I'm treated better than others. It gave me some hope that things will be better after all. But my hope never stays so long.

 

[montimoo]

Anytime I see my little sister happy about something :,)

 

[OceanBlue]

That if I just try one more time.

Yes, it's very human, our brains messing with us.

Hope is the relentless whisper that lingers amidst despair, whispering "you should live and continue to suffer in this cruel world".

Our species lived through the worst and still tend to be grateful at the end of life - the past seems increasingly more positive as we age. Perfect hell.

 

[CrazyDiamond04]

I'm reminded of a Nietzsche quote reading this: "Hope, in reality, is the worst of all evils for it prolongs the torment of man."

 

[whitherrvbound]

Nah its a dead-end and im deadset on doing it. Its not a spiritually pragmatist one either is it blank or reincarnation i dont believe anything. I just wanna forget the past.

 

[rawwar539]

I wouldn't call it hope. With me it's more that I have successfully distracted myself for a while. But make no mistake that this is on my mind every single day.

 

[InSearchOfLess]

I know my case isn't the case for most here but I have a good life I don't have depression or any illnesses, however I do believe that my life even though I have a good one isn't something I care to prolong into old age Id rather just get it over with, Ive lived long enough that Ive seen and done enough In my time Im satisfied, I don't lack nor do I need hope.

 

[Praestat_Mori]

Hope is a bitch. There's still too much hope left although I've given up already.

 

[yobba]

Same. I don't really call it hope. It fells more like drowning and barely getting up for air once in a while but it doesn't matter because nothing has changed.

 

[greyblue_bian]

Today was a rainy, cloudy day. Then the sun came out. I don't know, there's something about the sun that lights a glimmer of hope in me. By hope, I mean that there might be something to live for. That if I just try one more time. Then, I'm brought back down by reality. What the sun lights up is pollution, homelessness, unrest, and (in my life) the lingering trauma and realization that the life I struggled so hard to create will never be. My health is deteriorating. I'm constantly tired. My finances are not adequate to even attempt old age. I'm alone in the world. Dating prospects are zero. I've failed at business so much that I'm not motivated to attempt another go. My care for life has died. I'm a hopeless misanthrope. As much as a part of me wants to hope, I can't unsee nor unfeel my reality. I won't give in to the delusion of hope.

Is there anyone else who struggles with this?

Yes, this is the reason why I am still here. I tend to feed into mere possibilities of things getting better and worse. I'm trying to let myself fall out of hope now. But, it will be a struggle, as always.

 

[Forever Sleep]

Absolutely- the biggest crashes I've felt have come after feeling hope. I don't trust it at all! It's hard though- if you feel compelled to stay here- then, you may also feel like it makes sense to try and make your life better here for the time being- rather than worse- and it's hard to aim for things without hope.

 

[downndone2]

Less and less each passing day. My despair is agonizing

 

[FuneralCry]

Never. In my case I'm fully aware of how hopeless and dreadful existing truly is, and existing just doesn't appeal to me anyway, just the fact that there's unlimited potential for suffering in this hellish world automatically means that not existing is the preferable option no matter what. It's certainly true though that any hope in this world is just a delusion to inevitably lead to more torment once one has no choice but to face reality, as the reality is that there's no real relief from suffering in this world, the existence of life in the first place was the most horrific mistake.

 

[telro]

It doesn't. I don't even want a better life, I just want to be dead. There is nothing left to hope for.

 

[leavingsoon99]

It doesn't. I don't even want a better life, I just want to be dead. There is nothing left to hope for.

I feel this.

 

[enough of this]

Hardly ever anymore.

Today was a rainy, cloudy day. Then the sun came out. I don't know, there's something about the sun that lights a glimmer of hope in me. By hope, I mean that there might be something to live for. That if I just try one more time. Then, I'm brought back down by reality. What the sun lights up is pollution, homelessness, unrest, and (in my life) the lingering trauma and realization that the life I struggled so hard to create will never be. My health is deteriorating. I'm constantly tired. My finances are not adequate to even attempt old age. I'm alone in the world. Dating prospects are zero. I've failed at business so much that I'm not motivated to attempt another go. My care for life has died. I'm a hopeless misanthrope. As much as a part of me wants to hope, I can't unsee nor unfeel my reality. I won't give in to the delusion of hope.

Is there anyone else who struggles with this?

I struggle with it every day.