Discussion How much pain

[TransientEternal]

How much pain are you willing to go through? How long are you willing to wait? What is it stopping you? Fear of pain, failure, maybe hope, or is it all just another flavor of survival instinct? How much pain before you stop caring about the cost?

 

[BWV478]

Fear of death, more specifically of a bad afterlife is the only thing holding me back. Pain doesn't bother me. I've never attempted though so I have no idea how well I'd handle SI kicking in, to be fair.

 

[Yuna is My Waifu]

I'm in great emotional and physical pain every day, i just haven't killed myself yet because I'm a pathetic coward. I'll do it eventually, i refuse to hit 40, that's my ultimate time limit.

 

[LeperGnome]

I've given up hope, I know ctb is the only reasonable thing for me. I'm confident in my method(s), so I'm not really afraid of pain or failure. I'm simply waiting for an event to come to pass, then I'm out of here.

 

[NeedAnEscape]

I have become more numb to the world around me lately. I end each day feeling defeated, and I don't look forward to my mornings. I feel inadequate in professional and social environments. I have taken up enough mental pain that I have resumed self-harm. I don't know how much of the physical and emotional pain I can endure before I end it all. I fear being discovered before I can execute my plans. I fear the potential of waking up again. If I reach a point where my life has truly amounted to nothing, then I am prepared to give up forever. Either life has to give me a compelling reason to keep living, or else I will finally reach my breaking point.

 

[leavingthesoultrap]

Right now fear of failure. I want to be as prepped as possible.

 

[pthnrdnojvsc]

Right now fear of failure. I want to be as prepped as possible.

Me too

 

[FuneralCry]

What keeps me trapped here is the fact that suicide methods are just inaccessible or risky. It's so horrible how we exist in this pro-suffering world where suicide isn't accepted as a valid option where we cannot just easily die in peace when we wish to. I really hate how it's so unnecessarily difficult to cease existing on our own terms, what terrifies me is the thought of being tormented much more from trying to die going wrong.

 

[Ontwon]

I've been asking myself these questions daily now. I have the method set and ready, I can do it today. So why haven't I? Fear of holding the gun in my mouth I guess but fear of what exactly? Failure? I don't think I will fail. Afraid of success? My death is guaranteed with or without suicide. So I would say it's simple survival instinct that comes out as terror of the unknown, not wanting to hurt those I care about or leave a mess for people to clean up. Really it's cowardice at its core as I don't see any more hope and I know that if I don't make the most of the opportunity I have now then I will regret it later

 

[TheRottingContinues]

I mostly feel the fear of failure, but more specifically the fear that somebody else is going to find out. Whoever I live everybody is so anti-ctb it's crazy. If I get found out then I'll probably be restrained and sent to the psyche ward again, right to bear arms taken away, constant checks from a thousand different doctors and specialists who don't actually want to help, grades fucked, can't function, blah blah. I just have to get it right. I can't fail again this time. And if I fail, I'll run so I can't be found out and I'll eventually try again. I'm so scared that they will find me

 

[worstgirl7716]

I guess I'm afraid of pain. So yeah, that means failure too. I'm afraid of becoming a vegetable if I fail.

 

[chocosyrup]

How much pain are you willing to go through? How long are you willing to wait? What is it stopping you? Fear of pain, failure, maybe hope, or is it all just another flavor of survival instinct? How much pain before you stop caring about the cost?

There are two things stopping me, the few people I have left and my accessibility to preferable methods.

 

[GhostShell]

I only fear failure and the consequences of it - loss of freedom and access for the future. Unfortunately I am a very clumsy person which restricts a lot of methods. My fucked up metabolism restricts me even further. Pain is the last thing preventing a peaceful exit for me.

 

[starship]

I'm in great emotional and physical pain every day, i just haven't killed myself yet because I'm a pathetic coward. I'll do it eventually, i refuse to hit 40, that's my ultimate time limit.

I feel this and I appreciate you. I feel the same way

 

[Some place nice]

I fear hurting my bf. He doesn't need me to make him depressed again, but also at the same time I want to not be in pain anymore.