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Hotsackage
Enlightened
- Mar 11, 2019
- 1,156
Same here. Beyond fucked.
Terminal also?
when you go through different medications frequently for years and none of them help your homocidal/suicidal thoughts, you start to wonder if you're ever gonna be normal. after a while i've come to terms with my brain and how i think. i'm aware it'll never change and i'm fucked foreverI just feel like I'm already a lost cause, no matter who reaches out, I want death.
Honestly same- At 10 I took some stock in what was expected of me, both from society and from my parents and I realized... I wasn't going to do well in adulthood, somehow, lol. I lack my father's resilience and my mother's social cunning/natural evil to be able to do what's needed to survive. Not worth it. I don't have the energy for continued functional adult lifeI first wanted to die when i was 10 and the reason was i knew Id be an always failure for eternity. I wasnt wrong. Ive been to so many doctors and therapists but nothing has changed. Sure i had times that were great, but eventually something terrible happens and its back to 1. I just want to be free and death gives me that.