Discussion How many are here because they can't find intimacy?

[PersonBeforeLife]

Anyone have experience related to this? Where you use the dating apps, go to singles dating events and do everything you can but you are invisible... Just noise in a crowd of too many men (women I doubt have the problem of being invisible but I could be wrong but don't think I am)

Personally I've tried to literally just have 1 date and honestly... I'm cursed to have been born male and strait... I'm practically invisible... And the need for intimacy but never having it torments me... Enough to call it suffering to warrant self euthanasia. This is the closure I'm looking for if I've mentioned anything about closure recently. To know I will never attain a relationship. I'm below average and ultimately invisible in a market of way too many men.

I guess wanted to ask... At what point does it become clear that hopes for the loneliness to end become impossible?... Last thing I want is trying to endlessly win the dating lottery when it's so rigged there's just no point enduring it anyway. I mean I'd hate in 5 or 10 years from now of exhausting trying to still have never had a relationship especially as I'm starting at the literal bottom to strive and struggle to build up from there.

 

[sohey]

I would recommend u stop with dating apps
if you're not at least 8/10 this is 99% of the time pointless.

Try to connect with people and build intimacy on communitys of your interests, maybe u will end up with a lots of friendzones but it's better than lottery with dating apps

I kinda have the same problem too. I'm only able to talk with girls from internet but even then every girl who shows even a little interest on me just become absolutely nuts in 2-3 weeks, is always

"it's not your fault, it's mine" "you are amazing ik u'll find somebody" "I just realized I don't need a relationship to be happy" XD

 

[Jonah Byrde]

Ive had sex a few times but never love or relationship which is a shame. This isnt the main reason i want too ctb, its quite low on the list for me.

 

[seigfried]

Ive had sex a few times but never love or relationship which is a shame. This isnt the main reason i want too ctb, its quite low on the list for me.

on god. im a virgin but i dont give 2 shits about getting my dick licked. i just want to be loved.

 

[PersonBeforeLife]

I would recommend u stop with dating apps
if you're not at least 8/10 this is 99% of the time pointless.

Try to connect with people and build intimacy on communitys of your interests, maybe u will end up with a lots of friendzones but it's better than lottery with dating apps

I kinda have the same problem too. I'm only able to talk with girls from internet but even then every girl who shows even a little interest on me just become absolutely nuts in 2-3 weeks, is always

"it's not your fault, it's mine" "you are amazing ik u'll find somebody" "I just realized I don't need a relationship to be happy" XD

So basically the lottery of life which I've lost every single time?

on god. im a virgin but i dont give 2 shits about getting my dick licked. i just want to be loved.

Yeah I was told. If it's such a big deal go to a prostitute. Translation. Pay someone to tolerate you and pretend that you are valuable. Ouch

on god. im a virgin but i dont give 2 shits about getting my dick licked. i just want to be loved.

Yeah I was told. If it's such a big deal go to a prostitute. Translation. Pay someone to tolerate you and pretend that you are valuable. Ouch

I would recommend u stop with dating apps
if you're not at least 8/10 this is 99% of the time pointless.

Try to connect with people and build intimacy on communitys of your interests, maybe u will end up with a lots of friendzones but it's better than lottery with dating apps

I kinda have the same problem too. I'm only able to talk with girls from internet but even then every girl who shows even a little interest on me just become absolutely nuts in 2-3 weeks, is always

"it's not your fault, it's mine" "you are amazing ik u'll find somebody" "I just realized I don't need a relationship to be happy" XD

I don't even get lucky enough to have this. Only matches I get are scammers.

 

[seigfried]

i hate when people say that. like you want me to cuddle with a prostitute? you want me to tell a prostitute my biggest fears while we gaze at the stars? fuck outta here

 

[.idiot]

A cope I have for this is to remind myself just how fucking boring the average woman of my generation is.

Any time I catch myself having thoughts of wanting intimacy, I recall what I am most likely to get from having a girlfriend- someone who spends most of the day doomscrolling TikTok because they are dull and have no real interesting hobbies, gossiping about what Jane did to Samantha because of Brad or whatever the fuck, and being forced along as the baggage carrier on shopping trips. Having to deal with the headache of this is what I would be left with after the initial wow factor with having access to a vagina, the novelty of which I am sure would wear off fast. I also recommend utilising this thought exercise if you're also in the Zoomer age range.

Of course, this is immediately fucked over once I begin to think about the minority of women my generation who are actually interesting people with hobbies and souls that do exist, but I try to avoid remembering such women exist because then I get sad.

 

[Jonah Byrde]

on god. im a virgin but i dont give 2 shits about getting my dick licked. i just want to be loved.

sex was good for me but love is meant too be 10x better. idk tho

 

[PersonBeforeLife]

A cope I have for this is to remind myself just how fucking boring the average woman of my generation is.

Any time I catch myself having thoughts of wanting intimacy, I recall what I am most likely to get from having a girlfriend- someone who spends most of the day doomscrolling TikTok because they are dull and have no real interesting hobbies, gossiping about what Jane did to Samantha because of Brad or whatever the fuck, and being forced along as the baggage carrier on shopping trips. Having to deal with the headache of this is what I would be left with after the initial wow factor with having access to a vagina, the novelty of which I am sure would wear off fast. I also recommend utilising this thought exercise if you're also in the Zoomer age range.

Of course, this is immediately fucked over once I begin to think about the minority of women my generation who are actually interesting people with hobbies and souls that do exist, but I try to avoid remembering such women exist because then I get sad.

Heck I'd take that. I just want to be wanted and needed.

 

[.idiot]

Heck I'd take that. I just want to be wanted and needed.

Dangerously low standards paired with a desire for affection are a slippery slope, man. Don't become the type to engage in findom or some shit like that, bro.

 

[PersonBeforeLife]

Dangerously low standards paired with a desire for affection are a slippery slope, man. Don't become the type to engage in findom or some shit like that, bro.

Findom is basically just manipulative prostitution. Yeah... At that point might as well just CTB

 

[Tyra]

There's a lot of women who chose to be single… women can live without men but men can't seem to live without women…. I really wonder why this is the case.

 

[PersonBeforeLife]

There's a lot of women who chose to be single… women can live without men but men can't seem to live without women…. I really wonder why this is the case.

Yeah... Exactly... Biology cursed us

 

[Tyra]

A cope I have for this is to remind myself just how fucking boring the average woman of my generation is.

Any time I catch myself having thoughts of wanting intimacy, I recall what I am most likely to get from having a girlfriend- someone who spends most of the day doomscrolling TikTok because they are dull and have no real interesting hobbies, gossiping about what Jane did to Samantha because of Brad or whatever the fuck, and being forced along as the baggage carrier on shopping trips. Having to deal with the headache of this is what I would be left with after the initial wow factor with having access to a vagina, the novelty of which I am sure would wear off fast. I also recommend utilising this thought exercise if you're also in the Zoomer age range.

Of course, this is immediately fucked over once I begin to think about the minority of women my generation who are actually interesting people with hobbies and souls that do exist, but I try to avoid remembering such women exist because then I get sad.

I don't have hobbies and just scroll tiktok. I have 0 friends, not even online ones. I scroll tiktok so I don't go insane from loneliness. I hate shopping and materialism…

I guess it would make sense a guy would only want sex because I'm dull (as you say and you mentioned wanting access to a vagina).

I haven't tried to date anyone for 3 years. I just don't see a point when most of all the guys are like you.

But that's life I guess. I think majority of people think "what can I get out of this person" when they want to be friends or date them. And I think that's sad…

I also find it funny how you mentioned personality when everyone knows men are motivated by sexual attraction more than anything. It's just like those tests where if a hot girl says "hi" it's a good conversation starter versus a ugly girl saying "hi" is a bad conversation starter.

Yeah... Exactly... Biology cursed us

Do you think it has to do with the fact that men don't form close bonds with other men?

Like I see women have very close female friendships and I don't really see men having very close male friendships, they seem surface level.

By the way I'm talking about average people in this scenario, not talking about neurodivergent individuals like myself.

 

[PersonBeforeLife]

I don't have hobbies and just scroll tiktok. I have 0 friends, not even online ones. I scroll tiktok so I don't go insane from loneliness. I hate shopping and materialism…

I guess it would make sense a guy would only want sex because I'm dull (as you say and you mentioned wanting access to a vagina).

I haven't tried to date anyone for 3 years. I just don't see a point when most of all the guys are like you.

But that's life I guess. I think majority of people think "what can I get out of this person" when they want to be friends or date them. And I think that's sad…

I also find it funny how you mentioned personality when everyone knows men are motivated by sexual attraction more than anything. It's just like those tests where if a hot girl says "hi" it's a good conversation starter versus a ugly girl saying "hi" is a bad conversation starter.

Do you think it has to do with the fact that men don't form close bonds with other men?

Like I see women have very close female friendships and I don't really see men having very close male friendships, they seem surface level.

By the way I'm talking about average people in this scenario, not talking about neurodivergent individuals like myself.

I honestly don't know. Personally I have male friends. And it's still so lonely. It's just...if I was gay which I wish so badly I was...it would be different...

And the tick-tock scrolling itself is a hobby I guess... something to talk about...I mean I can watch anime for hours (actually I don't have many hobbies or interests left beyond just roleplaying with AI, the same endless script on endless repeat)

Also with a relationship I thought people introduce eachother to hobbies. Like if I was lucky enough to get involved with someone who literally enjoyed watching paint dry id research dew points and humidity levels to partake in her interests. Because even if I'm wrong I see that is what sharing life is.

Also like 99% of girls I see I don't regard as ugly... And even the 1% ones who look like heart attacks waiting to happen weighing 500 pounds id still be flattered if they spoke to me. Hi would definitely be a conversation starter.

 

[Tyra]

I honestly don't know. Personally I have male friends. And it's still so lonely. It's just...if I was gay which I wish so badly I was...it would be different...

And the tick-tock scrolling itself is a hobby I guess... something to talk about...I mean I can watch anime for hours (actually I don't have many hobbies or interests left beyond just roleplaying with AI, the same endless script on endless repeat)

Also with a relationship I thought people introduce eachother to hobbies. Like if I was lucky enough to get involved with someone who literally enjoyed watching paint dry id research dew points and humidity levels to partake in her interests. Because even if I'm wrong I see that is what sharing life is.

Also like 99% of girls I see I don't regard as ugly... And even the 1% ones who look like heart attacks waiting to happen weighing 500 pounds id still be flattered if they spoke to me. Hi would definitely be a conversation starter.

Why do you want to be be gay? Do you have romantic attraction to men but not sexual attraction to them? Is that why you can't be gay?

 

[PersonBeforeLife]

Why do you want to be be gay? Do you have romantic attraction to men but not sexual attraction to them? Is that why you can't be gay?

So that I wouldn't be competing with 10 other options to 1 partner. I have no romantic attraction to guys whatsoever. The reason I wish I was gay is so that the dating pool would be different enough for me to actually be wanted and needed.

 

[Tyra]

So that I wouldn't be competing with 10 other options to 1 partner. I have no romantic attraction to guys whatsoever. The reason I wish I was gay is so that the dating pool would be different enough for me to actually be wanted and needed.

But have you actually heard of gay mens experiences? Large majority are just used for sex. It's very rare for a relationship to actually form.

There's no competition for sex (just look at grinder) there is extreme competition for a gay relationship.

And even then gay men are statistically the highest cheaters. So if you do get a relationship, you will probably get cheated on.