black.dahlia
Member
- Jul 9, 2023
- 37
im planning on attempting soon. i know i keep saying that and not doing it but i promise i mean it lol. my method is a regular tourniquet. i have no access to firearms and there is nothing in my house sturdy enough to hold my weight without breaking. this is the next best thing.
after reading about the night night method, i used that guide to find my "sweet spot" on my neck, but instead of using a ratchet on myself, i found a pair of old leggings and a wooden spoon laying around. (the idea i was going for is to look as inconspicuous as possible while also being functional) after speaking to a member here about a year ago that also left us this way, i think this has a decent shot, albeit not fancy. as also stated in The Last Five Acts, an emergency style tourniquet with household items has proven to work at least a couple times. so im not being totally stupid here.
because i cant do this anywhere but my house, id have to find a way to keep people from not only interrupting me during the act, but also not finding the body afterwards. id much rather the police find me than an unsuspecting household member. i was planning on locking the door i do it in, possibly barricade myself in the room a little bit, (our door knobs barely work) and leave a timed text message/ physical note on the door saying to call the police and not to come in.
after thinking on it nonstop, the most i can muster up for notes are just shitty apologies for basically everything i did, going past just the suicide. ill trash my journal, but keep a couple pages, so people have an idea on my mindset. the suicide should be enough indicator of my mental state already.
my date is still undecided. i feel like a good push to avoid SI would be to do it when my adrenaline is high and im in a crisis. my head is so clear and set on this i know itd be easy for SI to kick in during the act without an active strong motivator, so thats the best i got.
poke holes in this. say whats good about it and whats stupid. i need constructive criticism in this. my method isnt the most reliable, and im not in an ideal environment/situation a person dreams to ctb in. dont be needlessly mean, lol. i just want to do this right. thank you all.
after reading about the night night method, i used that guide to find my "sweet spot" on my neck, but instead of using a ratchet on myself, i found a pair of old leggings and a wooden spoon laying around. (the idea i was going for is to look as inconspicuous as possible while also being functional) after speaking to a member here about a year ago that also left us this way, i think this has a decent shot, albeit not fancy. as also stated in The Last Five Acts, an emergency style tourniquet with household items has proven to work at least a couple times. so im not being totally stupid here.
because i cant do this anywhere but my house, id have to find a way to keep people from not only interrupting me during the act, but also not finding the body afterwards. id much rather the police find me than an unsuspecting household member. i was planning on locking the door i do it in, possibly barricade myself in the room a little bit, (our door knobs barely work) and leave a timed text message/ physical note on the door saying to call the police and not to come in.
after thinking on it nonstop, the most i can muster up for notes are just shitty apologies for basically everything i did, going past just the suicide. ill trash my journal, but keep a couple pages, so people have an idea on my mindset. the suicide should be enough indicator of my mental state already.
my date is still undecided. i feel like a good push to avoid SI would be to do it when my adrenaline is high and im in a crisis. my head is so clear and set on this i know itd be easy for SI to kick in during the act without an active strong motivator, so thats the best i got.
poke holes in this. say whats good about it and whats stupid. i need constructive criticism in this. my method isnt the most reliable, and im not in an ideal environment/situation a person dreams to ctb in. dont be needlessly mean, lol. i just want to do this right. thank you all.
