Discussion How is everybody today?

[astaeste2021]

How is your day?

 

[Largeletters]

Eh. The usual. Not CTBing though, so there's that.

 

[Pisceslilith]

Horrible but okay at the same time, my trigger is around again and I really hate it when they're around but other than that I'm trying my best to be okay.

 

[Largeletters]

Horrible but okay at the same time, my trigger is around again and I really hate it when they're around but other than that I'm trying my best to be okay.

I'm very sorry to hear that.

 

[A_miStake_of_NATURE]

Feeling kinda numb…… and lonely. Trying my best not to cry…

 

[lovelyheartz]

i'm doing pretty badly, but my method's pretty much ready to go

 

[Huntfish34]

Just another day at work, but it wasnt terrible which is a plus for me.. Fairly sedated and numb atm so I am good to Go for now.

 

[S like Siren]

Here it's almost 6 in the morning ... I didn't sleep tonight because my cycle-wake unfortunately got unbalanced this week and so I'm sleeping during the day! Better ... because it's getting very hot and I hate it ...

---

 

[Wisdom3_1-9]

I recently reconnected with someone who means a lot to me but whom I hadn't heard from in months. He talked to me three days in a row after I reached out. I lent him money because he needed, even though I don't have much money myself. It's been two days now and I haven't heard from him again. Starting to wonder if I was used again. That little voice in my head that tells me that no one actually loves me and is just using me is gaining more credence every day.

 

[Mendex]

In 1 hour and 30 minutes, I have my math midterm exam. I don't know what is going to happen.

 

[Marktheghost]

Desperately lonely!

 

[who doesn't matter]

The usual just a bit more fucked up. Starting off with a terrible day at the job but nothing too surprising. A feeling I shouldn't probably exist, so yeah, a pretty normal day.

 

[ClownMe]

awful

 

[ShellofmyFormerSelf]

I'd kick their butt so damn hard if I could. Hate people who use others, it makes me wonder what drives them to be that way.

I recently reconnected with someone who means a lot to me but whom I hadn't heard from in months. He talked to me three days in a row after I reached out. I lent him money because he needed, even though I don't have much money myself. It's been two days now and I haven't heard from him again. Starting to wonder if I was used again. That little voice in my head that tells me that no one actually loves me and is just using me is gaining more credence every day.

 

[stilltrying]

Feeling kinda numb…… and lonely. Trying my best not to cry…

Same here. Everything seems so worthless these days.

 

[FuneralCry]

It's just another day of the same really. Existing is tiring and ctb is on my mind. As usual I am looking forward to falling asleep.

 

[Meditation guide]

Tired. Trying to imagine myself drinking SN and I can't.

 

[Largeletters]

Disgusting, miserable, food has been my comfort. I want to cry typing that, I hate how disgusting I feel.

 

[astaeste2021]

Disgusting, miserable, food has been my comfort. I want to cry typing that, I hate how disgusting I feel.

I'm sorry you feel that way

 

[theSuiCiDalCupCaKe]

I'm a bundle of nerves. Ready to ctb this weekend but have an assessment with the crisis team (NHS) tomorrow. Hoping I don't say too much to end up on a psych ward or something.

 

[motel rooms]

I'm giddy with joy

 

[Hurt]

These days have been indistinguishable for me. Can't change the way I feel.

 

[Snake of Eden]

Not so great. I am out of things to do

 

[Cast_Away]

You know, actually not too bad. I revisited the place where i was contemplating suicide about two month ago, and i looked at it differently today. Now i feel like things can actually change. I'll be realistic here, it doesn't mean they WILL change. There are ups and downs. Really deep downs. I still sometimes wake up feeling empty and worthless, and go out in the night, crying and hoping somebody is gonna stab me in the dark and it'll be over. But the other day i can just go with a flow of a random idea, like just jumping in the water in the middle of nowhere with my clothes on, because i want to. I don't care if it is stupid or abnormal. This is my life, i might decide to end it next day, so i'm gonna do what i fucking want. Recommend you to try. If you've ever wanted to try something stupid, but was afraid of people laughing at you, or have a weird dreams nobody understands, just try to make them true. It might change the way you look at your life. You have nothing to lose anyway, right?

 

[Huntfish34]

I agree and relate to a lot of that Cast_Away.... Just Go for it, do what you (we) want. What have we got to lose right?..

And with the stab you in the dark thing... Im totally with you on this, just this past Saturday I Almost tried to help (Good citizen, Good deed for the day?) someone in Serious need as she was getting halfway dragged by a car almost getting ran over. But I opted not to because I would have pulled my shotgun out to Try and help (maybe getting shot and killed myself?) but there was traffic Everywhere around so I got nervous and kept driving on hoping / praying somebody did stop or called 911.

Just 1 day at a time for me.......... Trying to pick my head up and lose a lot of my resentments and Self hatred which seem to drag me down More and more as the days go on.

 

[Largeletters]

If I had a method that would prove fatal, I would do it.

 

[motel rooms]

 

[k75]

I had to renew some paperwork with my therapist. One of the sheets was a suicide assessment, and one of the questions was something about if I was likely to act on any impulses while under their care. I said no, and my therapist told me my answer let her off the hook but she absolutely didn't believe me. Comforting.

 

[heraclitus23]

Feeling kinda numb…… and lonely. Trying my best not to cry…

Comfortably numb

 

[FinalDestination]

Numb and empty or just mad and wanting to scream profanities non stop- no inbetween.