Help How do you encourge youself to actual ctb ?

[Mywill]

I mean, drink youself to the point of doing it ? Cause I am having panic attacks everytime I am going to.

 

[Lunaloveflood]

I'm still contemplating it I'm too afraid to fail or panic and not try again for a long time. I want to be well prepared so no one can know before it's too late.

 

[Let'sgetoutofHERE]

If you're afraid to the point of having panic attacks about it, that means you're not ready yet. Don't rush it, you can still CTB later when you're absolutely sure

 

[HorribleFeelings1]

I mean, drink youself to the point of doing it ? Cause I am having panic attacks everytime I am going to.

I understand if it's SI (survival instincts) but if you hesitate without SI, then it can be possibly that you're not ready. Always remember that suicide is the ultimate choice that not only is it going to affect you physically and emotionally forever, but others around you. Make sure you're ready, and if you are, I can understand the fear of doing it. It can be SI like I said, but it's also your will of wanting to do it. The deeper of pain you are and the more suicidal you are, the easier it becomes. There are people out there who don't even care about pain or anything, they just want to leave. It's all in your will to commit suicide. You also have to think to yourself on how to become stronger to do it. If you believe that your right to commit suicide is valid and justified then you can use that as an advantage for yourself.

 

[Fragile]

if you really want to do this then you have to make peace with it beforehand, an impulsive attempt is almost a guaranteed involuntary hospitalization because you panic and call an ambulance, not to mention the damage to your body.

but making peace with this is something that takes time, this is the most important decision of your life after all. so don't rush it.
read some Stoic philosophy, find a way of thinking that you are comfortable with, alcohol and other drugs may help to give you confidence, but they don't give you peace of mind.

the benefit of doing this, is that you may find a reason to live, just don't attempt impulsively.

if you want to go then don't let fear and anxiety be the last thing that you feel, take time and only go when you feel comfort and peace, that way you will have dignity in your final moments.

 

[MoreThanAFeeling]

If you are in a shitty situation think of ways to make your situation even worse.

 

[one4all]

drink youself to the point of doing it ?

Could be a bad idea. Depending on how you plan to CTB. May i ask what your method of choice is?

 

[Thereisnothing]

If you are in a shitty situation think of ways to make your situation even worse.

Who on earth would want to make things even worse...............

 

[Lost in a Dream]

I'm not sure if it helps, but when my life gets bad enough that I feel like it's time, what I will do is listen to some music that gets me in the mood, either because it relaxes me or because the lyrics remind me of all of the reasons that I have for going through with it. I won't be drunk when I do it, but I will probably take 2-3 hits from a joint beforehand, just to calm myself further.

 

[GoodPersonEffed]

Who on earth would want to make things even worse...............

@Paul88 would, for one. :)

It's a sensible logic if not to everyone's personal taste. If one feels shitty enough to want to kill themself but can't quite do it, try feeling shittier.

 

[one4all]

It's a sensible logic if not to everyone's personal taste. If one feels shitty enough to want to kill themself but can't quite do it, try feeling shittier.

Hard to really argue the logic behind that. Not saying i'm agreeing though

 

[gnomeboy17]

I think if you're struggling that much, it's not quite your time. When you're ready you will be able to. Whether that's tomorrow, next week, month, year or never. Don't worry too much, your time will come.

 

[Cutepoison]

First, is that being alive is so much worse. When it comes to actually doing something, I'm currently trying to get as much info as possible on the method I want to use to ensure it doesn't fail

 

[Melkus2020]

Pain of living when i am really suffering is a major incentive to CTB for me. I see death as a permanent peace, and I'm willing to accept it.

 

[Querry1]

If the pain is too much for you, you won't care about SI (you will, but not that much). I could scream from having mental pain, and when the time came, I was ready to do it.

 

[k75]

If you have to ask this question, it means you might not be ready. It's completely ok to feel like this, and it's ok give yourself more time.

Suicide is the most important and permanent decision you'll ever make, and I believe it shouldn't be forced or rushed.

 

[Mywill]

Could be a bad idea. Depending on how you plan to CTB. May i ask what your method of choice is?

I planned on jumping, since it's accessible where I lived. I wanted quick end. I froze everytime when I was about to jump.

 

[one4all]

I planned on jumping, since it's accessible where I lived. I wanted quick end. I froze everytime when I was about to jump.

You are sure that the height you are jumping from will have the desired effect? Have you checked any of the resources or threads about jumping?

 

[LastRide]

I think if you're struggling that much, it's not quite your time. When you're ready you will be able to. Whether that's tomorrow, next week, month, year or never. Don't worry too much, your time will come.

brilliant ! so well spoken ! for all of us the time will come....and you will know when the time is right !

 

[socrates]

The point of CTBing is to find peace, not make your life even worse. It sounds like your not ready for it. You may be ready later or never, but take your time, there is no time frame on this. It is completely at your discretion.
I haven't CTBed yet because I'm not sure if I want to yet, so take you time.

 

[Emily_Numb]

If the thought of CTB is causing you anxiety then my opinion is, it's not your time. Most people I've seen on here who have CTB and made threads about it are remarkably at peace with their choice. If your frame of mind is like this, I think you need some support rather than making an impulsive choice you are pressuring yourself to make.

 

[YukiFox]

Since I joined the community I accepted CTB as a possibility, and not a definite decision. I don't judge myself, nor others, if we want to do it. So if in certain point my life becomes unbearable, I think CTB carefully and do it when I feel ready to make it. Surely isn't the best option, but since I don't fear anymore what will happen in the afterlife I don't care, it's my private decision, period.
I will encourage myself when I decide that I couldn't get better or finish my goals (I fear a lot the unemployment and the aging) and say to me "You aren't a sinner, you're a brave person" and proceed to CTB in any method that I'll choose.
Seriously, we must to bury the christian tradition viewing and start to take the CTB as a personal matter and as a private decision. The world will continue. The CTB Will not stop the economy, so I'm pro-choice since I think that some people need to CTB peacefully without the stupid judgment of society over their heads. If someone found their purpose in CTB Fine, we must to stop put the mental instable label to him/her and understand their backstory, since I want to be understood in my decision. Sure, the ideal scenario is the CTB finished in a private place or they doesn't affect others directly or indirectly (Since jump into the traffic, jumping at the train, arson, murder and then CTB, etc.) But not all the pro choices thinks like me.
Anyway, I don't talk directly of my encourage (hahaha) but I imagine that when I decided I'll hug myself and will think in a good afterlife place to stay before I proceed to CTB. Since I'm a pagan I believe that I will reincarnate, even I CTB successfully.

 

[LastRide]

Since I joined the community I accepted CTB as a possibility, and not a definite decision. I don't judge myself, nor others, if we want to do it. So if in certain point my life becomes unbearable, I think CTB carefully and do it when I feel ready to make it. Surely isn't the best option, but since I don't fear anymore what will happen in the afterlife I don't care, it's my private decision, period.
I will encourage myself when I decide that I couldn't get better or finish my goals (I fear a lot the unemployment and the aging) and say to me "You aren't a sinner, you're a brave person" and proceed to CTB in any method that I'll choose.
Seriously, we must to bury the christian tradition viewing and start to take the CTB as a personal matter and as a private decision. The world will continue. The CTB Will not stop the economy, so I'm pro-choice since I think that some people need to CTB peacefully without the stupid judgment of society over their heads. If someone found their purpose in CTB Fine, we must to stop put the mental instable label to him/her and understand their backstory, since I want to be understood in my decision. Sure, the ideal scenario is the CTB finished in a private place or they doesn't affect others directly or indirectly (Since jump into the traffic, jumping at the train, arson, murder and then CTB, etc.) But not all the pro choices thinks like me.
Anyway, I don't talk directly of my encourage (hahaha) but I imagine that when I decided I'll hug myself and will think in a good afterlife place to stay before I proceed to CTB. Since I'm a pagan I believe that I will reincarnate, even I CTB successfully.

Beautiiful post, well explained....hugs for that thank you !

 

[TAW122]

For me, there are several things. One of the things I do is I keep a personal log of events, incidents, transgressions, and any other ill negative thing that acts as my suifuel. For some people they are doing it for therapeutic purposes and recovery, but for me, I'm doing it because I know that I will CTB and I don't want to get better (I've pretty much given up at this point; only maintaining a front just to keep people IRL from intervening or invading my privacy or business). Having such suicide fuel will propel me to go forward and CTB and not look back. Another thing that pushes me towards it is my reasons and my realization and acceptance of how fucked up the world, my problems, permanent ailments (anxiety never going away and getting worse, my Aspergers lifelong disorder, social anxiety still shit, etc.), and more; then asking myself is life still worth living (for me)? The answer I arrive at a lot of times is a resounding, NO. Therefore, I've logically and emotionally arrived at the conclusion that CTB will be my fate (if I don't die from other causes before then). The times that I'm alive, I find myself only coping and also only enjoying temporary relief in a sea of lifelong misery.

I understand if it's SI (survival instincts) but if you hesitate without SI, then it can be possibly that you're not ready. Always remember that suicide is the ultimate choice that not only is it going to affect you physically and emotionally forever, but others around you. Make sure you're ready, and if you are, I can understand the fear of doing it. It can be SI like I said, but it's also your will of wanting to do it. The deeper of pain you are and the more suicidal you are, the easier it becomes. There are people out there who don't even care about pain or anything, they just want to leave. It's all in your will to commit suicide. You also have to think to yourself on how to become stronger to do it. If you believe that your right to commit suicide is valid and justified then you can use that as an advantage for yourself.

Good post and really good last sentence. This is what I am doing too, as some decisions and actions come easier for me when I feel 'justified' and rationalized. It serves as a driving force towards it.

if you really want to do this then you have to make peace with it beforehand, an impulsive attempt is almost a guaranteed involuntary hospitalization because you panic and call an ambulance, not to mention the damage to your body.

but making peace with this is something that takes time, this is the most important decision of your life after all. so don't rush it.
read some Stoic philosophy, find a way of thinking that you are comfortable with, alcohol and other drugs may help to give you confidence, but they don't give you peace of mind.

the benefit of doing this, is that you may find a reason to live, just don't attempt impulsively.

if you want to go then don't let fear and anxiety be the last thing that you feel, take time and only go when you feel comfort and peace, that way you will have dignity in your final moments.

Agreed and yes, this is part of my process before I go to CTB. I am in the process of making peace with many things and so far, I have surrendered my investment in many areas in life and the few remaining bastions of hope and life will fall in due time for me.