How do people find meaning in life? (+venting)

[5nicotine]

Has anyone understood why people want to live so much? Where and how do they find meaning in their life and how is that meaning so strong that it makes them want to push through all the hard things in life? I'm having trouble believing that my life's meaninglessness is just distorted thinking caused by depression. It's not like anything actually matters, but how is that not something everybody believes.

Technically my life is going fine at the moment (with medication and therapy helping a lot). The next three paragraphs are me just opening up and venting so feel free to skip them.

I have friends and the medication is easing my previous (apparently psychotic) beliefs that those friends actually dislike me and everything I do. We set up a system with my best friend for not talking about ctb so she doesn't feel burdened by it and can keep on being my friend (I really hope it will never end. I wouldn't be able to take it).

My body dysmorphia has eased up a bit and I'm feeling more confident that my weight and appearance are normal and that's fine.

I'm in an "intellectually demanding" job doing something I love (math) and it's keeping me entertained and stimulated. It is however also causing me constant stress from feeling lazy and stupid everyday. The goals are very uncertain and the path there is even more uncertain. I'm scared of my advisor even though he's really nice and understanding every time we meet. The only thing in the world I can imagine doing is causing me this constant pain.

So I start to wonder how do some people do it? They have less interesting jobs that are much more demanding than mine and they go through this pain and stress for what? What is the "meaning" that keeps them going and makes their life livable? I'm starting to think misanthropic thoughts that maybe they're just idiots (provably it seems more than half of the US population is). Sure the people who see through this are sad and unable to live, but is depressed thinking pathological? Is it just disordered thinking that can be fixed by therapy or brain chemistry fixable by meds?

I'm really not seeing how I can recover if I can't answer this question. Rationally I'm just not seeing how there's anything more to see in life and why I (or anybody else) would want to live for 50 more years. I'm in the constant feeling that it would be so nice and helpful if I died right now. I'm just waiting for death. I still have my plan and I'm even berating myself for not putting it into action and just getting it over with. Oh how lazy I am.

 

[brazilianairforce]

In my opinion there isn't just one answer that question. I think that everyone has their own reasons to live and they all come from different sources. Some get theirs from their religion, Most that I have talked to live for their families, a few like social interactions and enjoy being around people and some just don't think about it enough. It's not usually something they just decided one day, it's the culmination of multiple years of different experiences that gives us a meaning to live.

 

[KillingPain267]

They don't just find meaning. They are given it or else don't have it. I don't have meaning to my life, I've lost it, so I will have to end my life.

 

[UnnervedCompany]

Sometimes people do not have a meaning or reason but know that it is the best option for their existence so they just persevere. That is basically me rn.

 

[Hollowman]

They're really good at deluding themselves.

 

[ebg]

I don't think people consciously wake up every day and decide whether they want to live or not. I think only when one's quality of life is at a certain level is one able to find meaning in life. I also think there are external pressures from family/close ones to want you to be alive, the idea that there may be nothing after death scares some people, people thinking that suffering is only temporary or that there is always something worth living for that they just haven't discovered yet, not seeing death/suicide as an option (even though it always is), we have constant distractions in front of us that keep us entertained (youtube, facebook, twitter, etc.) for the time being. I think that people also find meaning in life if they feel like they are doing something "good", like being of service to others whatever that may mean to them.