How do I work up the courage?

[Stepheng7287]

I want out. Everyday is misery. I have everything ready to CTB but I just don't have the guts. How do I make myself go through with it?

 

[Soulless Angel]

you can't force yourself into a situation if its not a situation you are not prepared or ready for.

 

[Ramirez]

Took me to loose everything and be homeless to really commit and I'm very much of a coward. I agree that you shouldn't force it when you are not completely ready yet.

 

[BPD Barbie]

When you're ready you will know the time is right, until then, as others have said, don't force it and try to act impulsively. There is no magic button for this sadly.

 

[VIBRITANNIA]

you shouldn't make yourself go through with it if you're not ready. there's no shame in waiting until you're ready. it's natural to feel apprehensive, since ctb is such a big decision.

 

[WornOutLife]

I'm a coward when it comes to CTB so you can try to CTB in a better way than I did by basically same method.

I tried taking lots of pills and partial hanging but failed because the pills had an effect on me faster than expected.

I would never try something hardcore such as jumping off a building. I really admire those brave suicidal ppl.

 

[Stepheng7287]

I'm a coward when it comes to CTB so you can try to CTB in a better way than I did by basically same method.

I tried taking lots of pills and partial hanging but failed because the pills had an effect on me faster than expected.

I would never try something hardcore such as jumping off a building. I really admire those brave suicidal ppl.

I plan on going the Nitrogen route. Seems to be the least scary by far. Actually seems really peaceful to be honest. Still don't have the balls though.

 

[Meditation guide]

Still don't have the balls though.

It is possible you never will have the balls.

 

[MariV]

For me: to remember how much ive suffered and how much suffering lies ahead. but thats just me

 

[pleasethistime]

As a jumping survivor from years ago i may say prozac gave me courage back then. It made me jump with 0 hesitation. But it depends on brain chemistry at the moment and may be different for different people.

 

[cyndoesntwannalife]

You are not ready. That's a good thing.

 

[Stepheng7287]

You are not ready. That's a good thing.

Everyday is misery. I wouldn't say that's a good thing.

 

[Sinkinshyp]

this is the most important choice you will ever make. There are no do overs. Don't rush it, dont act on impulse. Wait until you are ready without any hesitation.

 

[StateOfMind]

I want out. Everyday is misery. I have everything ready to CTB but I just don't have the guts. How do I make myself go through with it?

Whats your method?

 

[Stepheng7287]

Whats your method?

Nitrogen

 

[Breadbfra]

As a jumping survivor from years ago i may say prozac gave me courage back then. It made me jump with 0 hesitation. But it depends on brain chemistry at the moment and may be different for different people.

Can I ask you how much did you take?

 

[tidalwxves]

I want out. Everyday is misery. I have everything ready to CTB but I just don't have the guts. How do I make myself go through with it?

This isn't something you force yourself to do, if you aren't up for it then it's not your time. That is something I will stand by, if you are too fearful to do it you shouldn't be doing it.

 

[StateOfMind]

Nitrogen

I don't know that method well enough to recommend anything reliable.

.. if you aren't up for it then it's not your time.

I'm sorry but what a lode of bullshit. Ive said this before SI is instinct and has nothing to do with logic and reasonable thinking. It will require at least some inner force to commit suicide. If you keep making excuses you will just die a slow and painful death.

 

[virtualoctopus]

If you don't mind my asking, how did you manage to get your hands on an nitrogen tank? I assume one can't do it with just whipits?

 

[Metalhead]

As a jumping survivor from years ago i may say prozac gave me courage back then. It made me jump with 0 hesitation. But it depends on brain chemistry at the moment and may be different for different people.

Did you ingest a large quantity of Prozac pre-jump ?

 

[tidalwxves]

I don't agree. There is no way I will ever do it without having to force myself. This isn't easy. I'm not sure why people think this is an easy thing to do even if you want it more than you've ever wanted anything before.

I never said it was an easy task, but there is a difference between making a difficult decision and forcing yourself to do something when you are unprepared

 

[Daniel905]

I don't agree.

I'm surprised two people in this thread are telling the OP he "isn't ready". The poor guy is trying to do it but scared. Being scared is normal.

Quit trying to encourage people bud. seriously. How can being scrared be normal when having suicidal thoughts to begin with is far from normal?! What exactly are you waiting for?

 

[Daniel905]

No telling someone you "disagree" that they aren't ready to die is encouraging bud... According to you everyone who has suicidal thoughts once in awhile is ready to die no if and or butts? and if they're scared it's not because they really don't wanna die, the feelings are normal and they should just get on with it right?... again what are you waiting for?

 

[Daniel905]

The man is trying to ctb. But he is scared. Being scared is normal. No idea why you want to twist it around to saying I'm encouraging him but you seem determined to keep trying. This is not the forum to start accusing people of that.

Why not go to a pro life forum with that argument.

Not everyone who says they wanna catch the bus actually want to catch the bus if they were thinking clearly.. maybe encourage them if they're scared to wait and see how they feel later instead of saying naw man its normal hurry up...

 

[Meditation guide]

maybe encourage them if they're scared to wait and see how they feel later instead of saying naw man its normal hurry up...

As you know I did not say that. Why are you lying? I don't want him to "hurry up" and my name is not "bud".

Not everyone who says they wanna catch the bus actually want to catch the bus

Please just try to honor what the OP said in his first post.

 

[Captive of Mind]

Not everyone who says they wanna catch the bus actually want to catch the bus if they were thinking clearly.. maybe encourage them if they're scared to wait and see how they feel later instead of saying naw man its normal hurry up...

Dude, bug off. You're in the wrong place to be spouting the things you do. I saw you on another thread too.

People are here about to partake in the most personal, intimate decision they could make and you are attacking the ones who offer them compassionate, understanding words.

The members here make it abundantly clear that the person who is trying to ctb should think things through, not act on impulse, and that they could back out and seek recovery at any time. You are picking fights with people on a suicide forum.You aren't saving lives, you're making people feel worse all around.

 

[pleasethistime]

I

Can I ask you how much did you take?

I dont think it was much much. But i was only starting to use it.
No not much. Prozac is known to give courage, lessen anxiety and cause suicide in some people. It happened to me.

Did you ingest a large quantity of Prozac pre-jump ?

 

[Wayfaerer]

It takes losing it all. If you have any hope left then you won't CTB.

 

[StateOfMind]

It takes losing it all. If you have any hope left then you won't CTB.

I disagree. I feel like there are many people who ctb even when having a fairly "good" life. Like that famous Japanese actress who died recently. There are many more examples.

Japanese actress Yuko Takeuchi found dead at 40

The award-winning actress and mother of two is believed to have taken her own life at the age of 40.

www.bbc.com

 

[Wayfaerer]

I disagree. I feel like there are many people who ctb even when having a fairly "good" life. Like that famous Japanese actress who died recently. There are many more examples.

Japanese actress Yuko Takeuchi found dead at 40

The award-winning actress and mother of two is believed to have taken her own life at the age of 40.

www.bbc.com

They believed they were utterly hopeless. If you can believe it whole-heartedly then that's good enough.