C

Circles

Visionary
Sep 3, 2018
2,297
If there even is a difference really between the two. But anyway I just feel like I'm fooling myself trying to do this whatever this is. Recovery doesn't feel right to me. I have spent so much of my life being depressed and suicidal that I just can't see any other way or a way out. And because of how much work I have to do just to finally get anywhere in life especially to try to stop being depressed or suicidal I'm already wanting to give up. I hope for a lot of things but I in my heart and mind I'll never have what I want or want to experience cause the odds are stacked against me. I just feel like I'm one of those people that was meant to fail no matter what, just another statistic that some people are going to lose no matter how hard they try. It's like I've woken up from a coma and now just realize everything is too late to change and if I can change anything it's going to be hard. There's nothing worse than false hope and pretending that things will get better when I know and feel it in my darkened heart that isn't true. I'm telling myself I have nothing to lose because I've already hit rock bottom so many times but I'm afraid of losing at life again.
 
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Feeding Pigeons

Feeding Pigeons

Warlock
Aug 5, 2021
776
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motel rooms

motel rooms

Survivor of incest. Gay. Please don't PM me.
Apr 13, 2021
7,084
I don't know. Don't dream big, set realistic goals for yourself.
 
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Sides

Sides

Member
Dec 28, 2021
35
If there even is a difference really between the two. But anyway I just feel like I'm fooling myself trying to do this whatever this is. Recovery doesn't feel right to me. I have spent so much of my life being depressed and suicidal that I just can't see any other way or a way out. And because of how much work I have to do just to finally get anywhere in life especially to try to stop being depressed or suicidal I'm already wanting to give up. I hope for a lot of things but I in my heart and mind I'll never have what I want or want to experience cause the odds are stacked against me. I just feel like I'm one of those people that was meant to fail no matter what, just another statistic that some people are going to lose no matter how hard they try. It's like I've woken up from a coma and now just realize everything is too late to change and if I can change anything it's going to be hard. There's nothing worse than false hope and pretending that things will get better when I know and feel it in my darkened heart that isn't true. I'm telling myself I have nothing to lose because I've already hit rock bottom so many times but I'm afraid of losing at life again.

I wish I had the answer for you. I wish I had the answer for me.

I do know only one thing though: If you don't try, nothing will ever change for the better.

So try. And then time will tell. And if it works, great. And if it doesn't, then at least you can be proud you had the strength and courage to try.

It's all we can do.

That, and support and love each other.

So: I support your choice, whatever it is. I love you, whoever you may be. Now please get out there and try.

Not for me. For you.

Love, Sides
 
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S

summers

Visionary
Nov 4, 2020
2,495
Just my opinion, but hope is wishing for something that has a reasonable chance of happening. For example, you get pulled over, and hope to just get a warning.

False hope is believing there is a (reasonable) chance something may happen, but it's either definitely not going to happen, or the chances are so small, that it may as well be zero. For example, you're having money problems, and consider winning the lottery a realistic possible solution. It doesn't mean don't play, it means that you should not count on winning any substantial amount.

Just because something is challenging, it doesn't mean that wanting it to happen is false hope - you just have to be realistic about the effort required.
 
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Depressed Cat

Depressed Cat

Mage
Jan 4, 2022
567
For me, every hope eventually turns into false hope. 😢

I suffer from recurring Major Depressive Disorder and my severely depressive periods are interspersed with periods of near-normalcy or normalcy.

During my severe depressive episodes, I often think about, and obtain the means to CTB, with the idea of using it. Then something happens and I'm led to think there's hope for me and I can recover and lead a normal life again.

But fate is not kind to me at all. The period of recovery and normalcy is followed by another severe depressive episode where I think CTB is the best way out of the pain and suffering. The hope of leading a normal life is crushed and turns out to be a false hope.

And so it goes on and on. I'm leading a wretched & miserable life.
 
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Sherri

Sherri

Archangel
Sep 28, 2020
13,794
There us hope, and there is hopeless sometimes in my life, I try not to let hopeless win. Daily battle.
 
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clown_17

clown_17

Almost gone, it almost worked
Oct 24, 2020
288
Real hope is being okay with whatever happens

False hope is praying for unlikely scenarios because you need them to be true
 
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