retVarii
So desperate... so lost.
- Aug 21, 2024
- 12
For the next couple of days I'm planning to completely shut off from the world before my attempt. I would like to shut off my lights, close the curtains, lay on my bed with my eyes closed and lose myself in thoughts.
Since my childhood I've been developing imaginary worlds in my mind where I would go to fantasize. Mostly I put myself in situations where I actually do something and get recognized for it, sometimes I would create fictional stories (not about myself) or fantasize about creating video games. But then I would look at my surroundings and be reminded that this is all just a fantazy that will never come true, no matter how much I want to believe it.
Now I want to bury myself in my imagination so deeply that I forget where I am, like in a dream. I want to make myself believe I'm in my former villa in Spain. Let me see if I can do a maladaptive daydreaming.
I'll also play music a lot to help myself distance from the real world.
Since my childhood I've been developing imaginary worlds in my mind where I would go to fantasize. Mostly I put myself in situations where I actually do something and get recognized for it, sometimes I would create fictional stories (not about myself) or fantasize about creating video games. But then I would look at my surroundings and be reminded that this is all just a fantazy that will never come true, no matter how much I want to believe it.
Now I want to bury myself in my imagination so deeply that I forget where I am, like in a dream. I want to make myself believe I'm in my former villa in Spain. Let me see if I can do a maladaptive daydreaming.
I'll also play music a lot to help myself distance from the real world.
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