141592653
TW She/Her
- Aug 9, 2020
- 119
Hi !
Yesterday, as some of you know, I asked in a very insistant manner to be on vocal with someone. I tried every single person connected to talk to me for 10 minutes on Discord. there were between 20 and 30 persons connected. I know this call could have trigger someone and I specically insistes on this point so SS has one more person in crisis.
Nobody helped for 45 min, even if I asked some person in PM. After 45min, @braketimez called and helped me a lot.
I don't exclude that in the first 45 min, nobody could endure this conversation. Though, I doubt it. Strongly. Why ? Because we've never been told to help people. Maybe your parents told you to give some money to homeless persons. That can help. But why do we do that? Cauz it doesn't need to make an effort or spend a moment with them. Even the language itself is the reflect of the mentality : you either "spend a moment with them" or you "give them a moment". Yeah, your time is more valuable than give some bucks and leave without giving a fuck.
That's what we mainky do here. We all come venting (since it's for you, you don't give or spend your time), then you go venting (I approve venting it's a cool way to feel better) and then to receive comfort, you add
tags to another people's problem so that inconsciously, you''ll receive some to. Otherwise it's a good collective therapy but NOBODY is helping other people than themselves. I do it a lot and it's enjoyable, useful and sain. You give, you receive, money system with as the main money. No surprise that there are some ranks and countability about activity.
So what is really helping somebody. Helping means commitment, confidence and bravery.
I want to tell you the story I tried to tell yesterday as a last resource to be helped (I don't want to be a hero or get a clap clap, ususally I keep this to myself but I was seeing psychward coming quick and I was to afraid of the hallu)
So I have now statement : SS is no better than Paris underground. You might have your reason... OK But things like "sorry I 've got to work " or "I have a very important phone calll" or "I have class" => all that means you don't know the real priorities. I had class the day I mentionned... I missed a whole course. And believe I woul've prefered to be in class than being insulted, ignored and despised by meds. I know I'm not the friend to every body. But the day cant call your fiends cauz they'll put you in psych, maybe you'll be happy to have on Discord. I've done, I'll do it again whatever the matter and almost whatever the people.
The thing is that you don't care. You feel very bad and you suffer but it's the only feelings and suffering that import to you.
That explains nobody here talks about political suicide : cause you want to end your pain, which I understand but not the others.
If I kill mysel I'll do a political suicide about pro choice stuf but mainly about how people are forsaken, even on here, self-called safe even if ihave to educate people about LGBT+ every fkin day.
I love and care about you all.
Yesterday, as some of you know, I asked in a very insistant manner to be on vocal with someone. I tried every single person connected to talk to me for 10 minutes on Discord. there were between 20 and 30 persons connected. I know this call could have trigger someone and I specically insistes on this point so SS has one more person in crisis.
Nobody helped for 45 min, even if I asked some person in PM. After 45min, @braketimez called and helped me a lot.
I don't exclude that in the first 45 min, nobody could endure this conversation. Though, I doubt it. Strongly. Why ? Because we've never been told to help people. Maybe your parents told you to give some money to homeless persons. That can help. But why do we do that? Cauz it doesn't need to make an effort or spend a moment with them. Even the language itself is the reflect of the mentality : you either "spend a moment with them" or you "give them a moment". Yeah, your time is more valuable than give some bucks and leave without giving a fuck.
That's what we mainky do here. We all come venting (since it's for you, you don't give or spend your time), then you go venting (I approve venting it's a cool way to feel better) and then to receive comfort, you add
tags to another people's problem so that inconsciously, you''ll receive some to. Otherwise it's a good collective therapy but NOBODY is helping other people than themselves. I do it a lot and it's enjoyable, useful and sain. You give, you receive, money system with as the main money. No surprise that there are some ranks and countability about activity.So what is really helping somebody. Helping means commitment, confidence and bravery.
I want to tell you the story I tried to tell yesterday as a last resource to be helped (I don't want to be a hero or get a clap clap, ususally I keep this to myself but I was seeing psychward coming quick and I was to afraid of the hallu)
I was going to the thatre. And on my left, someone was crying pretty baddly, with bottle of wine at his hand. So I stopped and asked him if I could do something.
FACT : the guy was astonished and send to me he was here for years crying and that I was the only person speaking to him
He semt very bad so I canceled the movie. I thought he could sober up by talking to me. But he went worse and worse. I have to precise that this guy was transphobic, he always misgendered me and was also mysogynist. Though he was in danger. Châtelet-les-Halles in Paris is the paradise of stealing and some young white supremacists (there are few but it happens) who beat defenseless people. So since he told me to not call hospital (probably cauz he would return in rehab or some homeless shelters which are worse than the street.
Here we are, me with all his weight on me, him being 20kg more than me and I had to stop cauz I had no strength anymore (beginning of HRT). I asked loudly to every people around to help. Nobody moved.Then we got to the underground and he fell of all his 80kg on me. I yelled for help [CONTEXT : Châtelet-les-halle = 3rd busiest railway station in Europe, and it was day]. Nobody came so I tried my best to lay him on the floor but I hit quite hard his head. Again nobody gave a shit (I speak about hundreds of presons per minute). Then a security agent came and called for help. I explained the situation and then "Incident reported" and went do whatever she does. So I was alone with the guy who xas the hell anxious but I didn't undeerstand what he said.
Then 4 people between 16 and 20 came and started to take photos. I said they didn't have the right to do so without his consentiment (and it's the law). The didn't gave a shit.
I asked again and again for help and they started to put their hands in his pocket and take his bag. So for the first time since my transition, I played the role of a guy. I did opera so I master my (male à voice) and I ran toward them and put my front in front of the one who seemed the less sure of him. Then I didn't let them talk and said everything I remember of Penal Code about this situation and in particular I know "Abus de faiblesse' in France cen be 10 years jail. They left insulting of a whole bunch of traphobic insults. And then I waited 30 minutes for help to come (total of the deal more than 3 hours) and help said : " He's not in the good position" [remember the guy was 80kg]. And tey didn't say anything else and went.
I never knew what happened after.
FACT : the guy was astonished and send to me he was here for years crying and that I was the only person speaking to him
He semt very bad so I canceled the movie. I thought he could sober up by talking to me. But he went worse and worse. I have to precise that this guy was transphobic, he always misgendered me and was also mysogynist. Though he was in danger. Châtelet-les-Halles in Paris is the paradise of stealing and some young white supremacists (there are few but it happens) who beat defenseless people. So since he told me to not call hospital (probably cauz he would return in rehab or some homeless shelters which are worse than the street.
Here we are, me with all his weight on me, him being 20kg more than me and I had to stop cauz I had no strength anymore (beginning of HRT). I asked loudly to every people around to help. Nobody moved.Then we got to the underground and he fell of all his 80kg on me. I yelled for help [CONTEXT : Châtelet-les-halle = 3rd busiest railway station in Europe, and it was day]. Nobody came so I tried my best to lay him on the floor but I hit quite hard his head. Again nobody gave a shit (I speak about hundreds of presons per minute). Then a security agent came and called for help. I explained the situation and then "Incident reported" and went do whatever she does. So I was alone with the guy who xas the hell anxious but I didn't undeerstand what he said.
Then 4 people between 16 and 20 came and started to take photos. I said they didn't have the right to do so without his consentiment (and it's the law). The didn't gave a shit.
I asked again and again for help and they started to put their hands in his pocket and take his bag. So for the first time since my transition, I played the role of a guy. I did opera so I master my (male à voice) and I ran toward them and put my front in front of the one who seemed the less sure of him. Then I didn't let them talk and said everything I remember of Penal Code about this situation and in particular I know "Abus de faiblesse' in France cen be 10 years jail. They left insulting of a whole bunch of traphobic insults. And then I waited 30 minutes for help to come (total of the deal more than 3 hours) and help said : " He's not in the good position" [remember the guy was 80kg]. And tey didn't say anything else and went.
I never knew what happened after.
So I have now statement : SS is no better than Paris underground. You might have your reason... OK But things like "sorry I 've got to work " or "I have a very important phone calll" or "I have class" => all that means you don't know the real priorities. I had class the day I mentionned... I missed a whole course. And believe I woul've prefered to be in class than being insulted, ignored and despised by meds. I know I'm not the friend to every body. But the day cant call your fiends cauz they'll put you in psych, maybe you'll be happy to have on Discord. I've done, I'll do it again whatever the matter and almost whatever the people.
The thing is that you don't care. You feel very bad and you suffer but it's the only feelings and suffering that import to you.
That explains nobody here talks about political suicide : cause you want to end your pain, which I understand but not the others.
If I kill mysel I'll do a political suicide about pro choice stuf but mainly about how people are forsaken, even on here, self-called safe even if ihave to educate people about LGBT+ every fkin day.
I love and care about you all.
